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Description
It's the series that launched a thousand YouTube careers, turned one man's depression into a multi-million dollar franchise and the reason why Markiplier and MatPat have any major form of relevance. I'm talking about Five Nights of Freddy's: Indie darling of 2014, or the YouTube algorithm's worst nightmare?

To coincide with the eventual release of the Security Breach DLC sometime in July 2023 (unless it gets delayed), I'm taking a somewhat satirical look at the mainline series of games, as Ann relives the horror of being near the one thing she truly fears: Animatronics... Oh, and Bonnie simping hard for her. I may do a seperate FNAF:I3POL down the road for the books and movie, but I'd need to actually read those. The only game I didn't add was Five Nights at Freddy's: Special Delivery, because I'm not sure if it has any impact on the main series. If it does, do let me know and I'll add it asap. Ruin will also be added to this I3POL when it comes out and I've reviewed it.

While some franchises like Call of Duty or Assassin's Creed really have to work hard to generate any form of hype, all FNAF has to do is upload a JPEG and every single neon-hair coloured “professional screamer” on YouTube will have about five videos discussing theories as to what it's all about. No offence, Dawko and 8-Bit Ryan. I do like your videos.

As I've said numerous times on the topic, I am a fan of this franchise and I do respect the series creator, Scott Cawthon. Looking at his success does give us all hope that we too can be worth $70 million if we put the work in. However, much like the Sonic franchise, just because I like something doesn't mean I'm gonna turn a blind eye to its bullshit.

I think the biggest problem with FNAF is that it doesn't know when to end. Several times Scott would put a clear ending to the story, only to undermine his own decision by bringing out three games afterwards. He's like the Hideo Kojima of the indie-circuit. So far, Five Nights at Freddy's has "ended" three separate times. The first being FNAF3, the second time being FNAF4 and finally Ultimate Custom Night was supposed to be the definitive end to Freddy and his never-ending entourage of band members. I have a strong bet with myself that Ruin will lead the way to FNAF 9 or 15. I'm not sure what we're up to at this point.

Say what you will about this franchise (and people have), but the original game is still the best thing in the entire series for it kept things simple, focused on the scares while having a vague enough story that left you wanting some answers down the road. I know my late friend, He11sing920, once described FNAF as “the modern version of Night Trap”, but I'm gonna have to respectfully disagree with him on that. The idea of taking pizzeria mascots, ala Chuck E Cheese, and putting a horror spin on it hasn’t really been done before. If you took the horror aesthetic out of FNAF, these do look like actual mascots from an old kids restaurant back in the late 80s or early 90s and that's what was so appealing about those original designs. Just a shame Scott forgot about that halfway through.

Where the series dipped in quality for me was with Five Nights of Freddy's 4, when Scott decided to add more teeth to these things than the entire Osmond family. I hold to the belief that Five Nights at Freddy's 3 should have been the definitive end to the story. The ghosts of the children got their revenge on the killer, their souls were finally laid to rest. End of story… Or so we thought.

Speaking of which, let's talk about the Purple Guy/Dave Miller/William Afton/Springtrap/Scraptrap/Glitchtrap/Burntrap or whatever we're calling him at the moment. I may be on my own with this, but I miss the days when this guy was just simply called “the Purple Guy.” It added a layer of mystique and suspense to this franchise that every time this 8-bit sprite showed up, it filled you with dread because you didn't really know much about him. Who is this guy? Why is he killing all these kids? How does he somehow cheat death after becoming Springtrap?

Then Scott started explaining things and it turned the character into a bit of a joke. He went from a mysterious child murderer, into a pizzeria restaurant owner, absentee father, roboticist, mad scientist and cult leader. The fuck? That's like finding out Jason Voorhees was really the co-founder and CEO of McDonald's and he built Robot Masters in his spare time.

There's also the issue of how he kept coming back for undeserved reappearances despite being dead. Unless your name is Dracula or Sigma, you have no excuse to keep cheating the Reaper like this. First, he died in FNAF3 when Fazbear's Fright burned to the ground. Yes, it's a bit ridiculous how he survived 30 years trapped in a spring lock suit with no food, water or oxygen, but whatever. Horror games gotta horror game I suppose. Then, he got burned alive with all the remaining animatronics in FNAF6 and was promptly sent off to Hell. That is where his story should have ended, but he somehow attaches his consciousness to a computer chip, gets reborn as a piece of malware that can brainwash human beings via a VR headset, and his victim just throws his corpse into a healing pod to revive him.

When Resident Evil looks at your plot and says “that's fucking stupid!” you know you've done something wrong.

I say that because this is supposed to be a series about pizzeria mascot's murdering people who apply for a security guard job. Now we've got crazy stuff like souls being converted into liquid that can power animatronics, digitised souls, corporations going to great lengths to cover up child murders and other cult-like nonsense. You had me at killer pizzeria robots, Scott. “Why’d you have to go and make things so complicated?”

Which brings us to the current state of the franchise as FNAF has become another one of those soulless franchises that has a yearly update, but all the creativity, drive and passion was extinguished a long time ago. Everything about Security Breach just screams corporatism, shareholder pleasing and bland designs that they should be in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It’s also worth noting that Five Nights of Freddy's has gone from an inspirational series, to the butt of a lot of people's jokes online.

I think the reason for that is because of how quickly sequels were being pumped out that gave everyone little time to breathe between instalments. In comparison, the original Resident Evil came out in 1996, while the much beloved sequel didn't arrive until January 1998. Five Nights at Freddy's 2 came out less than three months after the first game. Hell, this series had a full trilogy within a year of existing. Either these games were easy to make, or Scott did not understand the word PATIENCE. People just got tired of a new game being announced within weeks of the last one coming out. Yes, you'll still get those fans that queue up no matter what, while MatPat probably has sleepless nights rewriting his timeline idea for the 500th time.

The other major issue (and the one I lampshade in the comic) is the continuation of a story that ended with the third instalment. The way it could be salvaged is if they just declare everything after Ultimate Custom Night is a reboot or a brand new story. Start again with a new cast of characters with a new location and I think a lot of people wouldn't be that upset about it. Stop relying on Purple Guy to sell your franchise when that fucker should be rotting it hell at this point. Vanessa/Vanny from Security Breach should have been a copycat killer inspired by him, or a complete loon that likes killing kids if you wanted to keep that dark macabre atmosphere about the franchise. Then again, dark humour about murdering children probably doesn't sell Funko pops or a series of books now does it?

In short: You should end on a high note, because you may end up releasing Security Breach.

You know what the weird bit is? I still don’t know what kind of pizza Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza made?

Description
It's the series that launched a thousand YouTube careers, turned one man's depression into a multi-million dollar franchise and the reason why Markiplier and MatPat have any major form of relevance. I'm talking about Five Nights of Freddy's: Indie darling of 2014, or the YouTube algorithm's worst nightmare?

To coincide with the eventual release of the Security Breach DLC sometime in July 2023 (unless it gets delayed), I'm taking a somewhat satirical look at the mainline series of games, as Ann relives the horror of being near the one thing she truly fears: Animatronics... Oh, and Bonnie simping hard for her. I may do a seperate FNAF:I3POL down the road for the books and movie, but I'd need to actually read those. The only game I didn't add was Five Nights at Freddy's: Special Delivery, because I'm not sure if it has any impact on the main series. If it does, do let me know and I'll add it asap. Ruin will also be added to this I3POL when it comes out and I've reviewed it.

While some franchises like Call of Duty or Assassin's Creed really have to work hard to generate any form of hype, all FNAF has to do is upload a JPEG and every single neon-hair coloured “professional screamer” on YouTube will have about five videos discussing theories as to what it's all about. No offence, Dawko and 8-Bit Ryan. I do like your videos.

As I've said numerous times on the topic, I am a fan of this franchise and I do respect the series creator, Scott Cawthon. Looking at his success does give us all hope that we too can be worth $70 million if we put the work in. However, much like the Sonic franchise, just because I like something doesn't mean I'm gonna turn a blind eye to its bullshit.

I think the biggest problem with FNAF is that it doesn't know when to end. Several times Scott would put a clear ending to the story, only to undermine his own decision by bringing out three games afterwards. He's like the Hideo Kojima of the indie-circuit. So far, Five Nights at Freddy's has "ended" three separate times. The first being FNAF3, the second time being FNAF4 and finally Ultimate Custom Night was supposed to be the definitive end to Freddy and his never-ending entourage of band members. I have a strong bet with myself that Ruin will lead the way to FNAF 9 or 15. I'm not sure what we're up to at this point.

Say what you will about this franchise (and people have), but the original game is still the best thing in the entire series for it kept things simple, focused on the scares while having a vague enough story that left you wanting some answers down the road. I know my late friend, He11sing920, once described FNAF as “the modern version of Night Trap”, but I'm gonna have to respectfully disagree with him on that. The idea of taking pizzeria mascots, ala Chuck E Cheese, and putting a horror spin on it hasn’t really been done before. If you took the horror aesthetic out of FNAF, these do look like actual mascots from an old kids restaurant back in the late 80s or early 90s and that's what was so appealing about those original designs. Just a shame Scott forgot about that halfway through.

Where the series dipped in quality for me was with Five Nights of Freddy's 4, when Scott decided to add more teeth to these things than the entire Osmond family. I hold to the belief that Five Nights at Freddy's 3 should have been the definitive end to the story. The ghosts of the children got their revenge on the killer, their souls were finally laid to rest. End of story… Or so we thought.

Speaking of which, let's talk about the Purple Guy/Dave Miller/William Afton/Springtrap/Scraptrap/Glitchtrap/Burntrap or whatever we're calling him at the moment. I may be on my own with this, but I miss the days when this guy was just simply called “the Purple Guy.” It added a layer of mystique and suspense to this franchise that every time this 8-bit sprite showed up, it filled you with dread because you didn't really know much about him. Who is this guy? Why is he killing all these kids? How does he somehow cheat death after becoming Springtrap?

Then Scott started explaining things and it turned the character into a bit of a joke. He went from a mysterious child murderer, into a pizzeria restaurant owner, absentee father, roboticist, mad scientist and cult leader. The fuck? That's like finding out Jason Voorhees was really the co-founder and CEO of McDonald's and he built Robot Masters in his spare time.

There's also the issue of how he kept coming back for undeserved reappearances despite being dead. Unless your name is Dracula or Sigma, you have no excuse to keep cheating the Reaper like this. First, he died in FNAF3 when Fazbear's Fright burned to the ground. Yes, it's a bit ridiculous how he survived 30 years trapped in a spring lock suit with no food, water or oxygen, but whatever. Horror games gotta horror game I suppose. Then, he got burned alive with all the remaining animatronics in FNAF6 and was promptly sent off to Hell. That is where his story should have ended, but he somehow attaches his consciousness to a computer chip, gets reborn as a piece of malware that can brainwash human beings via a VR headset, and his victim just throws his corpse into a healing pod to revive him.

When Resident Evil looks at your plot and says “that's fucking stupid!” you know you've done something wrong.

I say that because this is supposed to be a series about pizzeria mascot's murdering people who apply for a security guard job. Now we've got crazy stuff like souls being converted into liquid that can power animatronics, digitised souls, corporations going to great lengths to cover up child murders and other cult-like nonsense. You had me at killer pizzeria robots, Scott. “Why’d you have to go and make things so complicated?”

Which brings us to the current state of the franchise as FNAF has become another one of those soulless franchises that has a yearly update, but all the creativity, drive and passion was extinguished a long time ago. Everything about Security Breach just screams corporatism, shareholder pleasing and bland designs that they should be in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It’s also worth noting that Five Nights of Freddy's has gone from an inspirational series, to the butt of a lot of people's jokes online.

I think the reason for that is because of how quickly sequels were being pumped out that gave everyone little time to breathe between instalments. In comparison, the original Resident Evil came out in 1996, while the much beloved sequel didn't arrive until January 1998. Five Nights at Freddy's 2 came out less than three months after the first game. Hell, this series had a full trilogy within a year of existing. Either these games were easy to make, or Scott did not understand the word PATIENCE. People just got tired of a new game being announced within weeks of the last one coming out. Yes, you'll still get those fans that queue up no matter what, while MatPat probably has sleepless nights rewriting his timeline idea for the 500th time.

The other major issue (and the one I lampshade in the comic) is the continuation of a story that ended with the third instalment. The way it could be salvaged is if they just declare everything after Ultimate Custom Night is a reboot or a brand new story. Start again with a new cast of characters with a new location and I think a lot of people wouldn't be that upset about it. Stop relying on Purple Guy to sell your franchise when that fucker should be rotting it hell at this point. Vanessa/Vanny from Security Breach should have been a copycat killer inspired by him, or a complete loon that likes killing kids if you wanted to keep that dark macabre atmosphere about the franchise. Then again, dark humour about murdering children probably doesn't sell Funko pops or a series of books now does it?

In short: You should end on a high note, because you may end up releasing Security Breach.

You know what the weird bit is? I still don’t know what kind of pizza Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza made?