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Genesis-Orbit β My Thoughts Today
Published: 2006-02-14 03:14:25 +0000 UTC; Views: 8902; Favourites: 202; Downloads: 2291
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My Thoughts TodayThere are a lot of things on my minds these days, yet I'm not confused at all. These thoughts are good thoughts and good feelings. Let me explain. The abstract thing in this peice represents me. At the bottom right of the peice you can see light, but I am not there. This explains my backgrounds. I've been raised in a Christian atmosphere, which to me is good. That light continues on to the top left of the peice. About 3/4 of the way there, I comes out of the ground. I've realized as of late that just becuase I've been in this Christian atmosphere doesn't mean I was always this joyus Christian who's been happy about everything. I had a lot of realizations last night when I was talking to my friend. We went to a Christian highschool. I just went in there becuase it was part of the school system and I didn't have a problem with that. By the end of my Sr. year, I didn't feel any stronger in my faith, but that was nothing new to me becuase I just felt this was the way most people felt. My friend on the other hand took things a lot more serious than me and is now agnostic (I think). Now we're in college. I've never been happier and it's the same with him. After just 1 semester, I made a good realization. Motivation. Through my whole life, church really wasn't an option for me. I've never been one to argue becuase I respect my parents too much to insult their beliefs. Back in highschool, chapel wasn't an option. Here it is. I hated chapel in highschool, and now I love it. You might ask, why? I know in my heart that Christianity is right for me. I've always known that I should praise God, but I didn't. Back to the non optional chapel in highschool, most of the students didn't want to be there, and my friends definately didn't want to be there either, so what was I supposed to do? I did what everyone else did, I didn't sing beucase I feard judgement. Now here in college, priase and worship is an option. If people don't want to go, thats perfectly fine. My friends here always go to it. I went about half the time last semester and I still had a little bit of that uncertainty whether or not to sing brought over from highschool. I'm not sure when it happened, but I just stopped caring about judgement and all that crap becuase I know no one is going to judge me here. People wouldn't be attending a Christian college if they didn't want to get a good education and grow spiritually with God. The night at praise and worship I stopped caring about judgement and just totally sang out every word, I really can't give you the words of what I felt. It was then I knew and understood what I had to do to be the happiest I've ever been. I feel like I've finally figured everything out in what I have to do in my life to keep happy. I feel that all of my doubts through highschool when I really started to think about my religion have finally left. Last, you see me, this abstract shape moving towards the light unblocked or stuck. This is where I am today.
I know the community at this site might not share my same feelings, and I won't stick that I'm holier than though crap on all of you either. If you have any questions about this I'll be more than happy to answer. Thanks for anyone who helped me gain the skills and inspiration to be the artist I am today, to allow my images express my thoughts and words. I would deeply appreciate it if you didn't critique this peice because this means more than you can ever imagine to me. (Honestly I'm almost in tears here lol).
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Comments: 103
Hey thanks man, its fun to come back to this piece, I feel like I've grown a lot since then, but it's cool to come back to a piece to remember what it represented to me at the time. Can't believe it's been more than 4 years since I did this lol.
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I can't possibly say how much I love this. ;_;
I know that feeling. I get it whenever I go outside to stand and absorb the sunlight, and feel the wind, and to just bask in the beauty of this amazing world. The fact that I exist, that I'm here to experience that, makes me happier then I can possibly explain. I don't need to know why. I'm just happy to be alive.
I'm 
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Haha oddly enough what I replied to in my journal would be suiting for this too xD. I absolutely agree with you; it's something that I've been reflecting upon lately, like, life itself is the greatest gift we can possibly have, and to actually find that median where you don't care what happens because you finally feel like you got things straight, got that philosophy that you don't care where life takes you because you realize that this life shouldn't be lived for yourself, but for others...that is probably one of the greatest feelings I can possibly get.
For me, just going outside and looking around puts me in a spiritual high because despite the fact that there is a lot of crap going on in the world, it's so incredibly beautiful and I just don't like to believe that in the midst of the earth's beauty, there isn't anything else out there that we don't know or can explain. I don't particularly like to say it but I just almost find it pessimistic to think that everything we see when we go outside; there's nothing spiritual about it.
I seriously don't understand how some people can get so down on life. The gift of life is the greatest gift we can receive.
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First of all, I'd just like to say that it is a beautifull work you have made and that the comment I'm going to give isn't meant to be destructive.
I am really glad you got over your fears...
...but...
But it seems like you say you only can sing and give your all for God in worship because your friends that would judge you are there.
It seems like you say that if it would again become obligated, and those other friends would be there again you'd have the same problem all over again. Am I right here?
If so then I'd like you to look and get inspired by DaniΓ«l and his friends in BabyloniΓ«. The didn't bow before the mass and the expections, obligations even, when they went against God. (DaniΓ«ls friends didn't bow for the statue of the king)
And they didn't stop praying, even when it was forbidden. DaniΓ«l face the lion's den for this.
His friends faced the furnace for their faith. And you know what? When they wen't to the furnace, it didn't matter wheter or not they would be saved from it. They would have gladly died.
This just as a reminder. I may have misinterpreted your explenation, and I know I still have difficulties with going all-out for God. So I don't come here in an I am better then you attitude. But only with an issue that plays in my life as well. Am I giving God everything, even if it makes me foolish before my friends? Like when David danced before the arc . Am I like that? Is God that important for me?
Often I see that he doesn't seem that important to me. And I am ashamed of that.
Anyway, I'm diverting and going introspective.
But I guess you get my point.
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Well, first and foremost, I don't think I'd go back to my old ways of feeling judgement from my friends if they were to come and join me in praise and worship becuase this whole experience....lets just say I grew spiritiually, I didn't change for the moment you know? I just needed the propper motivation to get past the judgement part, and I know now I could never return to my state in highschool becuase I feel so much better now, and I can only hope that my friends in highschool can share that experience with me some day.
I'm not going to say it would be just as easy if I didn't have the support I do from my friends in college, they have helped me more than anyone else, and I need to grow further to have confidence in myself. But don't worry, as time goes by this becomes less of a touchy subject of mine
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okay, thats good then.
Lets all keep on growing!
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This is honestly some the most moving pieces I've seen here on DA. Perhaps in the real world, too. I felt for a long time that praise and worship was the adults and I feared being ridculed for joining in. Last night, in service, I felt so glad that I had changed my mind long ago to forget everyone around me and just praise my God. It's a feeling I can't really describe other than joyous.
Thanks for sharing this with us!
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WOW.....thats amazing....I love it..........
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Wonderful art, wonderful meaning and words behind it... I'm glad for you...
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Wow, what a great testimony! I love the art you made to represent it
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wow, this is amazing 
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i love it. it's really good and the thought and your experiences behind it make it even more beautifull.
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The abstract peace on the top reminded me of the head of a chinese dragon for some reason. Chinese dragons are wise, and I know you made
a wonderful/wise decision to come back to a full heart in Christ! I struggle with the same thing sometimes in chapel. I sometimes worry that
the people around me are mentally judging me, but all I have to do is remember that is Satan whispering me lies because he wants me from
completely prasing God! So lift your hands up high, sing, dance, it's not for us...it' s for Him! 
Keep moving into the light!
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Thanks for the comment
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I really like how you didn't put a cross
anywere you just put how you feel.
In other words you let others have
aplicablity to your art.
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Yea, I didn't feel that the corss was necessary, just didn't mix with the style I was going for lol. Thanks
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unless you where doing an aboringie stlye.
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I absolutely love this. The style, colors, composition, and I love a good abstract piece.
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Great art! Looks Awsome. Tons of emotion put into! Truly great! +Faved
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Wow, simply amazing, great description. I can really feel this after reading the description.
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this is so beautiful. i love how it is all blurred and unclear, with somewhat a layer of order while the rest seem chaotic. it reminds me of ink or paint when dipped in water. i will try to reach the same effects in my upcoming deviations
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I just want to respond to what you said, and yes, I think I see it in the picture, too. Since Jesus took our punishment, judgment falls on Him, not on us. When God looks at us, He sees Jesus, Who gave us His perfect covering of righteousness. All our debts have been paid. That is something to celebrate! All of that said, joy is a feeling, an emotion. Emotions are still fickle because our emotions are not yet fully sanctified. So we can FEEL anything, but it has nothing to do with our relationship with God. I have a close friend who told me that she once doubted her own faith because she didn't feel the joy that her friends were showing. When I found out about it, I told her the same thing I am telling you. It made a huge difference in her life. We go through trials here, and we don't always FEEL like being joyful. Those people who act joyful all the time, it could be just an act. But the knowledge that we are secure in Christ is what counts. When I was growing up, my father was judgmental of me all the time. I kept feeling the same as you. I knew my sins had been paid for, but I hadn't taken that into my heart, because I was judging God by my father (a natural thing to do). It wasn't until I was in my 40's that I realized what I was doing, and just realizing that made a huge difference. I was able to release those feelings that my father had taught me, and I was able to grasp that God really HAS forgiven me completely, and that I have nothing to fear. Now that I am able to grasp this in my heart, I can truly rejoice. I hope this helps. There ARE other people on dA who think like you do. Feel free to respond to this, and let's have a conversation.
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Thanks it did help. It just seems that the difference from highschool to college is so great. Lets continue this conversation later, ironically I have to go to church now hehe.
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Yes, college is a big watershed if you will. It's where people really start to question and think things through. I did it, too. And it's fine for you to go to church now. 
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its flawless.. absolutely amazing.. great job, you've outdone urself yet again
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Not only has this been saved it's been Bookmarked in my house and on my school file
You've got to teach me the way you make your brushes because I make terrible ones and these are just out of this world
I think you could go professional
P.S-Enjoy Retirement on IFSZ this is Jago by the way
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wow i love the colors and the form
great motion
very cool thin the tope left.. i like how it has nice texturea nd such but isnt.. perfectly smooth
very nicely done
good work
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Very impressive
I want to learn how to create such beautiful art
(I faved it too)
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