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Endless-Rainfall — MC - First scene

Published: 2010-03-06 03:28:54 +0000 UTC; Views: 8231; Favourites: 183; Downloads: 89
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“Minako, wake up!”

“Minako!”

“Come on, Minako, wake up already!”

“Please! You’ll be mad at me if you don’t!”

Even though they’d been through this ordeal too many times to count by now, Kichiro still always failed to wake his lazy sister up. The blonde boy sighed, shaking her some more. Deep breath, and…

“MINAKO!”

The girl’s eyes shot open.

…Then closed again.

Kichiro whined. The two had planned this whole thing earlier, so why did she have to fall asleep in the first place? He managed to stay awake!

The plan was simple. They were going to wait until midnight, until their Father was fast asleep, and sneak out. Well, Minako was, anyway. Kichiro decided to stay behind, to keep his Father from finding out for as long as possible.
…While actually, he was just too scared to run away in the middle of the night. I mean, there are ghost Pokemon and stuff out then, right?

So yes. It was a simple plan. A pretty risky one, considering how protective their Father was. But still, they could handle it.
So why were they doing this in the first place? Well…

“MINAKO!”

Finally, she opened her eyes again. Mumbling some irritated words, she tried to focus. Kichiro leaned right in, teeth chattering as he trembled nervously.

“It’s past midnight, Minako-!”

“…Huh…What do you want…?”

Bam. Focusing fully, right there was the distressed face of her brother.

“Aaagh!” Her eyes widened as she swatted him away. Onto the floor he fell.

“Oww..”

“…Oh- Uh, sorry, haha.” She laughed as she rubbed her eyes and sat up.

“Y-You’re the one that wanted to go out at midnight! You shouldn’t have fallen asleep!” The boy cried, getting to his feet. “Maybe this isn’t such a good idea…”

Hearing this, Minako frowned. Stupid scaredy-brother. Of course he’d want to back out now.

“Kichiro, we’re doing this! There’s no way I’m giving it up now, look how far we’ve come!”

”Yeah, ten minutes late…”

“What?! Ugh, quick, pack the last of the stuff!”

Minako ran over to the window and slid it open. On the other side was a fold out ladder attached. Unlocking it, a long row of bars fell to the ground.

“H-here…” Kichiro handed over a white shoulder bag. “Okay...?”

“Okay. Thanks.” She replied, taking it and climbing out of the window and onto the ladder.

“U-Uhm, are you sure you’ll be alright?” Her brother asked.

“It’ll be fine, Kichiro. C’mon,” She poked her tongue out, “You’re the one that we should worry about. Don’t go spilling it all to Dad,”

“I-I won’t!”

“Better not.” She gave a threatening look. “’Cause I can’t get caught. This is important.”

“I know…” He replied, looking down. “…O-Oh, don’t forget this.”

He handed a letter over to her. It looked rather old and handled, but was still in good condition. She stared at it for a few moments, thoughtfully. Then she smiled.

“We’ll sort this out. I’m sure I’ll find her.”

Kichiro smiled back.

“I really hope so.”

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And yesh. So that's the first bit of Makoto Challenge.
(I kinda fail at writing, sorry. But you get the picture.)

I want to start writing it out again, but I dunno how long that will last. I'll try to, anyway. Or at least draw some scene pictures like these.
Related content
Comments: 133

WhoaWhoaSlowDown [2012-01-06 12:31:39 +0000 UTC]

I love how you draw and how you make screenshots!
BTW the short story is awesome. Ruby is so naughty

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Ninplanet123 [2011-11-02 23:03:21 +0000 UTC]

Minako REALLY is a troublemaker!!

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pikaforce [2011-08-13 04:21:15 +0000 UTC]

but ruby don't sleep

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Spirit-of-the-Rain [2010-12-12 18:07:12 +0000 UTC]

You should write a fanfiction with your skill!

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KimaraMew [2010-11-18 02:57:06 +0000 UTC]

Wow this looks like a real screenshot! Awesome!

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PaladinArtea [2010-04-10 14:09:51 +0000 UTC]

Nice start to this story!

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ashandmayslove [2010-03-16 12:22:36 +0000 UTC]

This is awesome! I'd love to see more of these, if you made an anime I'd totally watch

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TheLegendOfLink [2010-03-15 18:55:21 +0000 UTC]

It would of been awesome if u did à anime :'D i would watch it Everyday

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to TheLegendOfLink [2010-03-16 10:42:32 +0000 UTC]

I'd love to make my own animated scenes, way too much work though XD

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

TheLegendOfLink In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-16 12:45:23 +0000 UTC]

yeah I know and I hope that in the future that you'll make one if u are theen good luck XD

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to TheLegendOfLink [2010-03-16 14:39:49 +0000 UTC]

Haha thanks xD

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TheLegendOfLink In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-16 18:18:16 +0000 UTC]

Your welcome X3

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DaiRidley [2010-03-13 23:28:05 +0000 UTC]

I love it, and I would love to see more. Great job.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to DaiRidley [2010-03-14 09:28:52 +0000 UTC]

Thanks ^^

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SteveAnime [2010-03-13 07:01:02 +0000 UTC]

great job

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to SteveAnime [2010-03-14 09:29:11 +0000 UTC]

Thanks

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

SteveAnime In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-14 09:46:02 +0000 UTC]

you welcome

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TiraTira1023x [2010-03-12 18:18:26 +0000 UTC]

Awesome pic and story~
You're rewriting your Makoto Challenge story? And you don't suck at writing!
In the pic, I like how it's dark to fit in with the night time scene~
The room looks cool~ Plus the clouds and the stars in the window~ And Minako and Kichiro's expressions~ Not to mention Kichiro's pajamas
Great work~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to TiraTira1023x [2010-03-14 10:06:30 +0000 UTC]

Thankyou! x3
Yep xD I really need to practise my writing..thanks though xD

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MercurialMind [2010-03-12 17:03:20 +0000 UTC]

The background is fantastic, looks like a scene from the anime I don't know why, but for a moment I thought it was raining... I like Kichiro's hairstyle and pajamas [sp?] And your writing is good! [it's just that most writers are never satisfied with how they write- it's a fact] I thought the scene was interesting, and now I wonder what was in that letter

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to MercurialMind [2010-03-14 10:05:36 +0000 UTC]

>w< Thanks a lot! x3

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Zinoman [2010-03-10 19:06:14 +0000 UTC]

I wanna pair these two.... XD
Kichiro is just too adorable to resist<3

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to Zinoman [2010-03-14 10:05:15 +0000 UTC]

Ahaha
...Go ahead? -shot-

Thanksss x3

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Electric-Raichu [2010-03-06 22:07:33 +0000 UTC]

Hey that's pretty good. You're starting in the middle of the action, and you fill the reader in through natural conversation and occasional short flashback. There's a hook to get the reader interested and your characters are realistic, different, and easy to identify with.

Perhaps you could have identified who was older.

Keep writing!


I like the design on Kichiro's pyjamas!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to Electric-Raichu [2010-03-14 10:04:51 +0000 UTC]

Thankyou! ^^
They're both 10, I'm not exactly sure who will be older, I think Kichiro will be though. :3

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ThunderWolfang [2010-03-06 19:38:02 +0000 UTC]

You did awesome! 8D

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to ThunderWolfang [2010-03-14 10:03:41 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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ThunderWolfang In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-14 17:33:20 +0000 UTC]

Welcome

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iandin123 [2010-03-06 18:42:14 +0000 UTC]

Lol! Kichiro and Minako as bros and sis means best of adventures!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to iandin123 [2010-03-14 10:03:35 +0000 UTC]

Haha~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

iandin123 In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-14 21:16:09 +0000 UTC]

Yesh! Though I wonder who 'SHE' is in this story though...

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to iandin123 [2010-03-16 11:17:38 +0000 UTC]

Everyone will find out eventually xD If I can keep writing that is..

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iandin123 In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-16 23:02:04 +0000 UTC]

Yay! Keep writing!

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PuccaFanGirl [2010-03-06 18:31:05 +0000 UTC]

Wow! It looks just like a REAL ANIME screenshot with english subs! AWESOME WORK!

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to PuccaFanGirl [2010-03-14 10:03:26 +0000 UTC]

Thankyou!! x3

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Parastorm [2010-03-06 17:57:29 +0000 UTC]

Your writing is definitely nothing to do with failing D:.

It was intriguing Love it, especially the drawing

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to Parastorm [2010-03-14 10:02:55 +0000 UTC]

>w< Aw thankyou~

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Parastorm In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-14 11:41:21 +0000 UTC]

^^ You're very welcome

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MelonPiranha [2010-03-06 16:56:52 +0000 UTC]

Nyuk nyuk... Melon likes the fashion of goodness that was written in your story of words. Thumbs up, comrade!
(did you understand any of that? XD)

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to MelonPiranha [2010-03-14 10:02:43 +0000 UTC]

Sort of.
Thank you xD

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MelonPiranha In reply to Endless-Rainfall [2010-03-14 19:01:37 +0000 UTC]

Anytime!

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Emerald-Stars [2010-03-06 16:11:18 +0000 UTC]

you dont fail at writing!!!

you are awsome at it!! (trust me, i can barely think of a decent idea for a story)

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to Emerald-Stars [2010-03-14 09:50:13 +0000 UTC]

XD Aw thank you <3
It's hard to think of even one idea..Dx

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MaRii1113 [2010-03-06 14:56:58 +0000 UTC]

pretty cool .. i really liked this first part of the story

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to MaRii1113 [2010-03-14 09:49:38 +0000 UTC]

Thanks

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SaphRed [2010-03-06 14:39:09 +0000 UTC]

great work, this is really good scene ^^

sorry for bad english

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Endless-Rainfall In reply to SaphRed [2010-03-14 09:49:31 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! x3

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hikariangelove [2010-03-06 14:05:11 +0000 UTC]

is like the anime very good *w*

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Endless-Rainfall In reply to hikariangelove [2010-03-14 09:49:25 +0000 UTC]

Thankyou! X3

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AdvanceIkari4Ever [2010-03-06 13:57:28 +0000 UTC]

Really neat scene. I think Minako feels a little awkward.

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