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Published: 2012-07-30 10:11:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 210; Favourites: 2; Downloads: 0
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Our bodies contain about 9.5 pints of blood. It pulses through our veins non-stop, running free like a river 24/7. But this substance is not only alluring to bats, mountain lions, and other predators --- it calls to other creatures, worse creatures; creatures you can't even imagine. Our blood calls to them, pulling them closer until they can't resist any longer.
Now, at this point, you're probably saying that you'd stay away, you'd never see these creatures. But they have ways of stalking unnoticed into society and humanity. Well, partly unnoticed.
From the beginning of their existence, they've attracted their prey with their unnaturally good looks. They have the ability to stun you beyond the function of thought. And not only that, but their eyes. If they live off human blood, their eyes are a deep black --- a cryptic abyss. And when they are in "the mode", it's even worse.
At this moment their eyes are as red and fluid as as the blood they are about to drain from your enticing veins --- bright red eyes that pierce through your very soul. But the most terrifying part is that it's their choice. Yes, there is another way.
. . . It's just helping them find it that's the problem
© Copyright 2008 Willow Raven (UN: thethrill at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Comments: 16
IntricateSunlight [2012-08-28 15:12:58 +0000 UTC]
Interesting, very interesting. Reminds me, I need to finish up my vampire story x.x
Though it's not quite like this probably...
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-28 15:48:55 +0000 UTC]
Yay! You read!
Thank you. I'm trying my best to avoid a Twilight comparison, but it's kind of hard when you're writing from a teen girl's view that can get annoying at times (because that's the type of character she is) and you introduce a male vampire. (Which, by the way, Everett is NOTHING like he seems. You see how he really is later.) So don't let the first few chapters ward you off. It's supposed to be very light-hearted until the dramatic mood-change in Chapter Five.
YESH! You must continue! I can't wait to read it!
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IntricateSunlight In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-28 18:16:01 +0000 UTC]
Ok. I will try to get around to reading every single chapter, you're like on the top of my 'to-read' priority list so yes, I WILL read it.
I am doing the same (trying to avoid a Twilight comparison that is), however mine is not from a teen girl's point of view and is in 3rd person.
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-29 00:03:45 +0000 UTC]
Trust me, Rosette changes, though and everything gets a lot more somber. The real plot of the story is truly nothing like any of my readers are expecting, and it's also the reason for the title.
Yay! Aw... Don't feel obligated.
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IntricateSunlight In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-29 15:47:27 +0000 UTC]
Ok. Eventually I'll read it all x.x
Yay, now I know the MC's name :3
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-29 16:30:11 +0000 UTC]
Lol. I thought you had already read to Chapter Two.
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IntricateSunlight In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-29 16:31:24 +0000 UTC]
No, only about half of it >->
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-29 16:47:56 +0000 UTC]
Lol. I don't blame you. I apologize for how long it is. I really didn't realize. Just get ready for 4 and 5, then. They're longer. XP
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-29 17:05:37 +0000 UTC]
It's just because I see so many super-short chapters. I actually thought mine weren't long enough. But I guess posting them up on a site makes them really long.
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IntricateSunlight In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-29 17:45:10 +0000 UTC]
I try for at most the size of a minimum short story, being around 1500 words at most. Keep in mind, these are chapters it's ok if they are shorter.
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Reprogrammed In reply to IntricateSunlight [2012-08-29 17:51:02 +0000 UTC]
True. There's a difference between actual novel chapters and ones that you post online. These I've made novel length so that they'd fit on pages about 1/3 the size of a Word document.
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IntricateSunlight In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-29 20:02:07 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, I noticed that those are novel length. >->
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MusicianInTraining [2012-08-01 19:48:20 +0000 UTC]
Oooo...this definitely spiked my interest!
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Reprogrammed In reply to MusicianInTraining [2012-08-01 19:50:03 +0000 UTC]
Yay! The beginning line was actually a writing prompt. I saw it and I was like, Dude, I could totally start with that! Then it eventually became the preface for this.
Thanks!
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MusicianInTraining In reply to Reprogrammed [2012-08-01 20:09:00 +0000 UTC]
Well, I like it. It definitely caught MY attention! You're most welcome!
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