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Published: 2008-06-03 05:22:55 +0000 UTC; Views: 375; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 2
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Description
You were never taught the word help.It hadn’t been part of your vocabulary like everyone else; so you just sat there, with tears in your eyes, watching them walk by.
Some stopped and asked if you needed that word again – help.
You didn’t know what it meant.
You didn’t know what you needed.
You replied in a whimper – No.
Suns had set and rose and the tears fell like rain into the gutter beside you.
Your skin had become black with dirt.
Your clothes: more holes than material.
And your stomach growled with hunger.
Still you replied - No.
You fell asleep understanding you could no longer stay on the cold broken street.
Yet you didn’t know how to stop the way you lived.
You didn’t know how to turn to the people who walked right passed you and ask them for that word.
When you awoke the next day, you believed you had died.
You were warm in a bed.
New clothes draped your clean, replenished body.
People walked in and out, offering food, water… love.
They spoke words of comfort into your ears as you remained silent beside them, soaking in this new feeling.
They hadn’t asked you if you needed that word - help.
They hadn’t asked you what you wanted them to do.
They simply tried everything they could.
They knew the meaning of the word help,
And they knew you needed it.
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Comments: 22
insanity-streak [2008-07-06 00:06:26 +0000 UTC]
oh i love this! i love the way that it goes from not knowing help and saying no which is a nice contrast to know anyway to giving help!! it's such a nice idea too and so uplifting in the end which isn't common with your poems!!
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to insanity-streak [2008-07-18 22:03:45 +0000 UTC]
Haha too true
I suppose i hate doing all happy endings, when i feel i havent properly got mine, and in most stories there is always a happy ending.
But anyway, thank you
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arata75 [2008-06-03 13:15:59 +0000 UTC]
I like how it's written but could you please explain it to me? I didn't really understand the ending. -fave-
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to arata75 [2008-06-04 10:38:30 +0000 UTC]
Basically it's about not knowing what you need to feel happier, and not knowing how to ask for it.
It's about people asking you if you need help, feeling ' well i did my part', but not actually trying to help you, because sometimes you can't ask for help, or you dont see you need help.
In the ending it shows someone who is just giving someone else the help they can see they need, instead of just asking and walking away.
It';s difficult to explain lol... but does it make any more sense now?
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arata75 In reply to Pyrox666xPheebs [2008-06-05 01:09:31 +0000 UTC]
Oh yes, thank you. It's a beautiful poem and very well write. What was your inspiration?
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to arata75 [2008-06-05 01:15:57 +0000 UTC]
Just what i was feeling at the time... but kind of just made a story out of it
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MagicalJoey [2008-06-03 09:54:47 +0000 UTC]
This makes absolute perfect sense to me...100% perfect sense!
May I take the idea and try and turn it onto a poem?
Thank you for writing this.
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to MagicalJoey [2008-06-03 10:29:44 +0000 UTC]
Course you can
You needn't have to ask!
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MagicalJoey In reply to Pyrox666xPheebs [2008-06-03 19:34:52 +0000 UTC]
I always ask. Better to be polite.
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RockerByBaby [2008-06-03 07:55:16 +0000 UTC]
You arranged this prose in such an effective way that the readers can clearly feel what you aim to get across. It just....flows so well, and it works.
Great job, hon!
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to RockerByBaby [2008-06-03 08:03:49 +0000 UTC]
Thanks darling !
it was more of just a ramble really that i neatened up
But i wanted to try and make it into a story too
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RockerByBaby In reply to Pyrox666xPheebs [2008-06-03 09:39:20 +0000 UTC]
Ah I see!
It worked either way, hon.
Very welcome!
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alexs2602 [2008-06-03 06:11:22 +0000 UTC]
A new deviation at last!!
Well written as usual, remember i'm always here to help, honey!
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to alexs2602 [2008-06-03 06:18:11 +0000 UTC]
Hehe ^_^
Hopefully i can get into writing again.. but i dont know.
I know you are darling
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alexs2602 In reply to Pyrox666xPheebs [2008-06-03 06:26:14 +0000 UTC]
I think you should, it's a great outlet in my opinion and I feel like a hypocrit now because I havent written in ages either. I think I'll try to write something when i have a spare hour today.
Whatever you need...
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Pyrox666xPheebs In reply to alexs2602 [2008-06-03 06:37:44 +0000 UTC]
Yeyness be sure to show me first
xxx
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alexs2602 In reply to Pyrox666xPheebs [2008-06-03 10:34:40 +0000 UTC]
I've written something I'm gonna submit so I'll quickly note you it and then go down to the library(i'm at college) and either write another one or revise xxx
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