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Abfc — A Day in the Life of a Penis [NSFW]
Published: 2008-07-08 05:43:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 34918; Favourites: 328; Downloads: 253
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Description Once upon a time, there live an abnormally large penis who..

..ate a bowling ball. He then became thirsty for..

..a bucket of cheese coated walrus juice. But that wasn't enough..

.., for, you see, this penis was half werewolf and..

..lived a secret double-life as Harry Potter. The penis was..

..in love with Paris Hilton, in spite of her affection for many other penises, but..

..the abnormal large penis knew that Paris could see him for the..

..ungodly oversized ballsack he possessed; however, she still..

..refused to have passionate orange sex with the penis. This drove the penis..

..to homosexuality, from which vantage point he started hanging out at..

..Starbucks. Where all the happy perverted tiny..

..child penises were left unattended by their caffeine-high parents, so he..

..latched onto one of them, but to his surprise..

..the little penises had vaginas, which caused him to..

..reverse-fap quite rapidly. This gave the penis terrible carpet burn and so..

..he resolved to eat one of the baby penises, resulting in..

..massive heart-burn that spread to all the other penises in the vicinity, which caused..

..them to all simultaneously vomit their white fluids onto eachother. Then the policeboobs arrived and..

..began dancing to the macaroni. "Wingardium Leveosa!" yelled the harry potter penis..

..before he promptly pierced the boob's nipple with his wand and..

..caused it to fly off and land on the policeboobs. Where it then turned into an abnormally purple..

..orange. Yes, an abnormally purple orange. This orange was regular size, but it vibrated and..

..began to engulf the flock of penises is it's purple-orangeness. The penises orgasmed frantically..

..transforming the purple orange into a white one--a sticky white one--but they were not done yet, for..

..along came a much larger white--sticky white--orange. It then appeared to..

..buttrape the first orange, making it white on the inside until it was no longer an orange at all, but rather..

..a manbearpig. And one handsome manbearpig at that, the penises frolicked around the manbearpig and..

..begged for the privilege of sucking his bearpig cock and maybe fondling his manballs. This angered the manbearpig, however, and..

..caused the manbearpig to erupt horrible white lava. It spilled all over Starbucks until..

..the manager inevitably took it and started selling it as a new type of iced drink. It sold millions and swept the nation..

..they even won a nobel peace prize! But all was not well in Kansas..

..BUT WHO GIVES A FUCK? "Screw Kansas," said the penis, while he..

..did just that, and attempted to rape the small farm town. But alas it was far too large for..

..him to feel anything, his cock only being the size of a large mansion. Annoyed, he decided to..

..thrust his invisible pelvis in the faces of all the leaders of the world. Including the very seductive..

..Barbara Bush, also known as George Washington, but soon his eyes melted and his cock deflated. Defeated, he..

..decided to move to Mexico, where nobody judged anybody of the size of their genitals. This is where the penis..

..met the love of his life: a disgusting and unkempt pussy. They..

..started a family together; full of many abnormally orange vagina.

The end...? ಠ_ಠ
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Comments: 861

Abfc In reply to ??? [2009-08-23 06:10:58 +0000 UTC]

dat ass

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

RS-Kyra In reply to ??? [2009-08-22 09:02:28 +0000 UTC]

*laughs until blood comes up*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to RS-Kyra [2009-08-23 01:42:30 +0000 UTC]

k

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Kaana-Chan In reply to ??? [2009-08-10 00:55:51 +0000 UTC]

Epic win XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to Kaana-Chan [2009-08-10 02:54:39 +0000 UTC]

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Kaana-Chan In reply to Abfc [2009-08-10 02:56:11 +0000 UTC]

-hands over key to the internet- Here you go. Congratulations, you win at life 8D

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Abfc In reply to Kaana-Chan [2009-08-10 03:01:13 +0000 UTC]

Awesome, thanks.

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Kaana-Chan In reply to Abfc [2009-08-10 03:04:40 +0000 UTC]

Why of course.

Your avatar is very original, by the way. I love it.

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Abfc In reply to Kaana-Chan [2009-08-10 03:06:13 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. ^snowmask was magnificent enough to make it for me.

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Kaana-Chan In reply to Abfc [2009-08-10 03:14:23 +0000 UTC]

Well, that was very nice of her. -nods sagely-

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xXTragiccXx In reply to ??? [2009-08-02 04:07:59 +0000 UTC]

agagagagaga im diein hahaha loved it such a dramatic storythank god i gots a vag its pretty lazy.. but when its NOT THE ADVENTURES are epic lmaooooooooo



fapfapfap lobsturrrrrrr

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to xXTragiccXx [2009-08-02 06:07:01 +0000 UTC]

Spell dying right kthxgtfobai. :3

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xXTragiccXx In reply to Abfc [2009-08-03 05:19:32 +0000 UTC]

i will try

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Riolulu In reply to ??? [2009-07-12 04:07:53 +0000 UTC]

hehehehe I am so smart now!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to Riolulu [2009-07-12 05:21:26 +0000 UTC]

No.

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Riolulu In reply to Abfc [2009-07-12 19:04:25 +0000 UTC]

No.

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Abfc In reply to Riolulu [2009-07-13 03:17:51 +0000 UTC]

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Riolulu In reply to Abfc [2009-07-13 17:08:03 +0000 UTC]

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aliceinwinterland In reply to ??? [2009-06-30 15:41:25 +0000 UTC]

Youve got quite an imagination, cracks me up !!!! lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to aliceinwinterland [2009-07-01 06:11:33 +0000 UTC]

thx lol

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grimsbloody In reply to ??? [2009-06-25 20:26:04 +0000 UTC]

LOL.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to grimsbloody [2009-06-26 05:56:23 +0000 UTC]

thx

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grimsbloody In reply to Abfc [2009-06-28 22:19:45 +0000 UTC]

you're welcome.
You're very... creative.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to grimsbloody [2009-06-29 05:33:19 +0000 UTC]

thx

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

lacyfay [2009-06-02 02:52:07 +0000 UTC]

I thoroughly enjoyed that story, but I fear my appetite for oranges will never return..

Starbucks, on the other hand, will not be ruined by the misfortune (or not?) or their popular new drink. I would totally buy it..

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to lacyfay [2009-06-02 06:12:00 +0000 UTC]

I'd pay double price for that new drink, were I not so poor.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

lacyfay In reply to Abfc [2009-06-02 16:08:51 +0000 UTC]

lol, same!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

daitan-na In reply to ??? [2009-05-09 19:43:04 +0000 UTC]

i was laughing my ass off for everyline that came up next, that was really hilarious

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to daitan-na [2009-05-10 06:25:58 +0000 UTC]

I AM GLAD YOU LIKED IT, GOOD SIR OR MA'AM.

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awesomeashley In reply to ??? [2009-04-15 01:53:48 +0000 UTC]

that was seriously the funniest thing i think i've ever read. i was cracking up.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to awesomeashley [2009-04-15 04:51:49 +0000 UTC]

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awesomeashley In reply to Abfc [2009-04-16 01:02:43 +0000 UTC]

?

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deviousdarkheart [2009-04-07 04:16:30 +0000 UTC]

What really got me was "Yes, an abnormally purple orange."

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Abfc In reply to deviousdarkheart [2009-04-07 05:00:53 +0000 UTC]

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fangurl1244 In reply to ??? [2009-03-31 00:51:29 +0000 UTC]

by the time I got to harry potter I was,

and then I got to raping Kansas I was all,

That was hilarious ^w^

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to fangurl1244 [2009-03-31 03:32:29 +0000 UTC]

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fangurl1244 In reply to Abfc [2009-03-31 04:11:47 +0000 UTC]

xD

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destinyduck [2009-03-27 21:58:12 +0000 UTC]

LOL!

Haha XD

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Abfc In reply to destinyduck [2009-03-28 03:20:59 +0000 UTC]

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james-vines In reply to ??? [2009-03-26 05:08:54 +0000 UTC]

(\_/)
(O.o)
(v_v)

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to james-vines [2009-03-26 05:12:16 +0000 UTC]

k

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xtaylorannx In reply to ??? [2009-03-14 21:13:35 +0000 UTC]

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Abfc In reply to xtaylorannx [2009-03-15 03:24:25 +0000 UTC]

k

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Kur0gur0jii In reply to ??? [2009-03-01 02:03:21 +0000 UTC]

SO FUCKING FUNNY AND RANDOM BY THE 5TH LINE JUST STARTED LAUGHING ON HOW RANDOM AND STUPID ON HOW A PENIS LIFE IS!! HAHAHAHAHAH! PENIS!
~~~~~~0000000~~~~~~~~0000000
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Abfc In reply to Kur0gur0jii [2009-03-02 05:53:18 +0000 UTC]

lolpenis.

So reported.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Kur0gur0jii In reply to Abfc [2009-03-02 21:48:04 +0000 UTC]

WHAT?! YOU HAVE THE TIME TO LOOK AT A TEXT PECTURE OF A PENIS THAN COMMENT ON IT??? THAT SAYS ALOT!
OH! YOUR NAME ABFC> IM GONNA GUESS WHAT IT MEANS IF ITS AN ANYGRAM LIKE ABDC(americas best dance crew)
ABFC= AMERICA'S BEST FUCK CREW!!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to Kur0gur0jii [2009-03-03 04:41:40 +0000 UTC]

It says I'm gay, lol.

But then, a lot of things say that, especially the 40GB+ of gay porn on my computer.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Kur0gur0jii In reply to Abfc [2009-03-03 21:59:11 +0000 UTC]

WOAH! MY FIFTH GUESS WAS RIGHT!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

laichixxbug14 In reply to ??? [2009-02-21 03:01:41 +0000 UTC]

thTASSA HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Abfc In reply to laichixxbug14 [2009-02-21 06:17:59 +0000 UTC]

lol

👍: 0 ⏩: 1


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