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skyOrange โ NotHere
Published: 2001-07-31 23:31:17 +0000 UTC; Views: 424; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 28
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of pains twisting,moving,
(a loss, creating emptiness)
within.
love gained,
and love-stained.
fleeting,
leaving.
loving behind.
/gone.ruthjacob.july'01/
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Comments: 17
Again with the exquisite brevity. I'm starting to get into your groove. The emotions here are their own imagery.
~aesta
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[link] | [link]
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i/you tear a piece of (my) heart
i'm gone, i've played my part (in your play)
farewell.. goodbye.. my love.
just scribbled this after thinking about your poem.. figured i'd share
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These short poems really do rock.
So simple yet so beautiful.
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hmm.. i think i was right you seem to grasp what lies beyond us and stretch it down and into wonderful words.
and.. you do wonders with format. kudos on that, it's far less suffocating
-dspayre-
uh oh..
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im coming back to this poem. i loved it the first time and i love it even more this time. means a lot more now. thanks for this.
:meglocrush: https://meglocrush.deviantart.com
(im not as eem as you think i am)
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Simple yet very powerful. I love this one ruth, you explain so much with so little words. Very very well written and thought out. *hands ruth a bag full of peanut shells*
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yes, those who leave do leave their love behind, a love stain, the only thing that it's in our heart and mind not on the floor,
beautiful thought, it really strange isin't it, after someone we love leaves, their love stays with us forever, just one thought, just once we think on them, and a smile...
rajiv--
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i fell into the distance in between the words and my heart became stranded..it is so difficult to see you drawn into hours of emptiness, but somewhere in this, i see there emerge a crucial sense of awareness..and it is tending to this that helps you grow and create "rare gems"..~
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I sense that you like to leave your writings very open for interpretation.
- u - b - u -
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You're probably one of the rare people that can say so much in so little.
Great job as always. I truely _love_ your poetry
Make.shift*
http://www.makeshift.ca
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I can only say that this is beautiful, Ruth. Anything else would sound hollow
.:they call me woozie:.
~wooziefied~
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I'm really at a loss here. I want to leave the kind of beautiful, endearing, heartfelt comment that this poem deserves, but I'm left with nothing to say. I'm left sitting here with a dumb look on my face, searching for something to cut through the pain and touch a strand of comfort, but I have nothing - except this dumb look on my face.
"(a loss, creating emptiness)"
(four words, creating awe)
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Ooo, I suppose you already know that I read this when you posted it. I read it 3 times and started to comment, but I couldn't because it was just so hard to see this thing envelope you again, hear your sadness and your pain. I think that your sound in this is like a long low moan of loneliness and these are anguished and powerful words. I hope this emotion is less strong for you tonight.
*ยฏ`*ยท.joy.ยท*ยฏ`*
ps: Oh, Ruth, did you ever hear Lucinda Williams sing "Right in Time"? She sings that song the way this poem reads. Oh, lordy, it will not make you feel better but you can sing along and maybe...you could give this awfulness to that song....i feel helpless sometimes....
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words hereare cut into shreds and do the same thing when read. very nice.
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absolutely gorgeous flow,
- get deviot http://www.epic7.com
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"loving behind" - beautiful phrase. see, syntax is powerful. great work
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white space empty
glowing with memory
hollow but without regret
why there's always two
there's a me and a you
nothing in between
things are distinct and unmelting
in a forest of ideas and pain
sing the refrain:
there's a me and a you
nothing in between
....
notHere: another rare gem from the one and only sabine1
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