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RvBOMally β Almost the Caliphate
Published: 2016-12-19 03:43:55 +0000 UTC; Views: 9431; Favourites: 73; Downloads: 112
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This is a cover of QuantumBranching 'sΒ Almost the Caliphate , a funny tongue-in-cheek take on Kratman's Caliphate. I've mostly kept to what Bruce established in his version, so read that for details. I shouldn't have to say this, but keep the discussion to the scenario itself and remember that it's not meant to be taken seriously.ΒRelated content
Comments: 53
So why didn't New Palestine join up with the Caliphate? Also, is the Islam of the Caliphate separate from the Islam of the Muslim states that don't recognize the Caliph?
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They didn't want to be part of some crazy caliphate, I guess. I would guess that Islam in non-Caliphate aligned states would have a rather poor view of the Caliph.
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1. What is the Republic of China's government like?
2. Which bloc is the most powerful?
3. What's the story behind the Uzbek Empire? Islam Karimov's daughter deciding that she'd like to become Empress instead of President?
4. What are the South Indian states like?
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Please stop asking "what is X like?" questions.Β
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Can you believe that Kratman was actually nominated for a Hugo award?
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Wasn't that when the polls were being stormed by that "Something Puppies" agenda-pushing group? If it happened then, I'm not surprised.
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That's a typo. I'll change it.
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Still got that weakness to "evil American Imperium" stories.
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Ironically, the Americans were meant to be pretty clear good guys in the original book instead of just one more evil.
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Actually, from what I remember of the book itself the US isn't portrayed as in a particularly rosy situation. The American characters know they live in a military dictatorship that violates people's liberties and does some horrible things, but they think it's necessary.Β
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Funnily enough, if Bruce went down that route, I wouldn't find this nearly as interesting. I'm a sucker for evil vs. evil.Β
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What's your opinion on Kratman's Caliphate?
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I haven't read it, so I can't judge it.
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Kinda funny given that there is a current attempt to establish a Caliphate and Bruce's original map was used to mock those who thought that might happen.
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When ISIS started exploding through the Middle East, I thought I was living in some airport fiction world, because it is the sort of "random Caliphate" that future history prior to ISIS have show up at some point. I don't think they'll be anywhere near as successful as their fictional counterparts, and I hope it stays that way.Β
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Yeah it's kinda crazy. Makes you wonder which ones of these have a larger chance of happening than the althist community assumes.
Ameriwank: Probably not, but we never know what MAGA might entail.
America Collapse: See above. Also see all the harebrained attempts at instigating Civil War 2 currently ongoing.
Rise of the Happy Lucky Red Lotus Golden Dragon Thingy: Hey, if Russia, with a GDP the size of Spain, can get into the clay conquest mood ...
The United Evil Caliphate of Wherever It Is: Haha yeah about that.
Soviet Union 2.0: Welp.
Eurowank: See: The rise of the Remove Kebab International.
Eurabia: Probably not, but there are already de facto Islamist-run enclaves in certain European countries.
Random Balkanization: Scotland wants to try again.
World government: Genuinely impossible at this point.
China and India unify to become Voltron: India can into SCO.
The Commonwealth of Nations gradually recreates the British Empire: Brexit.
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It's kinda funny considering most Islamic groups and governments don't call themselves Caliphates, resorting to Islamic Republics/Emirates or Kingdoms despite the fact that those countries have more power to do so.
Usually most Islamic Caliphate scenarios would require them to be pretty much left to their own devices without US/Russian(who are in a little Deus Vult phase) intervention. The only way they could be successful is that the US pretty much completely pulls out and say F You to the Middle East and Syrian government forces completely collapse. Unlikely at this point.Β
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Mocking those who anticipate a _European_ Caliphate. But hey, what's a different continent among friends?
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To be fair, this was before the migrant crisis, who knows what's going to happen in the future considering it looks like Β France is going to elect someone from the Euro-Skeptic camp of the National Front, and other things Β as well.
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Well to be fair, a European caliphate looked a hell of a lot more likely (such as it is) before 2016.Β
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Hey, once you've seen one part of Afro-Eurasia, you've seen them all, right?
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AlternateHistory.com. You will never find a more wretched hive of snark and smuggery.
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It's certainly very echo chambery, which is what I dislike the most about that community. I find the discussions in the community here more interesting. There are enough interesting works and people on the site that I stick around, but I have contemplated moving here permanently.
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I remember this one really cringey timeline once that was kind of an alt-1984. It had an evil racist Objectivist Christian Dominionist Totalitarian USA (contradictions? where?) facing off against super-ISIS, some sort of continental European empire of the "Nazis-with-the-serial-numbers-filed-off" variety, and a multicultural socialist republican British Empire. It was like an experiment to confirm all of their readership's biases at once.Β
AH.com is so completely devoid of self-awareness that it's funny rather than sad. The map threads are very good, but it's not the kind of site you go to if you want to expand your horizons.
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While very cringe-inducing, that actually sounds kind of fun to map. Do you recall the name or something that could help me find it?
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Nah, it was in one of the map threads, circa 2012 or so.Β
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That actually sounds like something I'd make, but naturally the British would actually be just a Stalinist shithole that thinksΒ it's a multicultural socialist paradise.Β
Yeah, I just stick to my corner of the site.Β
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What are the Republic of China and the Greater Republic of Turkey like nowadays?
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Kratman's "Caliphate." Ahhhh, that takes me back. Kratman's just about the only writer I've ever heard of who can take a space marines adventure story premise and make it unbearably boring.
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you can almost smell the 2004 on his stories, can't you just?
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I haven't had the pleasure of reading his work, and from what I've seen, I don't think I will. Boring is about the worst thing you could call anything in my book.
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I got Caliphate for free and I still feel like I got ripped off.
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Tom Kratman's website is the finest literature he's ever produced . Seriously, how can you not love a General Ripper impersonator who makes all his best hate-mail available on his website's homepage?
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Always nice to see SOMETHING good salvaged from the insane tower of wingnuttery and shoddy world building that is The Krat!
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I haven't read any of his work, and I don't think I ever will. From the sounds of it, he's the kind of guy who shoves his politics directly into his work, and that's something I can't stand.Β
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I don't know, apart from "green."
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Likely the EU ring of stars on a green background with an Islamic crescent in the center of the ring. If you're feeling really edgy, maybe just the EU flag with the shahada in the middle of the ring.
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I considered the possibility, but the EU flag actually uses Christian symbolism.
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Wait, it does?! I thought it just represented the different peoples of Europe?
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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_β¦
It's one interpretation, but if I were in charge of some European caliphate, I would change it.Β
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Well you know, Muslims think very highly of Mary, too. Jesus is an important prophet in Islam, and Mary is beloved as his mother (interestingly, they also believe that Mary was a virgin, just like Christians). They're also the only religion apart from the Catholics who believe that she was born without sin and taken body and soul into Heaven at the end of her life. Many Muslims and Christians alike make pilgrimages to Mary's alleged final resting place in Ephesus. And then there's the apparition of Our Lady of Zeitoun.
So if we're considering the EU flag as Marian rather than more specifically Christian symbolism, then I'm not at all certain that many Muslims would object to it.
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