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Novanator — NARUTO: OSOoC - Chapter 27
Published: 2008-01-23 19:20:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 12766; Favourites: 214; Downloads: 101
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HEEERE'S JHONNY!Karin: “The Happy Place is here to serve you!”
Deidara: “It’s like every word that comes out of there mouth is a sex pun waiting to be noticed…”
Suigetsu: -Gasp- “Karin! You forgot your dramatic entrance!”
Karin: “Oh twaddlecock, you right!” -Runs outside, climbs up to the roof, then falls through the ceiling- “TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVASTATION!”
Suigetsu: “Hey Mommy! I have a sharp object up my ass! Guess what it is?!”
Deidara: -Twitch- “I… have no idea…”
Suigetsu: “Broken glass! You were right Karin! This does work better than dildos!”
Karin: “I told you!”
Deidara: “Ugh…” (Here goes nothing…) -Gulp- “Listen up, uh… SON… MOMMY needs your help with something VERY… important…” (KILL ME!!!!!)
Suigetsu: “Yes Mommy?” -Smiling-
Kakuzu: “Now there’s a real trooper…” -Holding hat over his chest-
Deidara: “MOMMY… would like you and your sister… to pose as our good friend “Uncle Pein’s” daughters… Do you think you could do that for MOMMY…?” -Twitching uncontrollably- (GOD, IF YOU TRULY EXIST AND HAVE ONE SHRED OF MERCY IN YOU, YOU WILL STRIKE ME DOWN RIGHT FUCKING NOW!)
Suigetsu: “Of course Mommy!” -Transforms into a girl- “I’d do anything for you!”
Deidara: “GOOOD…” -Has begun foaming at the mouth-
Suigetsu: “Come on sis! Let’s please Mommy so she’ll abandon us again!”
Karin: “YAY!” -Transforms-
Pein: -Walks out from his bedroom- “I-”
Suigetsu & Karin: “DADDY!” -Both hug-tackle him-
Pein: “W-WHAT THE HELL?!”
Kakuzu: "Aw. You’re daughter’s alive after all. That’s modern medicine for ya.”
Pein: “TH-TH-THEY AREN’T MY-!”
Kakuzu: -Raises eyebrow- “Uh… Uh- I mean…”
Suigetsu: “WE MISSED YOU SO MUCH DADDY! CAN YOU HELP ME UNHOOK MY BRA?!”
Karin: -Rubbing her boobs against him- “Uh-oh Daddy! I think I need a diaper change!”
Suigetsu: “Daddy! Can we play with Mr. Fingerman again?!”
Pein: “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO?!”
Suigetsu: “Aw… Don’t worry Daddy! We’re adults now!”
Karin: “Yeah! We’re not jail-bait!
Kakuzu: -Laughing- “Ahaha! This is priceless!”
Deidara: -Throwing up- “Forgive me for not being able to fully enjoy it…”
Karin: -Singing- “Oh Daddy, Daddy! I promise, you won’t do tiiiiime! Lick my baby-back behind!” - Shaking her ass-
Pein: -Crying-
Kakuzu: “Hm… wonder how long they’re gonna keep this up…”
Suigetsu: “I WANT YOU INSIDE ME DADDY!”
Karin: “I WANT IT IN MY MOUTH!”
Pein: -Crying hysterically- “OKAY! OKAY! I DON’T REALLY HAVE A DAUGHTER AND I WENT TO MEXICO FOR SPRING BREAK, OKAY?! THE JIGS UP! JUST STOP! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, STOP!”
Suigetsu: “Why won’t Daddy’s little soldier come out the play?!”
Karin: -Baby’s voice- “Where’s my wittle fwiend, huh? WHERE’S MY WITTLE FWIEND?!”
Deidara: “Ugh… Okay, okay, kids. That’s enough. He says he’ll fess up.”
Suigetsu: “LOVE US DADDY! LOVE US GOOD!”
Deidara: -Using a megaphone- “I SAID THAT’S ENOUGH ALREADY! MOMMY SAYS ENOUGH ALREADY!”
Suigetsu: -Transforms back- “Did we do good Mommy?
Deidara: “YES, YES, EXCELLENT MOMMY’S VERY PROUD OF YOU, NOW GET THE HELL OUT!”
Suigetsu: “Okay! I love you Mommy! Let’s go Karin! We can still make our daily rape appointment!” -Disappears-
Karin: “HOORAY!” -Also disappears-
Kakuzu: “Way to take one for the team.”
Deidara: “UGH… I don’t feel so good…”
Kakuzu: “So, did you learn your lesson?”
Pein: -Fire in eyes- “YOU… YOU TWO…YOU WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS…?”
Deidara: “Uh… Yes?”
Pein: “GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Deidara: “I THINK we went to far…”
Kakuzu; “What was you first clue?”
Pein: “DIE!!!!!!!!!!”
Deidara & Kakuzu: -Run like hell-
Pein: -Chasing them with a chainsaw-
Itachi: -Walking down the hall- “What the-?!”
Deidara & Kakuzu: -Run by at the speed of light-
Itachi: “Eh?”
Pein: -Runs past Itachi; singing- “I’M ABOUT TO KILL YOU~…”
Itachi: “Hoshit. They should’ve just given him the Sea World tickets…”
Deidara: “SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT-! -Hides in the first room he sees-
Kakuzu: -Runs into Kisame’s room and slams the door-
Kisame: -Swimming in shark tank- “What the hell man?!”
Kakuzu: -Whispering- “SHUT THE HELL UP…”
Pein: -Saws a hole in the door- “HELLO CLEVELAND!” -Peeking through hole and foamy at the mouth-
Kisame: “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HIM?!”
Kakuzu: “IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY DAMMIT!”
-The door explodes-
Pein: -Standing in the doorway- “PEEK-A-BOO, I SEE YOU…”
Kakuzu: “Shit…”
-Meanwhile-
Deidara: -Moves a bunch of furniture in front of the door, then sits down cowering in fear- “I KNEW THIS WAS A BAD IDEA. OH GAWD I AM SO FUCKING DEAD…”
Sasori: -Naked by the computer- HAVEN’T YOU EVEN HEARD OF KNOCKING?!
Deidara: “WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!
-Axe suddenly busts through the door-
Deidara: -Backs far away from the door- “CRAP…”
Sasori: -Wearing bathrobe- “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HIM?!”
Deidara: “WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU DOING ON THE COMPUTER?!”
Sasori: “I REALLY DON’T THINK THAT’S RELEVANT TO YOUR CURRENT SITUATION!”
Deidara: “NO, BUT IT’S KIND OF HARD NOT TO ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT THESE KINDS OF THINGS!”
Pein: -From the other side of the door- “LET’S PLAY HIDE AND SEEK…”
Deidara: “OKAY. FUCK THIS. IF I’M GONNA DIE, I’M GONNA DIE MAKING FUN OF WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WERE DOING ON THAT COMPUTER!” -Runs towards the computer-
Sasori: -Blocks the computer- “I DON’T CARE IF YOU’RE GONNA DIE! IT’S FUCKING PRIVATE!”
Deidara: “TOO BAD!” -Shoves Sasori out of the way, there are naked pictures of Tsunade on the monitor- “DUDE… WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”
Kakuzu: -Busts through the window- “I think I lost hi- WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE COMPUTER?!”
Sasori: “I LIKE OLDER WOMEN OKAY?!”
Deidara: “DUDE, THAT’S JUST FUCKING GROSS!”
Pein: -Banging on the door- “WARRIORS~… COME OUT AND PLA~AY~…”
Sasori: “THIS REALLY ISN’T THE TIME FOR YOU TO BE CRITICIZING ME?! ESPECIALLY YOU, KAKUZU! YOU’RE FUCKING ANCIENT!”
Kakuzu: “I MAY BE OLD BUT I DON’T DATE OLDER WOMEN! Ugh. That reminds me…” -Dials cell-phone- “Honey, I’m about to die, but I just wanted to tell you… YOU’RE A FUCKING WHORE AND I KNOW ABOUT YOU AND HILLARY CLINTON!” -Hangs up-
Deidara: “I can’t believe this… We’re really about to die… I mean, I know we always said we wanted to die, but damn…”
Kakuzu: I know! I never though it would actually happen…”
Pein: -Banging on the door even harder-
Kakuzu: “HERE! TAKE ALL MY MONEY!” -Slides a bunch of money under the door-
Pein: “Okay, but I’m still going to kill you!”
Kakuzu: “God dammit…”
Deidara: -Hugging Sasori- “I’M NOT READY TO DIE!”
Sasori: “GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!” -Shoves him off-
Deidara: “VISIT MY AUNT AND UNCLE IN THE NURSING HOME FOR ME!”
Kakuzu: “Tell Hidan he’s the best partner a guy could ask for.”
Sasori: “You guys are scaring me…”
Deidara: “Tell Tobi he is a good boy even though he’s a fucking idiot!”
Kakuzu: “Tell my mom I’m sorry I stole her credit cards and blamed it on dad…”
Deidara: “And tell Zetsu he’s just a misunderstood monster!”
Kakuzu: “Not me, I still hate that freak!”
Zetsu: -Emerges from the ground- “AW DEIDARA!” -Hugs Deidara and starts crying- “I didn’t know you cared so much!”
Deidara: “GET THE HELL OFF OF ME! I SAID YOU WERE MISUNDERSTOOD, I STILL FUCKING HATE YOU!”
Zetsu: “Aw…” -Walks away sadly-
Pein: -Busts down the door, holding chainsaw- “HEEEEEEEEEERE’S JOHNY!”
Kakuzu: “TELL THE AKATSUKI I’LL MISS THEM!”
Sasori: “Yeah, I’m not gonna do any of that.”
Deidara: “AND SASORI! I’M SORRY FOR ALL THOSE TIMES I SAID I HATED YOU! I LOVE YOU DAMMIT!”
Sasori: -Blank face-
Kakuzu: “That was a bit much.”
Zetsu: “You know, if you guys wanna live that bad I have a drug that makes people forget stuff.”
Kakuzu: “AND YOU DIDN’T MENTION BEFORE BECAUSE-OH FORGET IT JUST GIVE ME THE STUFF.”
Zetsu: -Tosses him a vile-
Kakuzu: -Runs and shoves it down Pein’s throat-
Pein: “DIE-….. What the hell am I doing he- EW. Sasori, you like Tsunade? You’re fucking nasty.”
Kakuzu: -Crying tears of happiness- “We’re saved!” -Snatches his money from Pein- “Giving away my money, I must’ve lost my damn mind. Oh, and Sasori, if you mention anything I said, I’ll fucking kill you.” -Walks out-
Sasori: -Blank face, no movement whatsoever-
Pein: “Huh… Well, I‘m very confused right now so I‘m gonna go lay down and watch porn-I mean continue mourning my daughter“ -Walks out-
Deidara: “…So… I’m NOT going to die…?”
Zetsu: -Smiling- “Nope!”
Deidara: “…Well, fuck me…” (OH… Bad choice of wording…) -Runs like hell-
Itachi: -Runs into the room with a video camera- “DAMMIT! DID I MISS ANYTHING?!”
Deidara: -Running past him- “Nope, nope. Nothing at all.”
Itachi: “Damn… It figures. I always- UGH You like Tsunade? Dude, that’s sick.” -Walks out-
Sasori: -In state of shock-
Tobi: -Falls from the roof- “Did someone say Tobi’s a good boy?!”
TO BE CONTINUED…
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Comments: 166
THIS IS SOO AWSOME!
hey, in summer 2007, I made random stories like this (of course, not as good as yours), so if you could follow the link and tell me your opinion on it, please? It has 5 parts.
[link]
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"Pein: -Busts down the door, holding chainsaw- “HEEEEEEEEEERE’S JOHNY!” "
thanks for making me stain yet another pair of panties D:
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Your ruining all my undies!!
I demand compensation!!
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*Gives peace offering of pancakes and cookies*
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yay its up D D
HEEEEEEEERES JOHNY
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keep up the good work they are hilarious!!
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lol, HELOOOOOOOO CLEVELAND, LETS PLAY HIDE AND SEEEEK -Banging on the door- “WARRIORS~… COME OUT AND PLA~AY~…” “HEEEEEEEEEERE’S JOHNY!” “Huh… Well, I‘m very confused right now so I‘m gonna go lay down and watch porn-I mean continue mourning my daughter“ -Walks out- funniest fucking moments
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