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peterdawes β Smoke Rings in the Dark
by-nc-nd
Published: 2008-11-26 06:21:37 +0000 UTC; Views: 716; Favourites: 15; Downloads: 8
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Description
smoke rings in the dark.share a laugh with friends and lovers
and hide behind the painted smile.
this life is enough for several eras
and here i sit, an old manβs feet
slipped in a young manβs shoes.
a passionate being with a darkness that
could chill the warmest heart.
gone are the days of ignorance.
should not have known the taste of blood,
yet it drips from teeth designed to kill
night after unending night.
never should have known death
as its bloody executioner,
yet, here i am, the angel of darkness.
the dualistic creature; the yin and yang.
the martyrs all cast their lots against me.
the demons see fit now to disown me.
one half, an assassin, dressed in black.
the other, a saint, with a tainted soul.
this heart that feels everything and
nothing at all; it no longer beats,
yet it bursts from my chest,
shouting love and lies and heresies.
the gods of this age look down at me.
the sinners and saints all laugh and wonder
how long until the devil takes over.
how long until the belabored soul breaks.
without the love in this heart
and the love i adore;
the friends and the family
who hold me up high, i dare say...
this eagle would have already
fallen to the ground.
these knees would have already
given way.
but for now, it remains...
smoke rings in the dark.
a glass of scotch and a lit cigarette.
a cunning smile and an evil glint
inside emerald eyes and a blackened heart;
inside the mind of a prophet and the
soul of a lover. eternal years passing.
one day at a time, one grain of sand falls
after the other. until there are no more.
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Comments: 15
Another interesting piece. And is it just me or is there a face in the smoke?
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i loved it, dark and yet incredible all the same.
good luck on the poetry book peter, i hope ill be able to hold a copy one day!
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Very wicked, very dark yet so subtle. Unfortunately I see a hint of banality.
If you want to publish a poetry book, this poem needs to go through not an amendment or modification but a rewrite and envision it in a transcended and different way. You see, this poem of yours carries the traits of typical informal poetry. But if that is your intention, then go ahead.
All the best to you.
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I Love it! I had that sudden picture of an outlined silhouette in a darkened room looking down through patio doors from a high rise, with the city lights at night shining brightly and wispy tendrils of smoke rising up from a cigarette. What can I say I get visual impressions from your poems luv!
So you're going to adopt the format of putting various themed poems....Looks like a good idea! Are you going to put them in categories / sections with graphics at the beginning of each section?
I find your venture and the energy your exuding quite exciting!
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I absolutely love this poem. I cannot wait until your book is ready. Yay! Amazing introductory poem. I will definitely have to get your poem.
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ooo, such a classy book title. 
even though i don't smoke, and probably never will (because it's gross), i could really go for one right now. damn freaking 15 page paper i have left to write. 
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i also thought it was better than "angsty poetic rambling by a melancholy vampire."
i understand stress completely, dear. for you, i shall light a cigarette and smoke it in your stead.
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also better than 'some crap i write down when i'm all emo but i don't call it emo because i'm a grown-up and i could filet you if i wanted to so shut up and read this.' *snicker*
well, as long as you won't die from it. that's something i noticed about London and Ottawa. lots of smokers, and lots of French people. it's like the same darn city.
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i think i should borrow 'i could filet you if i wanted, so shut up and read this' as a subtitle, though.
no, cancer is not a threat. bad breath, perhaps, and maybe the smell of it on my clothing, but i make certain to use healthy amounts of mouthwash and cologne.
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