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Published: 2009-12-10 02:51:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 2951; Favourites: 33; Downloads: 8
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Chapter 1I clutch my mother's hand as she walks briskly to the town square, pulling me along behind her. I was stumbling as she pulled me along due to the ridiculous outfit she had made me wear. It was far too small. It hugged my slender frame so tightly I could hardly walk in it. When I had asked my mom if I had to wear it she simply replied that "I had to look nice just in case." I however don't see the logic in this. If I'm going to be a meal for a monster, does it matter what I look like? But I know better than to argue with my mother. I run a few fingers through my white hair. My red eyes look up at my father.
He is walking on my other side his face just as grave as my mother's. I'm not as worried as them though. This was only my first year in the lottery, what were the chances I would get the black dot? As we enter the square, I can see all the other children and their parents crowed around the mayor who was holding a black box. The black box seemed fairly average but what made this one special was what was inside it.
The box contained one piece of paper for every child in the village between the ages of 14 and 16. I had my fourteenth birthday only last month. So this was the first year I had to be here, but as I said I wasn't worried. My brother Titus had lived through all of his three years of eligibility and he had told me not to fret about it. "The chances of you getting picked are a hundred to one" he assured me.
My mom comes to a stop at the edge of the crowd. I stop as well, but my mom pushes me forward. I make my way through the crowd to the front, next to the other kids. Robin motions me over and I walk to him. We don't talk however, it's just not the time, but I'm sure as soon as the tribute is picked we will be chatting up a storm. We had been friends since our first year of school. He had been the first one to look past my outer appearance and befriend me.
Like many boys in the town of eternal glow he looked like his name. His hair was a soft brown, like the feathers of his namesake and his eyes a golden auburn, like the chest of that noble bird. He was Perhaps my only true friend in town. Despite the fact he had a habit of disappearing whenever the bigger kids came to pick on me for my birth defect.
The crowd goes silent as the mayor signals he is ready to begin. There's a lot of formal stuff at the beginning. I tune it out, instead I begin thinking of what I'm going to do when I get home.
After the speech the kids file into one neat line, oldest to youngest. Robin and I are near the back. One by one we take a piece of folded paper from the box.
I grab mine and head back to where we were standing. We have to wait for the signal to open them. Robin comes over to me he looks like he just saw a ghost. The pressures of the lottery must have been getting to him.
"You ok?" I ask.
"Yha, I just feel like mine is bad luck" robin answers. I roll my eyes, he's so paranoid.
"If you feel so bad about it why don't we switch?" I suggest. I reason that it's just as unlikely robin got the dot, so it doesn't really matter. Robin looks at me like he can't believe his ears.
"Uh ok... Thanks Silvain!" he stammers. We switch papers.
"Ok, everyone you may open them now!" the mayor announces.
I casually open mine and look at it. My legs turn to jelly and I forget how to breathe. On mine there's a small black dot. I stare at it disbelievingly, I look up at robin and he looks back at me guiltily.
"I'm sorry Silvain..." he apologises. He knew! He bloody knew! He must have peaked at his before, that's why he said his was bad luck. I open my mouth to say something, anything, but the others around me have seen that I have the dot. They are moving away from me like I have the plague.
"Ah! Young Silvain Baker, come up here please." the mayor says. I find myself alone in a part in the crowd, even robin has abandoned me.
My legs feel like wood as I walk up to the platform. I feel slightly dazed like this is all just a bad dream and I'm going to wake up soon but no such thing happens as I walk to what surely must be my death. Once I mount the steps I look back at the crowd. I spot my mother. She's crying in my father's arms. I swallow trying to dislodge the lump in my throat. At the top of the stairs, I'm met by the mayor's secretary. She gives me a sympathetic hug which I barely feel, before leading me to my seat on the stage.
"Ladies and gentle men" the mayor begins. "We are gathered here today to sacrifice this young soul to the grate lord Damian. It is a terrible price to pay but it is a necessary to preserve the safety of our town, as we all know. We all took the chance when we were this age, and like many others this boy was just unlucky." unlucky? Stupid more like. I shoot an accusing glance at robin he just stares at the ground.
But a thunder clap brings back my fear. It was not just any thunder clap. This one was the one that accompanied the entrance of the great vampire. I clutch the arms of my chair as the sky darkens and the storm closes in. suddenly the midday light is gone, to be replaced with eerie darkness. My ears twitch as they pick up the faraway sound of flapping wings.
Just then the sky opens and three creatures drop from the havens. A thump is heard throughout the square as they land cat-like on the stage. The three figures straighten up. Black bat-like wings folding into a neutral position on their backs.
Now that I'm close enough to get a good look I can finally see what they look like. There are two males and one female but I know strait away which one is Damian. My brother had described him as a demon with pitch black hair, blood red strips and eyes that would scare off the devil at twenty paces. His skin was lacklustre and pale, not unlike my own. But when you looked at his face your eye was quickly drawn to his lips, which were a dark black. Not unlike those of a corpse. The being standing in front of me matches the description perfectly. I guess the others must be members of his clan.
Damian's demon eyes scanned the crowd. Moving from frightened face, to frightened face, till they rest on me. My blood turns to ice in my veins as he examines me.
"Good evening lord Damian." the mayor greets. A very noticeable tone of terror in his voice. Damian ignores the mayor and heads strait for me. My heart skips a beat as he comes closer. When he's within arm's reach, he extends a hand. My breath stops in my throat as his fingers touch my cheek. To my surprise his hand is warm. I expected his touch to be as cold as ice. My eyes flit up to his, and then I
know I'm lost. I can't look away from his blood red eyes. My fear, my worries, everything is lost in his eyes. Something in the back of my head recalls what my brother said about vampires. "If you ever get in a vampires hands be sure not to look into his eyes, if you do he will be able to control you." Oh well, too late now.
"Would this be the tribute?" The female asks cynically. I see her only out of the corner of my eye they are still locked into Damian's.
Her hair is long and split in the middle, one side black the other purple. She was clad in a gothic looking dress complete with a tight corset and long loose sleeves. The look on her face is one of distaste. As if I was unfit to be food for a dog. She opens her mouth once more to put her feelings into words adding; "he looks ill of pallor, he must be unhealthy!"
"Silvain is an albino, but I assure you he is as strong as any boy his age." The mayor reassures her.
The female opens her mouth to argue the point but Damian interrupts.
"He will do..." the female shuts he mouth quickly.
"All the same master, does not thou think that one would taste him before committing?" the other male suggests.
"Indeed" Damian agrees. His eyes never brake from mine. "Get up." I hear his command but his lips didn't move. Never the less I obey him. Automatically I stand from my seat. Damian smiles and comes closer till my chest is touching his. He lowers his head to my neck. I can feel his breath on my neck as he looks for the artery. My eyes look out at the crowd. Not really seeing the terrified look on my mother's face as she looks on.
My eyes shut tight as I feel sharp fangs bite into my flesh. I wait for the pain, but it never comes. I can feel his teeth in my neck but it doesn't hurt at all. The teeth draw back and his lips close round the wound. Then it begins. I can feel the blood being sucked from my veins. It feels so weird but at the same time I feel a strange tingle in my hips. A warm feeling I had never felt before. Who knew dying could feel so good? But just as it began it ended, I almost felt sorry that it hadn't lasted longer.
Damian steps back and licks his lips, removing a few drops of stray life force. He nods at his companions they nod back and take to the air. Damian looks back at me. This time I'm carful to look away from his eyes.
Suddenly in one fluid movement Damian laced his arm round my chest and takes to the air. My stomach jolts and my eyes snap shut. My sense of balance in thrown off and I think I'm going to puke for a second as we rocket into the air. Damian holds tight to me as he falls into an even wing beat.
When I finally screw up the courage to open my eyes the town I lived in my whole life is only a speck in the distance. A few tears fall down my checks but there quickly wiped away by the wind.
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Comments: 43
SilverStarKitty [2011-06-22 22:27:52 +0000 UTC]
AWSOME that was an amzing story can't wait for the next one
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
VioletisBlue [2010-02-05 09:38:32 +0000 UTC]
I love your openings to stories.
I can see many similarities between this, and the one you are having me read, regarding the township's traditions, the main character, and even the connection between Silvain and Damien, compared to that of Silver and Shadow.
This one is very well worded, you've done a great job expressing your ideas, and you've done a good job going into detail. The first paragraph had me hooked.
Now a couple of gripes I have.
Spelling errors again. Still your weak point I see.
Also, the part about him losing all his feelings when he looks into Damien's eyes is a little cliche, and I have a feeling I know where it is leading. It is very similar to what you wrote in Chapter 4 and 5 of your other story.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to VioletisBlue [2010-02-06 16:50:55 +0000 UTC]
Thank you very much I glad to so I’m improving! All but the grammar anyway…
Man I never thought they were so similar maybe I should modify the story line?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
VioletisBlue In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2010-02-06 22:40:57 +0000 UTC]
If you want.
It's really not my choice about what you're writing about.
I'm just pushing you in a direction of grammatical godliness or something like that xD.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to MomokoKazume28 [2010-01-09 04:24:34 +0000 UTC]
thank you!
i will.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
UchihaKurai0oa In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-10 23:09:18 +0000 UTC]
No, I thanks YOU! I loved it! ^-^ Are you going to update it?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to UchihaKurai0oa [2009-12-10 23:20:03 +0000 UTC]
yha, sometime today I just need to finish my lousy editing.
ah well.. better I at least try to iron it out..
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
UchihaKurai0oa In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-10 23:21:01 +0000 UTC]
Tell me when you put it up, please! ^-^
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to UchihaKurai0oa [2009-12-10 23:23:55 +0000 UTC]
isn’t that typically what deviant watches are for?
But ok I will.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
xtheamazingnothingx [2009-12-10 17:38:36 +0000 UTC]
Ahh! Keep writing it was good! Now I gotta find and read the old one... *slinks away*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to xtheamazingnothingx [2009-12-10 23:07:25 +0000 UTC]
No need to get you knickers in a knot. it still the same story I just changed the characters a little bit.
You won’t find the old version I got rid of it. I cant have the same chapter twice..
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Shadowin-Hedgehog [2009-12-10 12:15:43 +0000 UTC]
*immagins my cousin Damion as a vampire* O___O
No matter the characters i still love this story!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to Shadowin-Hedgehog [2009-12-10 23:09:22 +0000 UTC]
Just be thankful your cousin isn’t named Edward XD
Yha me to~ I just wanted to make it more original
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Shadowin-Hedgehog In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-11 12:13:12 +0000 UTC]
lmaoooooooo
I know i guy named Edward but we all call him Ed lol
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to Shadowin-Hedgehog [2009-12-12 04:28:16 +0000 UTC]
Mha, it’s a common name at least he doesn’t sparkle hun?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Shadowin-Hedgehog In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-12 19:05:47 +0000 UTC]
lmaoooo i asked him once if he sparkled and he went "god no!" lol
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
hearbeat [2009-12-10 10:34:20 +0000 UTC]
I like this!
Please do keep writing!
I want to know what happens next!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to hearbeat [2009-12-10 23:10:17 +0000 UTC]
thank you~
don’t worry I will
stay tuned I can’t wait to knock your socks off!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
TeamIceChaos [2009-12-10 05:23:53 +0000 UTC]
Wowwwww, I love vampires!
I haven't read the old one, so i'm completely hooked! ><' Write more! Write more!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to TeamIceChaos [2009-12-10 23:12:20 +0000 UTC]
Oh rly?
(fair warning this story is going to be nothing like twilight. Think romantic Dracula )
I have! I have! Just need to edit~ (like always XD)
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
TeamIceChaos In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-11 06:13:07 +0000 UTC]
Yeah really! You jus' got to add even MOAR description!
It's great you've made it your own novel rather than a fanfic.
Meh. I hoped it wasn't going to be like twilight anyway.
Yay dracula!
Yaaaaay! Can't wait
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to TeamIceChaos [2009-12-12 03:46:06 +0000 UTC]
Ok, I will!
Yha I just wanted some practice with original works but not to stray too far from my usual type of style.
Yes ! Yay Dracula
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-10 03:24:06 +0000 UTC]
n so it starts! ^w^
so im guessing well start seeing the new dialect of urs in action soon? cuz that "thou" was kinna random there :\
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-10 03:46:55 +0000 UTC]
unhun~
yha I am~ the idea is that’s how all the vampires communicate it’s a way of showing respect.
Rly? Man I knew a should have made the other comments more rhythmic…
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IblisTrigger451 In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-10 03:52:33 +0000 UTC]
yea that wudav helped but as u said - baby steps
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-10 03:56:02 +0000 UTC]
Yha, I so used to everyone knowing all the characters and not having to explain them and having some back-story they all know to fall back on..
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IblisTrigger451 In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-10 04:02:43 +0000 UTC]
ah XP im sure ur not the only one its hard to describe everytihng without getting it too muddled
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-10 04:06:24 +0000 UTC]
Yha XD making up whole worlds is sometime like that. That and making your characters realistic.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IblisTrigger451 In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-10 04:11:12 +0000 UTC]
mary sewages cn take a lesson from that
jk jk ...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-10 23:15:44 +0000 UTC]
My trick is never base a character after yourself, and always be slightly sadistic with them. let life kick them in the balls occasionally.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IblisTrigger451 In reply to Tangerine-Catnip [2009-12-13 05:28:34 +0000 UTC]
yep! well id say u cn base them a little bit off urself when u write from experience, n some mary sues get kicked in the balls TOO MUCH ...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Tangerine-Catnip In reply to IblisTrigger451 [2009-12-13 17:42:52 +0000 UTC]
I suppose so, just don’t make them exactly like you.
Yha but there’s a difference between being emo and tragic and just getting the harsh end of the stick
👍: 0 ⏩: 0