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wilnet1tractor [2020-01-03 16:28:57 +0000 UTC]

I sexy maidshark.

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Luna-the-Zekrom [2019-09-19 15:24:16 +0000 UTC]

Hello!  I’m here from with some constructive criticism.

First of all, I like the color scheme of this piece.  The pale yellow background works well with Alluria’s combination of blue and pink, while her dark hair, eyes, and clothing provide some nice contrast with the otherwise pastel color scheme.  I also like how you used more vibrant hues for the shading instead of using a duller/darker version of the colors.

However, I was kind of confused about what’s going on in the picture, which wasn’t clear at a first glance.  It took me a little while to notice that the bubbles with the other characters inside them were pointing to little specks on Alluria’s leg, indicating that they’ve been shrunk down to near-invisibility.  If I were you, I’d make all that just a little bigger and move it out of the corner (maybe widen the canvas a bit) to make the shrunk characters more prominent.

The fabric in the magnified bubble also looks strange to me, because I couldn’t immediately place what it was supposed to be.  I think it would be more recognizable if you used cross-hatching to depict the fabric texture instead of a bunch of lines going in random directions.

In regards to the text in Alluria’s thought bubble, I would add a comma after Kelly’s name, and then some kind of punctuation at the end of the sentence.  Either ellipses (since the thought isn’t finished) or an exclamation point (to indicate urgency) could work, or maybe even both.  But as it is, the end kind of falls flat, since the lack of punctuation makes it look unfinished.  

You might also want to consider separating the text into two different thought bubbles.  In a written story, I would have Alluria think "Where are they?" and then start a new paragraph when the thought occurs to her: "Oh no… Kelly, you better not have…!"  While these two thoughts are related, they’re distinct enough that switching from one to the other in a single block of text feels a little sudden.

The anatomy looks mostly good, but I think there are a couple of things that look slightly off.  First, Alluria’s arms and hands look a little small, especially compared to her legs.  Secondly, the chests on all of the characters seem oddly separated from the rest of their bodies.  I think it’s because you put line art and dark shading underneath their breasts, while in real life there would not be such a sharp distinction.  Their clothing would not bunch underneath the breasts, but rather curve over the breasts in one smooth line.  For lack of a better comparison, they should look more like hills (or a bell curve), but on a vertical line instead of horizontal one.  (I hope that description makes sense, because I honestly don’t know how else to phrase it.   )

One more thing (which is unrelated to the picture itself, but it has to do with the presentation of the piece): I also poked around your gallery a little bit and figured out that this image is part of a series of drawings with the same theme/storyline.  I would suggest putting links in the description to any earlier images in the same continuity to avoid any confusion.

Overall, I like the idea of this piece and think you did a great job with it.  I had a lot to talk about, but as you can see, my suggestions are mostly just little tweaks for the sake of presentation.  If you have any questions about my critique, please feel free to ask!  And keep up the excellent work!

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Burke23 [2019-08-17 02:17:59 +0000 UTC]

Coolio

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JustAnArtExpert [2019-08-16 22:20:34 +0000 UTC]

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Sir--Raptor [2019-08-12 17:50:34 +0000 UTC]

I think payback will rhyme with splish.

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