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Description
James and the Giant Peach - Mr. Grasshopper and Mr. Centipede

dotanon asked:
"Man! I suddenly realized that I wasn't following this blog! What a terrible supporter I am! Anyway, good luck in your campaign! And if I might, will you be releasing an official personal profile to the press! I'd love to read more about your experiences as someone who's climb so far up the social ladder!"
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Centipede is a bug on the move! Born in Brooklyn in 19--, from a tender age this insect worked alongside his relatives in the family business, commuting from Manhattan Square Gardens and Brooklyn everyday, to provide ambiance for the more dilapidated locker rooms.
Mr. Grasshopper, in the margins, in red: You were not a daily commuter, obviously. Furthermore, ascertaining the details or indeed, the existence, of the records of employment for your family has been, to put it lightly, far beyond the bounds of physical possibility.

“I owe a lot to the bugs in the back,” Muhammad Ali once said of the Centipedes,
Mr. Grasshopper: He did not.
“especially the little one in the hat. He’s going to be something big one day.”
Mr. Grasshopper: No.

But though boxing would be a lifelong passion for the magnificent millipede, his heart lay in another direction--adventure. Brilliant from his youth and self-educated with the guiding light of National Geographic magazine
Mr. Grasshopper: Don’t get me started.
young Centipede went off to see his fortune. He bade his family farewell and climbed aboard the pant leg of a sharp young businessman taking a journey to the wilds of England. He deplaned at Heathrow and began shaking up the town.

“He’s a sharp negotiator,” Winston Churchill said of the young bug, who scraped by as shoeshine outside of the office of the Prime Minister. “He’ll be a force to contend with, mark my words.”
Mr. Grasshopper: Dear God. He did not.

As Centipede began to feel the beat of London life, he developed a certain ability in games of chance. An able Blackjack dealer and lucky by nature, Centipede successfully attained employment as a dealer and bartender in a local high-class bar. Moving in new circles, Centipede made friends and influenced people, getting his first intimate look at that which would become his driving passion: politics.

Diana Dors graced six of the incredible Centipede’s strong arms
Mr. Grasshopper: What incredible nonsense! We shall be sued for libel!
over the course of a torrid affair one sultry London summer. “He was one of the great loves of my life,” she was known to sigh later.
Mr. Grasshopper: It goes without saying that she most definitely did not.

But the glamour and pretense of London life wore on Centipede’s masculine yet finely-tuned sensibilities. “I am within and without. Simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life,” he wrote to his friend Fitzgerald.
Mr. Grasshopper: Omit entirely. This draft is useless. We shall have to start from scratch.

Disillusioned and ignoring the pleading lamentations of his friends, Centipede took himself to the North country. There, he pondered his travels and his experiences on the rocky moors and considered his next move. His heart, he knew, was with the people--but not just any people. He longed for the people of New York, the finest people in the world, the land of the free and the home of the brave, ready to get down and dirty to do what they had to do prove that they were the best city in the world.

All unaware of what was in store for him, the marvelous bug contemplated his lot over a few bites of enchanted peach. His life took an abrupt change for the extraordinary, as it had always done. Even as every step Centipede took was a step up, his next step was six feet up. Under mysterious circumstances, Centipede developed a more highly sophisticated brain and a figure even more inclined to suit the ladies than his previous form had been--if such a thing were possible.
Mr. Grasshopper, red line through “and a figure...possible”: You has such healthy self esteem and you can advertise it just as well through deed as through word.

Accompanied by a patchy crew and a brave young boy, Centipede single-handedly
Mr. Grasshopper: You bloody scoundrel.
sought danger and adventure, ever bringing his newfound family to safe waters after each interlude. Upon making his explosive reappearance in New York City, Centipede established himself as a man about town and a local expert on all matters pertaining to his city.

Yet the life of glitz and glamour could not hold his attention in light of what he had learned on the moors and his passion for public service had not disappeared. On the advice of a colleague
Mr. Grasshopper: I’m not sure whether to be insulted or relieved that you did not mention me by name.
Centipede entered the ring, this time as a fighter for justice, a warrior on the side of the people.

Centipede’s a local bug with local values, devoted to New York as she is--not as some want to make her! He’ll clean up the streets and work with the people to help them move their interests, not big business or big government interests. Centipede’s in no man’s pocket and he intends to stay that way!

Vote for Centipede, because there ain’t no party like a Centipede party.
Mr. Grasshopper: I have the persistent impression that this is a reference to something, but I could not say to what. In any event, rewrite this. It is the most sensationalist, self-aggrandizing, impossible, false document I have ever been compelled to read. We need to begin to deal in fact, not fantasy.
----
Ask a question: centipede-for-mayor.tumblr.com…

Description
James and the Giant Peach - Mr. Grasshopper and Mr. Centipede

dotanon asked:
"Man! I suddenly realized that I wasn't following this blog! What a terrible supporter I am! Anyway, good luck in your campaign! And if I might, will you be releasing an official personal profile to the press! I'd love to read more about your experiences as someone who's climb so far up the social ladder!"
----
Centipede is a bug on the move! Born in Brooklyn in 19--, from a tender age this insect worked alongside his relatives in the family business, commuting from Manhattan Square Gardens and Brooklyn everyday, to provide ambiance for the more dilapidated locker rooms.
Mr. Grasshopper, in the margins, in red: You were not a daily commuter, obviously. Furthermore, ascertaining the details or indeed, the existence, of the records of employment for your family has been, to put it lightly, far beyond the bounds of physical possibility.

“I owe a lot to the bugs in the back,” Muhammad Ali once said of the Centipedes,
Mr. Grasshopper: He did not.
“especially the little one in the hat. He’s going to be something big one day.”
Mr. Grasshopper: No.

But though boxing would be a lifelong passion for the magnificent millipede, his heart lay in another direction--adventure. Brilliant from his youth and self-educated with the guiding light of National Geographic magazine
Mr. Grasshopper: Don’t get me started.
young Centipede went off to see his fortune. He bade his family farewell and climbed aboard the pant leg of a sharp young businessman taking a journey to the wilds of England. He deplaned at Heathrow and began shaking up the town.

“He’s a sharp negotiator,” Winston Churchill said of the young bug, who scraped by as shoeshine outside of the office of the Prime Minister. “He’ll be a force to contend with, mark my words.”
Mr. Grasshopper: Dear God. He did not.

As Centipede began to feel the beat of London life, he developed a certain ability in games of chance. An able Blackjack dealer and lucky by nature, Centipede successfully attained employment as a dealer and bartender in a local high-class bar. Moving in new circles, Centipede made friends and influenced people, getting his first intimate look at that which would become his driving passion: politics.

Diana Dors graced six of the incredible Centipede’s strong arms
Mr. Grasshopper: What incredible nonsense! We shall be sued for libel!
over the course of a torrid affair one sultry London summer. “He was one of the great loves of my life,” she was known to sigh later.
Mr. Grasshopper: It goes without saying that she most definitely did not.

But the glamour and pretense of London life wore on Centipede’s masculine yet finely-tuned sensibilities. “I am within and without. Simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life,” he wrote to his friend Fitzgerald.
Mr. Grasshopper: Omit entirely. This draft is useless. We shall have to start from scratch.

Disillusioned and ignoring the pleading lamentations of his friends, Centipede took himself to the North country. There, he pondered his travels and his experiences on the rocky moors and considered his next move. His heart, he knew, was with the people--but not just any people. He longed for the people of New York, the finest people in the world, the land of the free and the home of the brave, ready to get down and dirty to do what they had to do prove that they were the best city in the world.

All unaware of what was in store for him, the marvelous bug contemplated his lot over a few bites of enchanted peach. His life took an abrupt change for the extraordinary, as it had always done. Even as every step Centipede took was a step up, his next step was six feet up. Under mysterious circumstances, Centipede developed a more highly sophisticated brain and a figure even more inclined to suit the ladies than his previous form had been--if such a thing were possible.
Mr. Grasshopper, red line through “and a figure...possible”: You has such healthy self esteem and you can advertise it just as well through deed as through word.

Accompanied by a patchy crew and a brave young boy, Centipede single-handedly
Mr. Grasshopper: You bloody scoundrel.
sought danger and adventure, ever bringing his newfound family to safe waters after each interlude. Upon making his explosive reappearance in New York City, Centipede established himself as a man about town and a local expert on all matters pertaining to his city.

Yet the life of glitz and glamour could not hold his attention in light of what he had learned on the moors and his passion for public service had not disappeared. On the advice of a colleague
Mr. Grasshopper: I’m not sure whether to be insulted or relieved that you did not mention me by name.
Centipede entered the ring, this time as a fighter for justice, a warrior on the side of the people.

Centipede’s a local bug with local values, devoted to New York as she is--not as some want to make her! He’ll clean up the streets and work with the people to help them move their interests, not big business or big government interests. Centipede’s in no man’s pocket and he intends to stay that way!

Vote for Centipede, because there ain’t no party like a Centipede party.
Mr. Grasshopper: I have the persistent impression that this is a reference to something, but I could not say to what. In any event, rewrite this. It is the most sensationalist, self-aggrandizing, impossible, false document I have ever been compelled to read. We need to begin to deal in fact, not fantasy.
----
Ask a question: centipede-for-mayor.tumblr.com…