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TotallyTranslucent — Hope
Published: 2009-04-20 02:28:53 +0000 UTC; Views: 290; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 4
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Description The steamy water
Overhead
Pours down and hides
The tears I shed

They’re tears of sadness
Tears of rage
But also hope of
Turning the page

The tear that’s different
From the rest
A bird escaping
From the nest

But its little wings are
Much too weak
I watch it plummet
I can’t speak

But you can hear
My silent cry
Catch the tear before it
Leaves my eye

And as hope is saved,
Bird takes flight,
The tear reflects the
Newfound light

Your smile lifts me
Higher still
You touch my hand
I feel a chill

Then the warmth of you
Envelops all
And I know you’ll never
Let me fall
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Comments: 13

Eve-Francesca [2009-05-31 00:02:11 +0000 UTC]

This is beautiful! I LOOOVE it! Fantastic job, hun!!

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PerpetuallyLuminous [2009-04-22 00:24:02 +0000 UTC]

I READ THIS IN SCREAMNIG PENS OMG I LOOOOOVE THIS ONE

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TotallyTranslucent In reply to PerpetuallyLuminous [2009-04-27 03:16:41 +0000 UTC]

yay thank youuuuuuuuuu!!!!!

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Fuzzle-wit [2009-04-20 21:47:27 +0000 UTC]

Aw, that was so sweet! I love the transition from the sadness of tears to the warmth and protection that comes from the other person stepping in to catch the tear. I also really like the way the tear is compared to a little bird. Wonderful job!

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TotallyTranslucent In reply to Fuzzle-wit [2009-04-27 03:15:23 +0000 UTC]

yay thank you!!! my mom read it andwas like "what the heck i dont get it." im glad someone appreciates my attempt at metaphor.

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Fuzzle-wit In reply to TotallyTranslucent [2009-05-02 15:15:03 +0000 UTC]

Aw, well that can happen; sometimes people don't see the metaphors or the ideas that you're trying to convey. But hey, that's what it's all about, right? Interpretation.

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TotallyTranslucent In reply to Fuzzle-wit [2009-05-10 17:53:13 +0000 UTC]

ya. hey sorry for being away for so long....i actually think thats the longest time ive gone without a computer....like almost three weeks or something!!!

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Fuzzle-wit In reply to TotallyTranslucent [2009-05-11 02:52:41 +0000 UTC]

That's all right; we all have bouts in which we're away. Glad you're back! <3
I think the longest time I was away from my computer was about 6 weeks or something O___O It was horrible!

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TotallyTranslucent In reply to Fuzzle-wit [2009-05-26 03:55:10 +0000 UTC]

lol nice. sigh. it happened again. sigh. i have over 100 deviations to read...

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Fuzzle-wit In reply to TotallyTranslucent [2009-05-30 22:11:34 +0000 UTC]

Wow, over 100? That's quite a lot! Good luck sifting through them all! =\

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beautifulmindhazard [2009-04-20 02:36:51 +0000 UTC]

I like it to, great job!

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TotallyTranslucent In reply to beautifulmindhazard [2009-04-20 02:58:04 +0000 UTC]

oh! yay thank you!!

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beautifulmindhazard In reply to TotallyTranslucent [2009-04-20 22:59:07 +0000 UTC]

you're welcome!

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