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I'm not sure if this is a common thing for a lot of creators out there, but I've lately been feeling like I have too many ideas and absolutely no ideas at the same time for the past few weeks (anyone out there who's ever felt like that too, feel free to let me know). Anyway, just to show you what I mean, here's a list of all the stuff I've been thinking about giving a full review treatment too but haven't yet for one reason or another (expect quite a few Animation Infamy's in here).

6- Caillou (Animation Infamy)- I said that I wouldn't tackle preschool shows simply on the basis that its not something that I concern myself with unless the show isn't teaching kids anything of value or substance like Dora the Explorer, teaches them awful/dangerous lessons like TTG (which might not be classified as a preschool show, but that's only because the preschoolers are more mature than the TTG crew; not the characters, the people MAKING the show), or do something truly exceptional and admirable like Sofia the First. Caillou is certainly admirable, but not for anything good. If you think this is just me joining up with all the angry trolls and soccer moms to pick on a Canadian show for babies, let me tell you something right now: Caillou (pronounced Ky-Yoo, just to be clear) is a TERRIBLE show, even by the lowest of low standards for preschool shows. I hated this cartoon even when I was a kid. To put things in perspective, Teletubbies would be less damaging to your toddler/preschooler. Caillou is a show about a bald 4-year-old who acts like a raging brat, almost never gets punished for it, and always gets his way; repeat for virtually every episode and SOMEHOW last for so long that it makes Archie look like a late 90's One Season Wonder. I don't know if I could even fill a whole card just saying "This show sucks, and Caillou is a brat that never gets punished." All this is going to do is teach your kid to throw tantrums to get their way, and I have yet to see ANYONE trying to defend this (or even find a way to justify its absurd length).

5- Chozen (Animation Unknown)- From the creators of Archer comes...Archer 2.5...? Okay, I'll be brief here; the premise is that a gay white rapper Phillip Cullens (aka Chozen, with a Z) was just released from prison after 10 years when he was framed by his former partner, who has taken over as the top rapper in the world under the name Phantasm. Not only that, but he ran his other former friends Crisco and Ricky out of the business altogether. So, with the help of his friends and his sister Tracy, he sets out to reclaim his title and dethrone Phantasm once and for all. Honestly...aside from the animation, this is a totally different show from Archer. Though the humor may be similar, the characters aren't as good, the storyline isn't particularly engaging, but I'd just say it's not for me and try it if you want to. I'm not saying I don't recommend it, but you might find it either a little too crass or kinda boring.

4- Shorty McShorts' Shorts (AU/AI)- If Mr. Enter hadn't covered this already, then I can guarantee that you'd be seeing a few of these pilots end up on here; I planned to review SMS (as in, the whole thing) for quite some time now, but I feel like the biggest thing holding me back is: A) none of the shorts are particularly interesting and I'd just assume they were all made by four people going by 30 different names, and B) there's not a lot to comment on for the show itself since the entire run is about an hour or so to get through. Here's a sign that you know this is the WORST pilot showcase series of all time: ZERO of the 13 shorts (actually, there's only 11 but I'm counting "Boyz on Da Run" as one show) EVER got picked up for a full series; unless you count SheZow! that I did an Animation Unknown on last year, but they changed literally everything to the point they're barely the same thing so I don't count that. Seriously, Random Cartoons got Fanboy & Chum-Chum picked up (okay, it sucked and it was probably the LAST thing from that series I would've taken but we got Adventure Time and 2 out of 40 vs. 0 out of 13 is still better). Almost every Shorty Short either did nothing with the premise they had (like Too Many Robots, which I tried to fix myself but I'm not cut out for cartoons, Sanchez Chronicles being the most blatant example of how my style works), tried to convince you they had something from nothing (like Mascot Prep or Troy Ride), or just had far too much faith in what they DID have (like The Phabulizers or the aforementioned Boyz on Da Run), or whatever the living hell Bozzelbag's Zip was supposed to be...other than weird and obnoxious. Considering Disney picked up Fish Hooks and Pickle & Peanut, this kinda surprises me.

3- Villainous- Guys, I know that I want Infinity Train, Twelve Forever, and Lakewood Plaza Turbo just as much as everyone else; we're all sick and fucking tired of Ben 10 2016, PPG '16/TTG's respective rotting carcasses, and bland schedule filler shitloads like My Knight & Me and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs- The Series (which I could review if not how that long ass title and dA's character limits on titles). I'm here to tell you: there is hope, but it's not with these so-called "heroes." Ladies, Gentlemen, and super-intelligent sharks that somehow know how to use a computer (for some reason), let me introduce you to "Villainous". This series follows a group of villains known as the Black Hat Organization, led by their leader Black Hat, along with his insane assistant Dementia (who already has her own cult following), a giant teddy bear named 5.0.5 (yes, really) who has absolutely nothing evil about him, and their lead scientist the neurotic Dr. Flug. Cartoon Network themselves actually seems to be very excited about the series, but so far it only exists as shorts for now, but that's how Mighty MagiSwords got its start and I like that show. The pace of this one is a bit less manic, but it's certainly worth a look. During my viewing of this series, I got a lot of Billy & Mandy flashbacks, but in a good way. It also kinda reminds me of The League of Super Evil, if the villains were actually competent. Guys, we've gotta help make this a thing and show the creators just how badly we WANT Infinity Train and Villainous. Right now, there's only a couple shorts in English but even if you don't understand Spanish you can still admire how amazing the animation looks and how much detail and effort went into this project.

2- The Slim Shady Show (AI)- I was originally planning on considering this one an Animation Unknown, only because the only AU review to ever receive a black bar was King Star King (and that was 20 reviews ago), but I think this might be the far easier option. I don't know if a lot of you guys know this, and I might get a lot of turbulence for this, but I'm actually a pretty big fan of Marshall "Eminem" Mathers and I enjoy quite a few of his songs. Hell, I didn't even hate Encore all the way through. Yeah, there's a lot of songs that I hear now and think "What the hell is this shit?" and I can see why even Em himself hated it enough to just disappear for almost a decade. This, however, probably had a lot more to do with that. Hell, at least Encore had songs like Mockingbird, Like Toy Soldiers, Puke (which my fans might recognize as the original ending theme for my Creepy Freaks video), and I still consider Just Lose it to be so bad, it's good; this show, however, ranks up there with Fack and pretty much the rest of the Encore album as some of the most unacceptable things Eminem has ever put out. The man who genuinely came off even more angry, violent, and dangerous as he said he was in his music, is here just making a tasteless, witless, cheap South Park clone. No literally, they straight up rip the boys FROM South Park in a shameless attempt at "satire". Granted, this was made in 2001 when Eminem was building popularity and South Park hadn't yet become a cultural juggernaut, but this is basically a watered-down inbred parody of a parody of a parody to the point that the animation looks more like something you'd find playing on a TV in the background of The Nutshack.

1- (Michael Conroy's) Alice in Wonderland (AI)- My long time fans that have been following my career from the beginning (or even before I was doing this whole review thing) will probably recognize this abomination as my third review ever, after Nutri-Ventures (which I revisited in one of my first Animation Unknown reviews) and Christmas is Here Again (which I revisited twice, both times for my Christmas Advent Calendar). However, this one managed to persistently come back to the forefront of my mind. I've looked at some really shitty, really cheap animation: crappy reboot after crappy reboot, shitty Flash animation, the witless, the offensive, the disturbing, the obnoxious, the arrogant, the regretful, and everything in between. Nothing could compare to this though. They literally just stole a public domain radio play AND SCRIBBLED SHITTY KINDERGARTEN DRAWINGS OVER EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that any of you out there, regardless of skill level, could do a better job than this. There's nothing that could possibly be any lower than this, even in Animation Infamy: Gilgamesh was reprehensible, Where the Dead go to Die was disturbing and horrible, Return of Slade pissed me off and offended me, Legends of Chamberlain Heights practically looks like Spirited Away in comparison. At least everything in that load of horse vomit was 100% originally made for that series. Hell, Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon "Comedy" might be awful and not even remotely in the same definition as comedy or wit of any kind, but at least you could say that all of it was original footage animated and created by people with money. This was not created, this is plagiarism. This is the same thing as stealing a painting from a museum, wiping your ass with it after a violent case of diarrhea, and then having the balls to CHARGE people to look at it. Watch this online, these fucking swindlers don't deserve a PENNY of your hard-earned money and deserve less than an attosecond of your precious time.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to prepare for July. Hope everyone out there is having a great summer and I hope to post more reviews in the future. In the meantime, though, I have something special for next week. It's not a review thing, but it's something that I'm actually pretty proud of myself for.

Description
I'm not sure if this is a common thing for a lot of creators out there, but I've lately been feeling like I have too many ideas and absolutely no ideas at the same time for the past few weeks (anyone out there who's ever felt like that too, feel free to let me know). Anyway, just to show you what I mean, here's a list of all the stuff I've been thinking about giving a full review treatment too but haven't yet for one reason or another (expect quite a few Animation Infamy's in here).

6- Caillou (Animation Infamy)- I said that I wouldn't tackle preschool shows simply on the basis that its not something that I concern myself with unless the show isn't teaching kids anything of value or substance like Dora the Explorer, teaches them awful/dangerous lessons like TTG (which might not be classified as a preschool show, but that's only because the preschoolers are more mature than the TTG crew; not the characters, the people MAKING the show), or do something truly exceptional and admirable like Sofia the First. Caillou is certainly admirable, but not for anything good. If you think this is just me joining up with all the angry trolls and soccer moms to pick on a Canadian show for babies, let me tell you something right now: Caillou (pronounced Ky-Yoo, just to be clear) is a TERRIBLE show, even by the lowest of low standards for preschool shows. I hated this cartoon even when I was a kid. To put things in perspective, Teletubbies would be less damaging to your toddler/preschooler. Caillou is a show about a bald 4-year-old who acts like a raging brat, almost never gets punished for it, and always gets his way; repeat for virtually every episode and SOMEHOW last for so long that it makes Archie look like a late 90's One Season Wonder. I don't know if I could even fill a whole card just saying "This show sucks, and Caillou is a brat that never gets punished." All this is going to do is teach your kid to throw tantrums to get their way, and I have yet to see ANYONE trying to defend this (or even find a way to justify its absurd length).

5- Chozen (Animation Unknown)- From the creators of Archer comes...Archer 2.5...? Okay, I'll be brief here; the premise is that a gay white rapper Phillip Cullens (aka Chozen, with a Z) was just released from prison after 10 years when he was framed by his former partner, who has taken over as the top rapper in the world under the name Phantasm. Not only that, but he ran his other former friends Crisco and Ricky out of the business altogether. So, with the help of his friends and his sister Tracy, he sets out to reclaim his title and dethrone Phantasm once and for all. Honestly...aside from the animation, this is a totally different show from Archer. Though the humor may be similar, the characters aren't as good, the storyline isn't particularly engaging, but I'd just say it's not for me and try it if you want to. I'm not saying I don't recommend it, but you might find it either a little too crass or kinda boring.

4- Shorty McShorts' Shorts (AU/AI)- If Mr. Enter hadn't covered this already, then I can guarantee that you'd be seeing a few of these pilots end up on here; I planned to review SMS (as in, the whole thing) for quite some time now, but I feel like the biggest thing holding me back is: A) none of the shorts are particularly interesting and I'd just assume they were all made by four people going by 30 different names, and B) there's not a lot to comment on for the show itself since the entire run is about an hour or so to get through. Here's a sign that you know this is the WORST pilot showcase series of all time: ZERO of the 13 shorts (actually, there's only 11 but I'm counting "Boyz on Da Run" as one show) EVER got picked up for a full series; unless you count SheZow! that I did an Animation Unknown on last year, but they changed literally everything to the point they're barely the same thing so I don't count that. Seriously, Random Cartoons got Fanboy & Chum-Chum picked up (okay, it sucked and it was probably the LAST thing from that series I would've taken but we got Adventure Time and 2 out of 40 vs. 0 out of 13 is still better). Almost every Shorty Short either did nothing with the premise they had (like Too Many Robots, which I tried to fix myself but I'm not cut out for cartoons, Sanchez Chronicles being the most blatant example of how my style works), tried to convince you they had something from nothing (like Mascot Prep or Troy Ride), or just had far too much faith in what they DID have (like The Phabulizers or the aforementioned Boyz on Da Run), or whatever the living hell Bozzelbag's Zip was supposed to be...other than weird and obnoxious. Considering Disney picked up Fish Hooks and Pickle & Peanut, this kinda surprises me.

3- Villainous- Guys, I know that I want Infinity Train, Twelve Forever, and Lakewood Plaza Turbo just as much as everyone else; we're all sick and fucking tired of Ben 10 2016, PPG '16/TTG's respective rotting carcasses, and bland schedule filler shitloads like My Knight & Me and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs- The Series (which I could review if not how that long ass title and dA's character limits on titles). I'm here to tell you: there is hope, but it's not with these so-called "heroes." Ladies, Gentlemen, and super-intelligent sharks that somehow know how to use a computer (for some reason), let me introduce you to "Villainous". This series follows a group of villains known as the Black Hat Organization, led by their leader Black Hat, along with his insane assistant Dementia (who already has her own cult following), a giant teddy bear named 5.0.5 (yes, really) who has absolutely nothing evil about him, and their lead scientist the neurotic Dr. Flug. Cartoon Network themselves actually seems to be very excited about the series, but so far it only exists as shorts for now, but that's how Mighty MagiSwords got its start and I like that show. The pace of this one is a bit less manic, but it's certainly worth a look. During my viewing of this series, I got a lot of Billy & Mandy flashbacks, but in a good way. It also kinda reminds me of The League of Super Evil, if the villains were actually competent. Guys, we've gotta help make this a thing and show the creators just how badly we WANT Infinity Train and Villainous. Right now, there's only a couple shorts in English but even if you don't understand Spanish you can still admire how amazing the animation looks and how much detail and effort went into this project.

2- The Slim Shady Show (AI)- I was originally planning on considering this one an Animation Unknown, only because the only AU review to ever receive a black bar was King Star King (and that was 20 reviews ago), but I think this might be the far easier option. I don't know if a lot of you guys know this, and I might get a lot of turbulence for this, but I'm actually a pretty big fan of Marshall "Eminem" Mathers and I enjoy quite a few of his songs. Hell, I didn't even hate Encore all the way through. Yeah, there's a lot of songs that I hear now and think "What the hell is this shit?" and I can see why even Em himself hated it enough to just disappear for almost a decade. This, however, probably had a lot more to do with that. Hell, at least Encore had songs like Mockingbird, Like Toy Soldiers, Puke (which my fans might recognize as the original ending theme for my Creepy Freaks video), and I still consider Just Lose it to be so bad, it's good; this show, however, ranks up there with Fack and pretty much the rest of the Encore album as some of the most unacceptable things Eminem has ever put out. The man who genuinely came off even more angry, violent, and dangerous as he said he was in his music, is here just making a tasteless, witless, cheap South Park clone. No literally, they straight up rip the boys FROM South Park in a shameless attempt at "satire". Granted, this was made in 2001 when Eminem was building popularity and South Park hadn't yet become a cultural juggernaut, but this is basically a watered-down inbred parody of a parody of a parody to the point that the animation looks more like something you'd find playing on a TV in the background of The Nutshack.

1- (Michael Conroy's) Alice in Wonderland (AI)- My long time fans that have been following my career from the beginning (or even before I was doing this whole review thing) will probably recognize this abomination as my third review ever, after Nutri-Ventures (which I revisited in one of my first Animation Unknown reviews) and Christmas is Here Again (which I revisited twice, both times for my Christmas Advent Calendar). However, this one managed to persistently come back to the forefront of my mind. I've looked at some really shitty, really cheap animation: crappy reboot after crappy reboot, shitty Flash animation, the witless, the offensive, the disturbing, the obnoxious, the arrogant, the regretful, and everything in between. Nothing could compare to this though. They literally just stole a public domain radio play AND SCRIBBLED SHITTY KINDERGARTEN DRAWINGS OVER EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that any of you out there, regardless of skill level, could do a better job than this. There's nothing that could possibly be any lower than this, even in Animation Infamy: Gilgamesh was reprehensible, Where the Dead go to Die was disturbing and horrible, Return of Slade pissed me off and offended me, Legends of Chamberlain Heights practically looks like Spirited Away in comparison. At least everything in that load of horse vomit was 100% originally made for that series. Hell, Seth MacFarlane's Cavalcade of Cartoon "Comedy" might be awful and not even remotely in the same definition as comedy or wit of any kind, but at least you could say that all of it was original footage animated and created by people with money. This was not created, this is plagiarism. This is the same thing as stealing a painting from a museum, wiping your ass with it after a violent case of diarrhea, and then having the balls to CHARGE people to look at it. Watch this online, these fucking swindlers don't deserve a PENNY of your hard-earned money and deserve less than an attosecond of your precious time.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to prepare for July. Hope everyone out there is having a great summer and I hope to post more reviews in the future. In the meantime, though, I have something special for next week. It's not a review thing, but it's something that I'm actually pretty proud of myself for.