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RavenfeatherForever — xWarrior-Catsx Contest entry
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Published: 2010-08-29 01:58:37 +0000 UTC; Views: 7754; Favourites: 190; Downloads: 15
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Warrior Cat Jokes, Contest Entry. Beware Of suggestive....things...xD--
Jayfeather: -perks ears when smelling a familiar scent- Hello, Cinderheart.
Cinderheart: Hey there, sexy.
Jayfeather: Excuse me?
Cinderheart: -pounces on Jayfeather- You heard me.
Jayfeather: If I'm sexy, mind explaining to me what I look like?
Cinderheart: A light gray tabby with baby blue eyes.
Jayfeather: Great StarClan, I AM sexy aren't I?
--
Spiderleg: -walks in with a kink in his tail-
Jayfeather: Spiderleg, can I help you with something?
Spiderleg: Why would I need help with something?! -fur bristling-
Jayfeather: Daisy's trying to rape you again, isn't she?
Spiderleg: ...
Jayfeather: -sigh- I'll go get the mouse intestines.
--
Jayfeather: Hey, Cinderheart, wanna hear a joke?
Cinderheart: -sits next to Jayfeather eyes wide- SURE!
Jayfeather: ... Firestar.
Cinderheart: -looks disappointed- I don't get it. -Tilts head-
--
Jayfeather: -hears caterwauling in the middle of the night- Great StarClan, what was that?
Cinderheart: Don't worry, it's just Ferncloud and Dustpelt...
Jeayfeather: And he wonders why he has a bad back.
--
Cinderpaw: Ugh! I hate this injury! I can hardly even walk! I wish I could ride on a warriors back so I could still go into the forest...
Jaypaw: You can ride on my stick.
Cinderpaw: O_O
Jaypaw: That didn't come out right...
--
Nightcloud: - I mean, what is your problem?!
Crowfeather: -looks bored- What kind of conversation is this?
Nightcloud: -continues to bitch- I mean come on! You chose me over her but you OBVIOUSLY love her more. You impregnated her with three freaking kits!
Crowfeather: - -_-'' - ...
Nightcloud: And how many kits did you give me?! One! ONE? COME ON- ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME CROWFEATHER?!
Crowfeather: -is snoring softly-
Nightcloud: Crowfeather, you will give me more kits whether you like it or not -goes and gets a sharp stick-
--
Thrushpelt: Great catch, Bluefur!
Bluefur: -is embarrassed- Erm, thanks
Thrushpelt: I loved that thing you did when you waggled your hindquarters, could you show me how to do it?
Bluefur: -awkward silence-
Thrushpelt: ...Yeah I think I'm gonna leave now
--
Jayfeather: Your fur looks so beautiful in the Moonlight
Cinderheart: -blushes under pelt- Oh Jayfeather.....YOU STUPID PIECE OF FOX-DUNG! I HATE it when you do that!
Jayfeather: -grins-
--
Whitestorm: -purrs- I love you
Willowpelt: -presses against Whitestorm- I love you too. And I always will
Whitestorm: The day I stop loving you will be the day that StarClan doesn't exist
Willowpelt: Aw, you are such a horrible flirt -purrs-
*Brindleface walks in*
Whitestorm: ...
Willowpelt: -coughs-
Brindleface: -is not impressed- Really?
Whitestorm: ... Can I explain?
Brindleface: Go ahead
Whitestorm: Well I...-
Brindleface: -walks away-
Whitestorm: Great StarClan, I'm dead
--
Bramblepaw: *jumps out of nowhere and lands on top of Firestar*
Firestar: Get off my you great lump
Bramblepaw: You didn't see me coming, did you
Firestar: *springs up and flings Bramblepaw into a tree* Bet you didn't see that coming either
Bramblepaw: Ow...
Firestar: Yeah, I thought so
--
Moonflower: - And I had the vole pinned under a tree root and- Stormtail, are you listening to me?
Stormtail: *is staring at Dappletail*
Moonflower: Can you look at your mate for once?
Stormtail: I am
Moonflower: ...I give up
--
Sandstorm: Firestar, did you ever notice how Graystripe seems to hit on all the gray tabbies?
Firestar: What do you mean?
Sandstorm: Silverstream was a gray tabby
Firestar: Yeah,
Sandstorm: Millie is also a gray tabby
Firestar: -facepalm- wow
--
Brambleclaw: Squirrelflight is mine, Ashfur!
Ashfur: Nu-uh! She is mine.
Brambleclaw: No
Ashfur: Yes
Brambleclaw: No
Ashfur: Yes
*Stormfur sitting across the clearing watching*
Stormfur: -sigh- So much incest going on these days…
--
Jaypaw: -goes into random cat's dreams- Hm..I need to find an interesting one. –Stops above Leafpool- I wonder…
*Voices coming from a distance in a grassy plateau-
Leafpool: Y-yes, like that! Keep going!
Crowfeather: Are you sure I shouldn't do that thing I did when I got you pregnant? –Looks seductively at Leafpool-
Leafpool: Ohhhh, yes please! –purrs-
Jaypaw: …..O_O sometimes I wish I couldn't see other cat's "Dreams"
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Comments: 316
awwww..... i already finished it.....
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What? Aw, it's okay! Before you upload describe to me what you drew
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jayfeather sitting. his paw is on tawnypelts. she is crouched and their noses are touching. she says, "Oh Jayfeather..." and he says "Shh. Don't move. Don't speak. I just want to feel you there."
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Hmmmm... well, okay, I am not a supporter (oh god!) but I always like to make crack pairings so post it up! Seriously, I make 3 crack pairings like every day Todays 3: JayXTawny LionXTawny CrowXTawny, tawny was clearly the subject! XD
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okay! I shall look forward to it!
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Read my comment and answer on that one
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lol I'm guessing the third one is pretty much like:
"Guess what!"
"What?"
"MICHAEL JACKSON!"
"
...Yeah....
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Jaypaw: You can ride on my stick.
xDDDDD
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i love the fifth one XD but i don't get the ninth D:
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well whitestorm and brindleface had kits ten he went off with willowpelt
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do you know who were the kits?
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brindle white: ashfur ferncloud white willow : sorreltail, rainwhisker, sootfur
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i see ^^ thnx
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i feel bad for jayfeather o_o no one wants to see that 'dream'.
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LOL!!
Cinderpaw and the stick! 
This is definitely a
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Lmfao! These jokes are priceless! Hope you win. xDD
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rofl that was really funny nice job!
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These are really funny XDD
I love the Firestar joke, and the one when Bramblepaw gets flung into the tree, and the Crow and Night conversation, and the one when Jayfeather says ''You can ride on my stick.'' ..... ''That didn't come out right....''
They're really funny, all of them XD
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I didnt get the incest one...*looks innocent*
but the others were hilarious!!! i wish the erins werent so plain with the language in the series. it would be AWESOME if jayfeather was called sexy. :iconimapervplz:
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incest= love between relatives, i believe it is illegal in the us though xD
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i know what incest means! but none of them are related....
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brambleclaw is squirrelflights second cousin and ashfur is her uncle
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well sandstorms mother is brindleface, erin hunter made it official, so that makes sand and ash siblings, so there is that
then tigerstars mom and redtail are siblings and redtail is sandstorms dad, so there is that
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e_e....oooooo I see your point....
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Okay. It was really funny. However I didn't get jokes numbers...
2, 7, 9, 11 and 13.
Everything else, Hilarious.
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2 was kind of an odd ball, the whole mouse intestines kinda leaves you like "O_O erm...whats he gonna use them for?"
7 was thrushpelt hitting on bluefur in a perverted way (ouldnt understandif u havent read Bluestar's prophecy)
9, well whitestorm had brindleface's kits, then he went off with willowpelt x3
11, stormtail is mates with moonflower, and he is in love with dappletail and staring at her and he kinda slipped up and said dapple was his mate (another bluestars prophecy thing)
13, brambleclaw is squirrelflights second cousin and ashfur is her uncle, so yeah, lots of incest xD
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wait how is he her second cousin ?
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tigerstars mom and redtail are siblings and redtail is sandstorms dad, so there is that
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Redtail's siblings were Spottedleaf and Willowpelt. Goldenflower's sibling was Lionheart.
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2.) Okay. ...awkward!!! XD XD XD
7.) I'll get on it!!! *runs to library*
9.) Omg! X3 No way! I thought Brindleface and Redtail were mates! X3
11.) Holy cheese~! >.< Why are all these things in that book! Must get...NOW! XD
13.) Actually, I was just wondering what incest meant. I kind of knew that they were all related~! XD
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9) they were with sandstorm, but whitestorm was ashfurs father
13) incest is love between people who are related which is illegal in the us i believe xD
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9.) Omg! XD No way! XD He's totally sleeping around! XD
13.) Omg! XD I was thinking that but I wasn't sure! Omg! Gross! XD XD XD Omg! There was a comic about that once! XD It was funny!
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the Thrushpelt-Bluefur one made me laugh.
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ha ha ha XD the last one was AWESOME!
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