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Description
Bros Before Hoes

Naruto: "Sasuke... I swear..." -Clenches fist- "I WILL get you back from Orochimaru... and bring you back to Konoha..."

Director: "And... CUT!" -Bell Rings- "That's a rap people! Enjoy your vacation!"

-People chattering-

Naruto: "Damn, I hate those sappy takes!"

Itachi: "I feel your pain dude."

Nauto: "Yo! Itachi! When'd you get here? You weren't in today's episode were you?"

Itachi: "Nah. I'm just hanging out. Gotta take creampuff home too."

Naruto: "Ah... Just had to do the whole 'I'll bring you back...' speech BLEH.."

Itachi: "Owch... I hate those scenes..."

Naruto: "Yep... I did get a little Sakura hugging though."

Itachi: "Nice."

Naruto: "You know it."

Sasuke: "Hi Naruto!" -Running in slow motion with pink sparkles flashing around him-

Naruto & Itachi: "OH SHIT..."

Sasuke: "Oh Naruto! You were just great on set today!"

Itachi: "Later dude." -Starts to turn away-

Naruto: "Wait just a second! He's YOUR brother!"

Itachi: "I have a date."

Naruto: "Bros before hoes!"

Itachi: "Bah..."

Sasuke: "So... um... Naruto... Will you go out with me?"

Naruto: "HELL NO!"

Sasuke: "You ALWAYS say that! Yet you're always teasing me you sexy thing! I even put your picture on a porn magazine and I... Well you know the rest!"

Naruto: -Backs away slowly-

Itachi: "Psst!" -Whispering- "Naruto. I say we use a jutsu to make some sucker look like you and ditch..."

Naruto: -Whispering- "Agreed, but where are we supposed to find someone stupid enough to fall for something like that...?"

Neji: -Walks up smiling- "Hiya everyone!"

Naruto & Itachi: "Bingo..."

Neji: "Uh... Why are you guys looking at me like that...?" -Starts to back away-

Narutoi: "Get him!"

-Naruto and Itachi run after Neji-

Neji: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS?!"

Itachi: "Wait up! We just wanna talk!"

Naruto: "Yeah! Just come here for a second!"

Sasuke: -WAY behind. He hasn't even noticed Naruto and Itachi are gone- "I like ponies, and rainbows, and unicorns, and-Hey wait a minute!"

Neji: "Why?! What do you want?!"

Itachi: "We just wanna learn more about your Blind Jutsu!"

Naruto: "Yeah! So just slow down for a sec!"

Neji: "FOR THE LAST TIME I'M NOT FUCKING BLIND!"

-Naruto grabs Neji while he's distracted yelling-

Neji: "What's going on?! Let me go!"

Naruto: "I got you! BELIEVE IT! Oh wait... That's right. I'm not in the freaking dub... I don't have to say that."

Itachi: "Oh yeah. I heard about that. That sucks dude."

Neji: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

-Itachi throws a shuriken pinning Neji to a tree-

Itachi: "It's rude to interrupt people when they're talking. Anyway, I feel your pain Naruto."

Naruto: "Hey... In the dub wasn't your temporary VA the same one as that fagot Gai?"

Itachi: "Oh gawd. Don't even remind me..."

Naruto: "Aww... That sucks man..."

Itachi: "You know it. Meh. At least Freeman stepped up."

Neji: "What are you two talking about! Let me down!"

Naruto: "They really fucked us over didn't they?"

Itachi: "Damn you America... Damn you all to hell..."

Naruto: "Man, I'm getting sick of this job..."

Itachi: "Yeah. It's all those bitches that always pair me up with my own brother‘s fault! You know they're what turned him gay!"

Neji: "WHAT?!"

Naruto: "Ooooohhh... You talking about the yaoi fangirls?"

Itachi: "Oh Yeah. I mean... Damn... All I said is that I wanted to kill my brother, but NOOOOO they had to take it the wrong way!"

Naruto: "Hey! Consider yourself lucky! They made me a fucking man-whore because of your brother!"

Neji: "You guys are scaring me!"

Itachi: "What do you mean?"

Naruto: "I'm telling you... It's all because of that one kiss... 'It'll be funny' they said! I BEGGED the directors not to make me do it cause I knew about this yaoi shit! They said 'No! It's not yaoi! It's all for comedy! Nobody'll think of it like that! It'll be great!' Tell that to the 20,000,000 shitty fanfics and doujinshi about Sasuke fucking me! Bunch of fucking perverts man!"

Neji: "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

Itachi: "Damn dude... You do have it worse..."

Naruto: "I know man... Don't tell anyone this... but I've been thinking about quitting."

Itachi: "But you're the main character. No Naruto, no show. And really, isn‘t that all that matters?"

Naruto: "I know. I know... but... I mean... For crying out load... My grandma did a image search to see how the show was coming along and she finds fucking porn of me, Sasuke, Gaara, Shikamaru, and Neji having fivesome! My grandma thinks I'm a gay pervert because of this show!"

Itachi & Neji: "DUDE! EWW!"

Naruto: "I know, right?!"

Itachi: "Jeez... Wait... What were we gonna do with Neji? I got so pissed off I forgot..."

Naruto: "You know. So did I..."

Sasuke: -Nearby- "OH NARUTO! MY LOVE! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Itachi: "Now I remember..." -Both him and Naruto glare evilly at Neji-

Neji: "NO! NO, PLEASE!"

-Later-

Sasuke: -Comes upon Neji disguised as Naruto tied to a tree with his mouth taped up- "Aha! There you are my Naruto!"

Neji: "Mmmph!" -Incoherent mumbling-

Sasuke: -Unties 'Naruto'- "Don't worry Naruto! Your Sasuke'll make everything better!"

Neji: "Mmmmph! MMMMMPH!!!" -Incoherent, but distinct cursing and swearing-

-Itachi & Naruto are in a nearby tree watching a horrifying sight begin to unfold before them. They turn away-

Sasuke: "OH! NARUTO! YOU'RE SOOOOO BIG!"

Neji: "MMMMMMPH!!! MMMMPPPHHH!!!!" (Translation: 'I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU GUYS!!!')

-They ignore any other noises they might hear-

Itachi: "That poor sucker..."

Naruto: "Sorry, Neji... Bros before hoes... But not getting raped before bros..."

TO BE CONTINUED...

Description
Bros Before Hoes

Naruto: "Sasuke... I swear..." -Clenches fist- "I WILL get you back from Orochimaru... and bring you back to Konoha..."

Director: "And... CUT!" -Bell Rings- "That's a rap people! Enjoy your vacation!"

-People chattering-

Naruto: "Damn, I hate those sappy takes!"

Itachi: "I feel your pain dude."

Nauto: "Yo! Itachi! When'd you get here? You weren't in today's episode were you?"

Itachi: "Nah. I'm just hanging out. Gotta take creampuff home too."

Naruto: "Ah... Just had to do the whole 'I'll bring you back...' speech BLEH.."

Itachi: "Owch... I hate those scenes..."

Naruto: "Yep... I did get a little Sakura hugging though."

Itachi: "Nice."

Naruto: "You know it."

Sasuke: "Hi Naruto!" -Running in slow motion with pink sparkles flashing around him-

Naruto & Itachi: "OH SHIT..."

Sasuke: "Oh Naruto! You were just great on set today!"

Itachi: "Later dude." -Starts to turn away-

Naruto: "Wait just a second! He's YOUR brother!"

Itachi: "I have a date."

Naruto: "Bros before hoes!"

Itachi: "Bah..."

Sasuke: "So... um... Naruto... Will you go out with me?"

Naruto: "HELL NO!"

Sasuke: "You ALWAYS say that! Yet you're always teasing me you sexy thing! I even put your picture on a porn magazine and I... Well you know the rest!"

Naruto: -Backs away slowly-

Itachi: "Psst!" -Whispering- "Naruto. I say we use a jutsu to make some sucker look like you and ditch..."

Naruto: -Whispering- "Agreed, but where are we supposed to find someone stupid enough to fall for something like that...?"

Neji: -Walks up smiling- "Hiya everyone!"

Naruto & Itachi: "Bingo..."

Neji: "Uh... Why are you guys looking at me like that...?" -Starts to back away-

Narutoi: "Get him!"

-Naruto and Itachi run after Neji-

Neji: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS?!"

Itachi: "Wait up! We just wanna talk!"

Naruto: "Yeah! Just come here for a second!"

Sasuke: -WAY behind. He hasn't even noticed Naruto and Itachi are gone- "I like ponies, and rainbows, and unicorns, and-Hey wait a minute!"

Neji: "Why?! What do you want?!"

Itachi: "We just wanna learn more about your Blind Jutsu!"

Naruto: "Yeah! So just slow down for a sec!"

Neji: "FOR THE LAST TIME I'M NOT FUCKING BLIND!"

-Naruto grabs Neji while he's distracted yelling-

Neji: "What's going on?! Let me go!"

Naruto: "I got you! BELIEVE IT! Oh wait... That's right. I'm not in the freaking dub... I don't have to say that."

Itachi: "Oh yeah. I heard about that. That sucks dude."

Neji: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

-Itachi throws a shuriken pinning Neji to a tree-

Itachi: "It's rude to interrupt people when they're talking. Anyway, I feel your pain Naruto."

Naruto: "Hey... In the dub wasn't your temporary VA the same one as that fagot Gai?"

Itachi: "Oh gawd. Don't even remind me..."

Naruto: "Aww... That sucks man..."

Itachi: "You know it. Meh. At least Freeman stepped up."

Neji: "What are you two talking about! Let me down!"

Naruto: "They really fucked us over didn't they?"

Itachi: "Damn you America... Damn you all to hell..."

Naruto: "Man, I'm getting sick of this job..."

Itachi: "Yeah. It's all those bitches that always pair me up with my own brother‘s fault! You know they're what turned him gay!"

Neji: "WHAT?!"

Naruto: "Ooooohhh... You talking about the yaoi fangirls?"

Itachi: "Oh Yeah. I mean... Damn... All I said is that I wanted to kill my brother, but NOOOOO they had to take it the wrong way!"

Naruto: "Hey! Consider yourself lucky! They made me a fucking man-whore because of your brother!"

Neji: "You guys are scaring me!"

Itachi: "What do you mean?"

Naruto: "I'm telling you... It's all because of that one kiss... 'It'll be funny' they said! I BEGGED the directors not to make me do it cause I knew about this yaoi shit! They said 'No! It's not yaoi! It's all for comedy! Nobody'll think of it like that! It'll be great!' Tell that to the 20,000,000 shitty fanfics and doujinshi about Sasuke fucking me! Bunch of fucking perverts man!"

Neji: "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

Itachi: "Damn dude... You do have it worse..."

Naruto: "I know man... Don't tell anyone this... but I've been thinking about quitting."

Itachi: "But you're the main character. No Naruto, no show. And really, isn‘t that all that matters?"

Naruto: "I know. I know... but... I mean... For crying out load... My grandma did a image search to see how the show was coming along and she finds fucking porn of me, Sasuke, Gaara, Shikamaru, and Neji having fivesome! My grandma thinks I'm a gay pervert because of this show!"

Itachi & Neji: "DUDE! EWW!"

Naruto: "I know, right?!"

Itachi: "Jeez... Wait... What were we gonna do with Neji? I got so pissed off I forgot..."

Naruto: "You know. So did I..."

Sasuke: -Nearby- "OH NARUTO! MY LOVE! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Itachi: "Now I remember..." -Both him and Naruto glare evilly at Neji-

Neji: "NO! NO, PLEASE!"

-Later-

Sasuke: -Comes upon Neji disguised as Naruto tied to a tree with his mouth taped up- "Aha! There you are my Naruto!"

Neji: "Mmmph!" -Incoherent mumbling-

Sasuke: -Unties 'Naruto'- "Don't worry Naruto! Your Sasuke'll make everything better!"

Neji: "Mmmmph! MMMMMPH!!!" -Incoherent, but distinct cursing and swearing-

-Itachi & Naruto are in a nearby tree watching a horrifying sight begin to unfold before them. They turn away-

Sasuke: "OH! NARUTO! YOU'RE SOOOOO BIG!"

Neji: "MMMMMMPH!!! MMMMPPPHHH!!!!" (Translation: 'I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU GUYS!!!')

-They ignore any other noises they might hear-

Itachi: "That poor sucker..."

Naruto: "Sorry, Neji... Bros before hoes... But not getting raped before bros..."

TO BE CONTINUED...