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BacktoBass β Off the Cuff - coloured.
by-nc-nd
Published: 2011-08-07 06:48:27 +0000 UTC; Views: 1108; Favourites: 36; Downloads: 3
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Description
Somehow even hotter in colour, if that's even humanly possible. UNF!Even in colour, Murdoc's still (C) Damon Albarn and Jamie Hewlett.
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Comments: 83
Not enough people call him that, I know he'd love itΒ
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He's adorable!
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Rrrrgh...don't look so smug, dammit, those aren't police grade!
*quietly dies inside of hotness*
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Hahahaha! At least they don't have any kind of leopard print or fluff ornamentation. That would be just too twee for words.
To be honest? I think I'd be tempted to play. LOL.
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I can actually see him being totally fine with hot pink leopard print cuffs...NEVER MIND WHY!
*fake gasp* Reeeally? Hahahaha, no SHIT!
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No shit. And no fluffy pink leopard print either, LOL. Now LEATHER... that's another thing entirely....
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No one said fluffy...well painted metal is what I had in mind. The picture I have in my head of them is totally obnoxious, but I like having little touches of that around me here and there.
Murdoc: *pinches* What about here?
There too...
Murdoc: Aren't you going to turn this into another...thing that the two of you do?
No. We've got quite a few going as it is.
Murdoc: *shakes head* No stamina...
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Thinking exactly the same, Hell my dear one. :hugs:
I'm in chat if you are up for it?
Murdoc: *growling* So now you two are gonna TALK about it too? *hopeful leer*
Fyns: That's up to Hell, Murdoc.
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I'm up for it! Already in!
Murdoc: *moan*
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Hahahahaha! Stick around, Bass man, you'll hear better than that...
Murdoc: *groan*
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Sometimes me and Fyns are up alllllll night...
Murdoc: *crosses legs* Now you're just being cruel.
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Hell? Shall we get out the scented oils, giggle a lot and do each other's hair?
Hell: Mmmm. Maybe. My arm's still a bit sore
Well, let me rub it for you - I did a fair bit of massage training when I was younger...
Murdoc: *faints*
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Hell: I guess you win this round.
Fynsie: *adds a tally mark on her side of the Overloading Murdoc's Circuits Note book* You'll get him one day.
Hell: *glances at her empty slot putting the book back in her jacket* I'd probably feel worse about this if it were anyone else. *smiles anyway*
Fynsie: Awww.
Murdoc: *rousing* KISS HER!
Hell: *ultra startled* ACK!
Murdoc: *whips a grungy memo pad out of his back pocket and puts a tally mark down*
Fynsie: What's that?
Murdoc: My counts of putting her through the ceiling. They're both ME, of course, but one side's for sex.
Fynsie: *snerk*
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Fynsie: *giggling* I love this, HARD
Murdoc: Yes, you dooooooooooo, don't you?
Fynsie: *floating*
Murdoc: *makes another notation in his book, laughs*
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Hell: *from her place with claws holding her in the ceiling* I hate you.
Murdoc: You love me.
Fynsie: *still floating, heart fluttery sigh*
Murdoc: Wonder which of you will drop first?
Hell: *releases her startled kung-fu grip and dives at him* ME!
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Murdoc: *neatly steps aside*
Hell: *landing gracefully on all fours* I'll give you a three second head start.
Murdoc: Now why would I run from YOU, Hellish?
Hell: Because I'm going to up my own tally for "making Murdoc sorry"
Murdoc: *scoffing* Pfft! Like how?
Hell: *holds up set of handcuffs, scrub brush and industrial abrasive cleaner* Bathtime.
Mudoc: *bolts*
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Hell: *utilizes her fencing skills* Not so FAST! *lunges and punch jabs Murdoc in the back of the knee with the hard part of the brush*
Murdoc: *falls* GYAH! *fights* Mad BITCH!
Hell: *taking advantage of him being on his stomach* Pick-UNF! Of the litter, JACK-OFF!
Murdoc: *kneed in the kidney* AUGH! It's not fucking happening!
Hell: YES IT IS! Come quietly and GET IN THE TUB!
Murdoc: *gaining leverage* I NEVER come quietly! *throws me off, pins*
Hell: Fuck! Nnf. That's why you keep getting kicked out of places. Huff.
Murdoc: *panting* I don't know what I'm going to do with you.
Hell: You know WHAT, just not HOW. But.
Murdoc: But.
Hell: Lemme give you a bath first. You like that tobbaco clove and bergamot scented oil I have right? Mix it with glycerin and there you are- man wash.
Murdoc: Hmm.
Hell: *trying a convincing smile* It'd be an honor to serve.
Murdoc: When you say it...it sounds like you're planning my murder.
Hell: Who...me? *failed attempt at Bambi eyes*
Murdoc: *horrified at the resulting psycho stare* STOP DOING THINGS WITH YOUR FACE.
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Hell: See? It's not so bad, right?
Murdoc: *reclining, drink in hand, having his back scrubbed* I'm sure this would be more enjoyable if I wasn't actually secured to the damn tapwork.
Hell: *sweetly* You aren't needed anywhere for a little while, this takes priority. Besides, it's nearly end of month, you'd be doing this anyway.
Murdoc: But did you have to throw me in here fully clothed?
Hell: I noticed the new Levis. That's how you get your jeans to fit best - soak in them, then walk around in 'em and let em dry. They fit to you like a second skin afterwards, perfectly moulded to your body shape.
Murdoc: Look, Hellish, my undercarriage is NOT going to tolerate being in wet denim for half a day.
Hell: Why not? Are you likely to go mouldy or something?
Murdoc: CHAFING, you idiot!
Hell: I do NOT know how you guys walk around with all that. Well, actually I do. *remembers changed-sex spell fiasco* But there were other advantages....
Murdoc: *rumbling* I seem to recall you enjoying quite a few advantages. Half a box of tissues and a whole bottle of lotion, if I remember correctly, heh heh heh.
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Hell: *face heats* I...didn't think you'd see that.
Murdoc: *swigging* Mm. I see everything.
Hell: Hmm.
Murdoc: It's rrrrrrrrreally too bad, you know. You missed out.
Hell: I did no such thing. You know I tried, but...there was just no way.
Murdoc: *sinks* Your loss. Still.
Hell: What.
Murdoc: You rrrrrreally should've returned the favor.
Hell: I know, dammit- I just couldn't!
Murdoc: Sexual discourtesy is one of my pet peeves, Hellish.
Hell: Well there's nothing I can do about that NOW. Besides, isn't it enough that I missed out on having guy to guy dealings with you? If I thought you'd have done it, I would've gone that route sooner.
Murdoc: *remembers, internal* She never DID clean the bathtub...shit. *out loud* I just bet, you little pervert.
Hell: Learned from the best. Raise up a bit.
Murdoc: *raises* Ooooh. Now that felt nice n' nnnnnnnnnasty.
Hell: Insert joke riffing on juxtaposition of being physically clean and mentally dirty here.
Murdoc: Speaking of insertion...
---
The future is NOW! Can't wait to see how we handle an RP that references another unfinished one. I am UP TO THE CHALLENGE!
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Hell: .... there'll be none of that. You know electrics don't mix with water.
Murdoc: Suit yourself. Bloody well feels like you are right now anyway.
Hell: *primly* I'm just making sure you're well, you know, spotless.
Murdoc: Getting ideas for afterwards, eh, my little - HNG!
Hell: Shit! Where'd the soap go???? *gropes around on bottom of tub*
Murdoc: *tightly* NOT THERE. AIM HIGHER!
Hell: Whoa, it's really wedged in there...
Murdoc: *clenched* This is taking the cleanliness thing a bit too far!
Hell: Oh man up!
Murdoc: FEELS LIKE THERE IS ALREADY!
Ahhahahahaahah! We freaking break every boundary there is, why stop now?
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Boundaries? *holds up her sledgehammer* WHAT boundaries.
---
Hell: *gloves on* Fark, slipery little! Geezus, it's really in there!
Murdoc: Nnnf- it's-fuck! You're only pushing it FARTHER!
Hell: How did you do this on ACCIDENT-I think I might get the tongs, actually-uht? Are...are you blushing?
Murdoc: It's the hot water and alcohol!
Hell: Bullshit. It's barely 85 degrees, and you've only finished HALF your beer.
Murdoc: Just shut up and-!
Hell: *grinning*
Murdoc: If you don't wipe that fucking look of your fuh-face-
Hell: Now, now. *clicks silicone tipped tongs* None of that.
Murdoc: Where the fuck were you keeping those?
Hell: The emergency kit. You didn't think I'd give you a bath without being prepared, did you? Speaking of prepared...*takes out petroleum jelly, coats the tongs*
Murdoc: Look, if you'd just uncuff me, I could-
Hell: Oh, you could. But I won't let you. Hands and knees, please.
Murdoc: *complies* I hhhhhhhhhate you.
Hell: You love me.
Murdoc: *groans*
Hell: Relax, boss. Think of England. And try not to shit.
Murdoc: *panting, moaning* I'll-huffff...fucking-hannh....I'll fucking kill you.
Hell: Oh please. Not like I'm treading on foreign ground here. Remember all those times you made me check you for colon cancer? *looks down* Hahah, yeah you do.
Murdoc: Nnnnnnn...
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Hell: Look, stop clenching, will you?
Murdoc: I CAN'T!!! You've got a set of metal tongs within a hair of my goolies, I'm restrained and worst of all, I'M FUCKING SOBER!
Hell: *grinning* Yeah. It's worked out nicely that way, hasn't it? '
Murdoc: *growling* Just fucking get ON with it!
Hell: OK, I think I've got it - now to just.... ease it out...
Murdoc: Oh dear Christ, this is so wrong.... hngnnggngngngn
Hell: Annnd it's slipped back in again. *giggles*
Murdoc: GET A GRIP, WOMAN!
Hell: I thought I HAD! It's SOAP, you know! It's meant to be slippery, and soft and .... *starts musing*
Murdoc: I'm going to melt these fucking cuffs down the minute you let me out of here. Nnngnnnnn.... GET IT OUT!
Hell: Oh good. We can get some PROPER ones then. Alright, last go *takes decisive action and secures the soap* OK, boss, you can relax now, all done.
Murdoc: Oouuuuhhhhh, you can forget anything ELSE you meant to do with soap right now!
Hell: *breezily* Ah but I have the man-wash right here and you're also coincidentally right here. Ready, as it were.
Murdoc: *pausing for a heartbeat* Drop the tongs first, Hellish
Hell: *complying*
Murdoc: Now you're talking *is suddenly taken in hand* Hngnngngngngng....rrrrrrrrr
Hell: And now you're not. *laughs*
Hell:
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Murdoc: Nnnnnnn-
Hell: *grinning* Didn't I say I'd take care of you?
Murdoc: *through gritted teeth* Stop that.
Hell: Hm? Oh, sorry. You not being able to move freely just brings out the worst in me...*grins wider*
Murdoc: Listen you opportunistic little trollop, I've got one hand free and a tub full of water standing here so cut the shit!
Hell: Pff. FINE. *gropes around in a pocket and finds the key, unlocks him* Happy now?
Murdoc: *yanking a handfull of my shirt*
Hell: YEEEEEEP! *splash*
Murdoc: Yes.
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Hell: *gasping* You shit!
Murdoc: I NEARLY did, but somehow, I held back. Now, however, I have no intention of doing do. *starts peeling off your wet clothes*
Hell: I suppose I should be happy you're not doing anything more violent- EEEK!
Murdoc: *brandishing tongs* Now, let's talk about bringing the worst out...
Hell: *thinking fast* Impossible. Nothing you do is anything less than sterling! Besides, what can I do? You'll only win. *sighs and closes eyes* Alright, get it over and done with! *lip wobbles*
Murdoc: Awww... kitten. Actually, you look like a drowned rat.
Hell: *gives him spaniel dog look*
Murdoc: You have to take all the fun out of it, don't you? If you beg me to forgive you I jusssssst might.
Hell: That's not going to happen and you know it.
Murdoc: Aaaah, but I have ways of making you talk....
Hell: No, you always want me to shut up - mmmphhfff!
Murdoc: Well whaddya know. Your gag reflex training is paying off....
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Hell: *flailing in horror* MLBMBHPBMBHHBPBMBMBBMMM!
Murdoc: *catching water in the face* I should keep you down there, but at this rate we'll both drown. *lets me surface*
Hell: *spitting out filthy water, gasps for air* MURDOC WHAT THE FUCK! Huff!
Murdoc: You had that coming.
Hell: *ultimate disbelief* Your FOOT! WENT IN MY MOUTH!
Murdoc: Yes. Yes it did.
Hell: YOU PUT YOUR FREAKING FOOT IN MY MOUTH!
Murdoc: We've established that, awhawhaw...how'd it taste?
Hell: Bad enough that I'm tempted to scrub my mouth out with your shit soap. *scrapes her togue with her nails* AUGH, IT'S NOT GOING AWAY! Ohhhhh,damn, damn dammmmiiiiiiiit! It's gonna stay in my mouth until I DIE! Everything I eat from now on will be accentuated with the rancid flavor of your toenails! *gasps, deadpans* I can never eat again.
Murdoc: Aoww, come on now, it's not-
Hell: *incoherent with the horrible idea* TOENAIL ACCENTS! Mmp! *turns over the side of the tub, barely pushes clothes out of the way before she starts retching* B-! Bleagh!
Murdoc: Oh, now you're just being melodramatic.
Hell: *flopping into a limp heap* Killllllll meeeeeeeeeee...
Murdoc: *nose in the air* Not until you apologize.
---
HA! I finally got it in! I've been waiting for that line to drop for AGES!
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Hell: *whimpering* I'm ruined! Ruined for life!
Murdoc: We've established THAT already as well, heh heh heh.
Hell: STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR COCK!
Murdoc: I will if you will. *smugly* Impossible, therefore, I'm safe.
Hell: *groaning and pawing at your mouth with the corner of a towel* It's... sticking!
Murdoc: Oh stop it. Just go and gargle something!
Hell: What? Listerine? Plax? NOTHING will get rid of this!
Murdoc: *holding up can of Coca Cola* Just don't swallow any. Stuff's like an oxyacetylene blowtorch on the palate.
Hell: *snatching at the can and swilling at it* - gargling noises - *spits into the bathtub* Oh Gah, it's working! *repeats the process*
Murdoc: DO YOU MIND?
Hell: *in between mouth rinses* If it helps me, it'll help at the damn source!
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Murdoc: *reaching over to let the water out* You'll give us both acid burns that way, girl.
Hell: *smacking* It worked though! Ahhh, sweet burning relief! My teeth feel weaker though...but that's to be expected.
Murdoc: *stepping out* Why don't we just go grab a shower then?
Hell: *accepting a towel* Mm, yeah, suits me.
Murdoc: Right then.
Hell: Erm, aren't you uh-
Murdoc: Yes?
Hell: Forgetting, ummm...anything?
Murdoc: *walking down the hall wet and uncensored* Nnnnno, don't think so. You left your glasses though.
Hell: *hyper zooms there and back* I'm scared to put these on actually...
Murdoc: Afraid you can't handle the view?
Hell: A-hem. Sort of.
Murdoc: By "sort of", you mean exactly don't you?
Hell: YES, dammit.
Murdoc: Ahawhawwwwwww, knew it.
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Hell: *pausing and sighing* I'm doomed.
Murdoc: Just accept that you can't resist, it's the only way.
Hell: Look, I KNOW, alright? Do you have to rub my face in it?
Murdoc: Whoops. *pulls hand from back of your head*
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Hell: You're a real jerk, you know that? *dons specs* There. Ah, damn.
Murdoc: Expected results?
Hell: Why aren't you a stripper?
Murdoc: *takes my arm* Steady, girl.
Hell: Answer the question.
Murdoc: Awww, hawhaw. Well, you know, I thought about it, right?
Hell: And?
Murdoc: And as I was going through my options, I realized that I'd have to perform for men as well, you know, and it...what did I tell you about your face?
Hell: *features condensed to a single square inch* It can't be helped!
Murdoc: Just get in the shower.
Hell: I want you to do that Flashdance thing for me.
Murdoc: *turning taps* Mmph.
Hell: Only do it with wine
Murdoc: Er-
Hell: And fire.
Murdoc: You want to see me doused...in flaming wine.
Hell: Yes.
Murdoc: We'll see...but I have to stipulate-
Hell: Not to the same song.
Murdoc: Oh! All systems go then.
Hell: YAY!
Murdoc: Ack! No shower flailing!
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OUH GOD THIS IS AWESOMEEEE!!!!
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LOL, thanks, I really like it myself, sort of like a little bit of temptation every time I look at him. Mmmmmm.... I can resist anything except temptation, LOL.
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oouh mhrrrr YEES *w*
*moans with delight*
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Agree with you there 200%
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I hope that's a good 0_0
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Hahahahaha! *whispers* One of us... you are now one of us.... the Niccals Nightstalkers....
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Oh, I was already a fangirl~! ;D
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I suspected as much 
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Huzzah for the Murdoc fangirls!
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I'm with you 110% on that 
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DON'T DIE!!!! Or you'll miss all future Murdoc hotnesses!
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nooo.. i mustn't! Murdoc save me!
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He'll save you alright. From a life of tedium. Any man who has a set of handcuffs to play with has to have some interesting thought processes
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