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Silverlion — In...
Published: 2005-08-12 23:25:02 +0000 UTC; Views: 119; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 1
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Description
In silence I sit weepingtears strem from my eyes
In shadow I rest shaking
aching for warm as my spirit dies
In sorrow I blow away
ash upon the wind
For all I have ever been
is nothing.
In sunlight I shiver with
chills my soul pained and rent
In starlight I dream alone
of a final truthful end
In sadness I remain alone
no one to my wounds to tend
In silence I die
In shadow I die
In sorrow and
sunlight and
starlight
I die
for sadness is all that
remains as the world
washes away.
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Comments: 6
it's well written, but I think you should move one word to the next line: (move "with")
"In sunlight I shiver
with chills my soul pained and rent"
it seems to flow better then, but the rest of it flows really well.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Thank you.
Good idea. I will try that.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
wow that's a sad poem...
but nice work bud...
hope you'll feel better soon... and good luck wif the hearing...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
That's good. *hugs* It's beautiful. It has emotion and shows it...great job.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
