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Pyrox666xPheebs — 1. Introduction
Published: 2007-08-14 17:30:20 +0000 UTC; Views: 576; Favourites: 11; Downloads: 1
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Description
Welcome to my storyA life of words that rhyme
Truth be told its horror
Broke my grand design
My life is filled with wonder
Things of which I’m proud
But every drop that passes
Darkens my black cloud
I was banished once from heaven
To my earthly grave
A hell that’s wrought with demons
No angels came to save
So every thought that’s in my head
Spills upon this page
The message in my bottle
“Release me from my cage”
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Comments: 52
Back then.. it came naturally..
more to say it was a challenge NOT to rhyme.
Now however.. none rhyme comes more naturally.
So im sure that my new introduction will be as such
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Rate it ? hmmm.... 9
I missed something in the last line, which is the only thing that prevented you from getting a 10. On the other hand, I have a poetic obsession with last lines, so think what you will
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oooh thank you
honesty too 
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interesting theme but not one of my favourites of yours so a 6. i mean it's still great though!!
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No thanks for your Honesty
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Really!? Wow!!!` i thank you so much
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ur most welcome!
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Thanks ever so much
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You're very welcome
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neuf! nove! ... NINE! (only because nothing is ever perfect
Simply, I just love it
take care hun
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Aww thank you darling 
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Aww thank you darling
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Hmm..... 9.... Like always beautiful poem, and the flow was wonderful. ~
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I like this one, I would rate it a nine dear, the flow is great and i love the x,a,x,a rhyme scheme, and i happen to think the point is put out there far enough to understand, but still with drawn enough for a mystery. Very nice dear
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Thanks so much darling
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It is because it is such a great poem i am thinking
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Beautiful flow, even if a touch awkward in the last stanza for some reason - but wonderful rhyming structure.
I'd say...9
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I know what you mean about the last stanza... i wrote the first three first... but it didnt feel finished.. so i wrote that... Any suggestions?
Thank you for the 9
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Only one, maybe if you shorten the first line of the last one a little it wouldn't taste so clumsy on the tongue...
And otherwise, you're very welcome for the nine
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Ooo, I really do like this.
Especially the ending.
It uses fantastic imagery, and it's very moving.
Incredible.
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Thank you so much
You've said such nice things about my poetry
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They were well deserved!
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I'll give you a nine. ^^ I liked the overall flow, and the concept was a wonderful representation of not just yourself, but the whole human race. Great work.
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You're very welcome. ^^
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Hmmm...
7.
The flow was excellent, the meaning was beautiful but i think the meaning could be put a tad more In-Your-Face so thick people like me understand it better
x
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Your not thick !!! 
And thank you very much
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first thought: 10+++++
second thought: 8,8
it kinda looked like there was a rithm in this poem, only sometimes the rithm didn't seem to be right... and i thought this was a pitty...
but for the rest, really great... very beautifull
(sorry if the english was bad, but i can't thing very clear now)
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English was fine love
Can you point out where it went askew.. i wanna try and fix it
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it seems to change, the one time it does make sense and the other time it doesn't... but i meant this part:
So every thought that’s in my head
it think that sentense is to long or something, i don't know... i think it's just me that doesn't make sense, not this sentense...
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Yeah i see it
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try to make it shorter in some way?
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10! I f****** love it! One of the best emotional poems I've ever come accross, hit me like brick square in the head. 1000 faves if I only could...
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Wow 
Thank you
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thats a cool picca and it goes with the poem perfectly i would give it like an 8-9
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Wow
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no problem it deserved it <3
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