HOME | DD

Description
My photos are a couple weeks behind. I try to do a few every day when I have time so that I’ll catch up. Dedicating myself to writing longer descriptions obviously hinders this process. I have to take a moment to sit back and think about what I want to say. If the photo represents my day, I can certainly just talk about that. That’s easy enough. Otherwise I have to think about what I’m trying to say with the photo, what my face or my soul is saying.

I’m pretty modest about my photography. I’m confident about what I can do and what I’ve learned, but I also know I still have a long way to go. I know I’m not perfect and amazing. I know that I have limits and I know that my equipment does, too. I don’t think that every photo I take has a deep meaning, or one that doesn’t need an explanation.

But I’m not trying to take brilliant photographs with this project. I’m simply trying to reflect on myself and capture a year of time. I don’t even expect too many people to care. It’s for me.

The first time I did this project I obviously didn’t have the extra few years of experience that I do now. It got really difficult for me, mentally. I needed to post all photos for the integrity of the project, and I needed to know people were watching to keep me from quitting. Yet forcing myself to post all the blow-offs and failed ideas, because I had to, even when they were terrible, was destroying me. It was making me feel like I had no future as a photographer. It really brought me down.

What’s funny about the whole thing is that, even though I had no illusions about my bad photos, looking back now on the whole set makes me cringe sometimes. I mean, it’s cute. I get it. I was learning. But I’m so glad to do it again now to redeem myself. The photos were vastly better even from the first week. I also had a really dark monitor, even though it passed all those grayscale tests and stuff. So everything is processed sooo dark. I look back and I’m like, jesus christ. This is ridiculous.

I still have so much to learn and I know I’m not perfect, but a photo like this, for example, would never have happened the first time. I took it in my bedroom under the ceiling light, like five seconds before running off to work. I was in my bra, I wasn’t even dressed yet. But I feel I was able to salvage it because I’ve had the extra few years to practice and develop my ~vision~.

Sometimes when I see really amazing, perfect, beautiful photos, I panic instead of enjoying them. I feel instant defeat because I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to do it. I have to remember to be patient, to feel inspired instead of afraid, and give it time. I’ve already changed so much, I have to keep going.

113/365.

Description
My photos are a couple weeks behind. I try to do a few every day when I have time so that I’ll catch up. Dedicating myself to writing longer descriptions obviously hinders this process. I have to take a moment to sit back and think about what I want to say. If the photo represents my day, I can certainly just talk about that. That’s easy enough. Otherwise I have to think about what I’m trying to say with the photo, what my face or my soul is saying.

I’m pretty modest about my photography. I’m confident about what I can do and what I’ve learned, but I also know I still have a long way to go. I know I’m not perfect and amazing. I know that I have limits and I know that my equipment does, too. I don’t think that every photo I take has a deep meaning, or one that doesn’t need an explanation.

But I’m not trying to take brilliant photographs with this project. I’m simply trying to reflect on myself and capture a year of time. I don’t even expect too many people to care. It’s for me.

The first time I did this project I obviously didn’t have the extra few years of experience that I do now. It got really difficult for me, mentally. I needed to post all photos for the integrity of the project, and I needed to know people were watching to keep me from quitting. Yet forcing myself to post all the blow-offs and failed ideas, because I had to, even when they were terrible, was destroying me. It was making me feel like I had no future as a photographer. It really brought me down.

What’s funny about the whole thing is that, even though I had no illusions about my bad photos, looking back now on the whole set makes me cringe sometimes. I mean, it’s cute. I get it. I was learning. But I’m so glad to do it again now to redeem myself. The photos were vastly better even from the first week. I also had a really dark monitor, even though it passed all those grayscale tests and stuff. So everything is processed sooo dark. I look back and I’m like, jesus christ. This is ridiculous.

I still have so much to learn and I know I’m not perfect, but a photo like this, for example, would never have happened the first time. I took it in my bedroom under the ceiling light, like five seconds before running off to work. I was in my bra, I wasn’t even dressed yet. But I feel I was able to salvage it because I’ve had the extra few years to practice and develop my ~vision~.

Sometimes when I see really amazing, perfect, beautiful photos, I panic instead of enjoying them. I feel instant defeat because I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to do it. I have to remember to be patient, to feel inspired instead of afraid, and give it time. I’ve already changed so much, I have to keep going.

113/365.