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MJMJR — Zartan Biography

Published: 2013-12-28 05:33:49 +0000 UTC; Views: 4760; Favourites: 58; Downloads: 0
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Zartan

Real Name: Unknown.

Occupation: Mercenary, leader of the Dreadnoks

 

Aliases: Too numerous to list

Birthplace: Unknown, possibly Europe or Australia

Specialties: Master of disguise, espionage and assassinations

 

Known Relatives: Zarana (sister), Zandar (brother) and Zanya (daughter).

Group Affiliation: Dreadnoks, Cobra

 

Base of Operations: Australia, Florida, New Jersey, Numerous Cobra bases and Dreadnok hideouts.

History: Virtually nothing is known about Zartan’s past that can be considered anything but speculation. All attempts to delve into it have come up as dead-ends or unconfirmed. It is believed he has received military training, possibly at Saint Cyr but again this is just speculation.

 

Zartan has worked primarily as a mercenary and it was during this time that he was hired by Cobra Commander to assassinate Snake-Eyes whose family the Commander irrationally blamed for his brother’s death.

 

In reality Cobra Commander’s brother was drunk and caused a head on collision with another car on the highway. The family inside the other car was Snake- Eyes mother, father and baby sister who were on their way to the airport to pick up the war vet.

 

After the deaths of his family Snake-Eyes took an offer from his platoon mate Stormshadow (Thomas Arashikage) to live with him and his family’s ninja clan in Japan.

 

Cobra Commander was unable to exact his revenge himself due to his forming Cobra at the time and Snake-Eyes traveling to Japan so he first tried to hire the saboteur/assassin Firefly, but Firefly refused the assignment (due to his association with the Arashikage clan as the Faceless Master) but recommended the mercenary Zartan. Meeting him in a pool hall where he was spending time between jobs hustling people for money. Cobra Commander pitched Zartan the job and the mercenary was intrigued by the challenge of the assignment as well as the hefty payment and accepted. 

 

Zartan tracked Snake-Eyes to Japan and the Arashikage clan’s mountain fortress and entered the dojo as a student who wanted to learn sword making from the clan’s legendary sword smith Onihashi. Onihashi refused Zartan as his apprentice so to prove his seriousness and worthiness Zartan humbly kneeled outside of Oniashi’s door every day for six months before Onihashi granted him an audience.

 

Onihashi told Zartan that he knew he was a liar filled with bad karma but he accepted Zartan as his student believing Zartan could be forged into a better man and purged of his evilness.

 

For months Zartan spent time under Oniashi’s tutelage and forged an exceptionally strong and sharp sword as a gift for the Hard Master, leader of the Arashikage clan. No longer desiring to kill Snake-Eyes or feeling the need to prove himself to anyone, Zartan was going to remain with Onihashi and create swords he felt were true works of art.

 

Getting wind of this Cobra Commander threatened to expose Zartan to the clan and Onihashi for what he really was unless he carried out his assignment. Feeling he had no other option and not wanting to see harm come to Onihashi, Zartan, disguised as Stormshadow, stole one of Stormshadow’s arrows and used a high powered compound bow with an infrared heart-beat sensing scope that located its victims based on their specific heartbeats and heat patterns.

 

Unknown to Zartan at the time, Snake-Eyes was being trained by Stormshadow’s uncle, The Hard Master in the ninja technique called “Donning the Chameleon’s Mantel” a ninja technique that allows them to mimic another person right down to their breathing and heartbeat.

 

The Hard Master stood behind a wall inside the dojo and mimicked Snake-Eyes while tasking his student to deduce who he was mimicking. Zartan, his equipment fooled by the technique shot the arrow through the wall killing the Hard Master instantly.

 

Thinking his mission was accomplished Zartan fled with the help of Firefly who piloted their escape helicopter into the night.

 

The next day Zartan returned to Onihashi only to find his master had committed ritual suicide to atone for his student’s crime and his failure as a teacher to turn him from the wrong path. Stormshadow was blamed for his Uncle’s death due to Zartan’s use of Stormshadow’s arrow and was forced to flee the clan, which fell into disarray and largely disbanded because of the tragedy.

 

Zartan left Japan resigned to his fate as a criminal and resumed his mercenary ways while continuing to work under contract for Cobra. It’s unknown how or when he met the Dreadnoks or when he became their leader only that it happened sometime after he left Japan. Moving the gang from Australia to the Florida Everglades, Zartan set up a cabin in the swamp as his home and used an abandoned gas station on the edge of the swamp as the Dreadnok home base.

 

During this time Stormshadow infiltrated Cobra thinking it would lead him to his Uncle’s true killer. Thanks to his skills Stormshadow became Cobra Commanders personal bodyguard. When Cobra Commander was captured by GI Joe during a fierce battle Stormshadow was dispatched by the traitorous Major Bludd to rescue him.

 

Bludd planted a hidden homing device on Stormshadow’s sword and sent Wild Weasel and Firefly to track the ninja down and eliminate him and Cobra Commander. But unknown to Major Bludd, Stormshadow found the device and sent it to Zartan’s swamp base instead. When the duo broke into his shack Zartan easily subdued and imprisoned them until Cobra Commander escaped custody.

 

Cobra Commander then imprisoned Major Bludd and personally visited Zartan with the Baroness and Destro when a GI Joe recon team showed up following a lead they got from the captured Stormshadow. After a back and forth battle in the swamp the Joe team escaped and Zartan pursued them north to Maguire Air force Base in New Jersey.

 

Setting up a base in an abandoned gas station outside the New Jersey Pine Barrens Zartan was ordered by Cobra Commander to keep watch on Maguire for signs of GI Joe activity. Later that night Zartan sent his Dreadnoks Buzzer, Ripper and Torch to recon the base but unable to control their destructive urges the trio went inside the base and started vandalizing equipment.

 

During this time Cobra Commander sent a contingent of Cobra armor and aircraft to deploy near the base for a sneak attack but thanks to the Dreadnok Buzzer accidentally blowing up a plane the entire base went on full alert. The Dreadnoks escaped while Cobra, the air force base personnel and GI Joe fought until Cobra was forced to retreat.

 

Believing Stormshadow had been captured by the GI Joe team, Cobra Commander hired Zartan and the Dreadnoks to be his personal bodyguards until Stormshadow returned. Arriving in Springfield, a Midwestern town that was secretly a Cobra base, Cobra Commander held a rally where he was saved from being assassinated by his young son Billy who had been conspiring with Baroness and Major Bludd to overthrow the Commander.

 

At a tribunal Zartan and Stormshadow were present when Cobra Commander and Destro interrogated his son demanding he name his conspirators. When he refused Billy was subjected to a device called the Brainwave Scanner but before the machine could break him Stormshadow freed Billy and the two escaped Springfield.

 

While this was happening Buzzer, Ripper and Torch stole Zartan’s brand new hologram producing motorcycle and took it for a joyride. Getting wind of this Zartan left Springfield as well and went in pursuit of his gang eventually getting his motorcycle back but not before the vacationing GI Joes Grunt and Rock & Roll captured Buzzer and took him into custody.

 

Zartan then traveled to the Gulf of Mexico with Cobra Commander and his scientists aboard a Cobra freight ship where they used advanced technology to raise an enormous land mass from the sea floor and made it a sovereign island nation under Cobra’s rule.

 

Meanwhile Buzzer escapes G.I. Joe headquarters The Pitt and takes Candy, the girlfriend of Joe paratrooper Ripcord as a hostage on his way out. Buzzer makes his way back to Springfield and Candy escapes and meets with the Soft Master, who was searching for the killer of his brother and Billy, Cobra Commander’s son. The Candy and Soft Master are killed trying to escape Springfield by Scrap Iron and Bill is maimed but survives.

Needing information on Cobra Island and it defenses General Hawk has Ripcord infiltrate the island at night but despite his precautions Ripcord is ambushed by Zartan after a lengthy fire fight and knocked unconscious.

 

Zartan switches outfits with Ripcord and disguises himself as the Joe and gets picked up by his extraction team while the still knocked-out Ripcord, dressed as Zartan is sent back to Springfield to treat his injuries and prevent him from being killed by Snake-Eyes and Stormshadow who had infiltrated the island separately from the Joe team seeking revenge on Zartan.

 

Zartan, now inside the Pitt, uses a series of disguises to make his way out of the Pit so that he can give it’s location to Cobra. Despite his mastery of disguise Zartan is discovered and knocked out by Sergeant Slaughter.

 

While this is happening Ripcord awakens in Springfield and manages to call in to the Pitt before being discovered and captured. General Hawk mounts an attack on the town and rescues Ripcord but his forces are held off by the newly created Cobra Emperor Serpentor whose forces hold off the Joes long enough for Baroness and Destro to evacuate the town and set off the self-destruct protocols that level the town.

 

Reuniting with his fellow Dreadnoks Buzzer reveals the location of the Pitt to Zarana and Zandar, Zartan’s younger sister and brother as well as the newly returned Thrasher. Taking charge of the gang Zarana successfully rescues Zartan from the Pitt and escape into the New Jersey Swamps.

 

Zartan and the Dreadnoks are then hired by Cobra Commander to assassinate Serpentor disguised as GI Joes. Destro helps foil the assassination attempt in order to protect the Baroness and Serpentor uses the attack to whip Cobra into an anti-GI Joe frenzy. Zartan then gives the location of the Pitt to Serpentor and orders an all out assault on the Joe headquarters which ends with its destruction and Cobra Commander and Destro are presumed to have been killed in the collapse.

 

Escaping the destruction of the Pitt, Destro and Cobra Commander make their way out and go their separate ways once they arrive in Colorado. Cobra Commander travels to a Colorado based Crimson Guard sleeper agent called Fred Smith VII who has been taking care of the recovered Billy and built him a prosthetic leg as well as an armored suit for Cobra Commander.

 

Emotionally broken after Billy rejects him Cobra Commander vows to give up his life as a terrorist leader and disband Cobra. Fred becomes furious that the cause he dedicated his life to would mean nothing if Cobra disbands shoots Cobra Commander, buries him in a shallow grave and dons the Commander’s battle armor himself and takes over his identity

 

Back on Cobra Island Zartan is present when Cobra Commander II arrives and after a time he correctly surmised Cobra Commander was an imposter but like the Baroness he sided with the faux Commander in the hopes of gaining more power within Cobra.

 

When Cobra Island erupted into a civil war between Cobra Commander and Serpentor, as well as the invading GI Joe force Zartan and the Dreadnoks served as Cobra Commander’s personal body guards. During the war Zartan became upset that the Commander was risking his men’s lives without giving them proper support and tried to reach his men but he was too late to prevent them from being captured by the GI Joes. 

Zarana escapes capture and makes her way back to Zartan and both go back to Cobra Commander to inform him that the Joes broke through the western front. With the Joes, Serpentor and Destro closing in from all sides Cobra Commander becomes overwhelmed and is unable to devise a plan.

Disgusted by the Commander’s bad choices and inability to make a decisive battle plans Zartan spies Serpentor’s tank column approaching. Jumping atop a wrecked tank, Zartan shoots the would-be conqueror through the eye with an arrow from his compound bow ending the civil war single handed.

With a cease fire in effect on Cobra Island the Dreadnoks are released as part of the peace treaty. Zartan is present on the beach with the other Dreadnoks when Zarana and Lady Jaye got into a brutal fist fight over comments Zarana made about her. The fight was eventually broken up by the Joes and Dreadnoks after the two combatants exhausted themselves. Zartan and Zandar physically restrain their sister Zarana and drag her away from the fight.

 

Afterwards Zarana and Zandar begin running a real estate scheme on Cobra’s behalf and Zartan is put in charge of the Cobra Consulate Building and travels back and forth between the building and Cobra Island.

 

Fearing that Zartan is becoming too much on a threat to their ambitions and could possibly discover  the Commander’s real identity and collapsing their schemes Cobra Commander II leads an assassination squad to his base on Cobra Island but Zartan, with a cadre of red ninjas at his command easily stops the squad and captures Cobra Commander II. Zartan reveals he had long ago deduced the impostor’s true identity and proved he wasn’t a threat by not revealing it to anyone and as long as Cobra Commander II respected his privacy and made no further attempts on his life Zartan would extend him the same courtesy and Cobra Commander II agrees to this truce and released.

 

Zartan, fearing Stormshadow is still seeking revenge on him for killing the Hard Master departs Cobra Island with is Red Ninja Squad to hunt down and kill the ninja master in San Francisco. Despite their superior numbers Zartan’s squad is killed and he seemingly drowned when the van he was chasing Stormshadow in crashed off a bridge.

 

Months later Zartan resurfaces in San Francisco searching for Stormshadow once again only to be stalked himself by the Blind Master, who is furious at Zartan for killing his mentor the Hard Master. Zartan and the Blind Master have a no holds barred brawl in a back alley. About to kill the badly beaten Zartan the Blind Master relents when his young student Tyrone stops him and argues that if the Blind Master kills Zartan his soul will be corrupted by committing a murder for revenge.

 

The Blind Master relents but sends Tyrone from the alley. After the boy leaves Zartan, still enraged from the furious fight grabs a knife and stabs the Blind Master in the back fatally wounding him. Dying, the Blind Master repents his acts of savagery and implores Zartan to do the same after he reveals that Zartan’s former mentor Professor Onihashi forgave him before he died.

 

Momentarily moved by the Hard Master’s words Zartan assumes the Hard Master’s identity and joins Tyrone outside the alley. Later Tyrone and Zartan (still disguised as the Hard Master) meets up with Billy and Raptor and they travel to Cobra Island to get revenge on Cobra Commander II for his previous assassination attempt and to have Doctor Mindbender make a clone of the original Commander to regain control of Cobra.

 

In the midst of their coup the true Cobra Commander arrives on Cobra Island with an army of loyalist Crimson Guardsmen and after successfully captures them. The true Cobra Commander then reveals that he was still alive when he was buried in Colorado and only his failsafe plan of having each Crimson Guard spied on by another saved him when the Guard assigned to spy on Fred VII unburied the wounded Commander and nursed him back to health.

 

Paranoid and completely deranged Cobra Commander then rounds up Zartan, Billy, Tyrone, Croc Master, Cobra Commander II, Raptor, Doctor Mindbender, Firefly and dozens of other troops that were still loyal to Cobra Commander II and seals them all inside a landlocked freighter ship on the island before burying it beneath a rockslide essentially burying his betrayers alive much like he was.

 

Inside the buried ship Zartan quickly takes charge of the survivors and has them start working in shifts to dig an escape tunnel out of the ship before their supply of C-Rations and water runs out.

 

Unknown to the survivors a great many of the rations had spoiled and everyone but Zartan and Billy succumbed to botulism and died an agonizing death. Finishing the tunnel Zartan and Billy escaped. Meanwhile Firefly faked dying from the tainted food and once Zartan and Billy had escaped, he dressed a corpse in his uniform and fled Cobra Island.

 

Much later Cobra Commander sends a team of Vipers into the buried freighter to exterminate anyone that could still be alive only for them to discover the escape tunnel and the missing bodies of Zartan and Billy.

Zartan and Billy arrive at Castle Destro in Scotland in a stolen Cobra jet deeming Destro the most honorable of the ex Cobra lieutenants and seek his help. By sheer coincidence Cobra Commander begins to implement a revenge scheme on Destro at the same time.

 

Getting wind of this the GI Joe team dispatch a unit to monitor the castle and aid Destro if he is attacked. When Cobra finally attacks Zartan and Billy end up rescuing the Joes as well as Destro and they escape the destruction of the castle by helicopter while the Baroness is captured by Cobra and taken prisoner.

 

Cobra Commander then puts a bounty on Destro’s head and Zartan and Billy along with the Joes protect him until Stormshadow and the rest of the GI Joe ninja force arrive. Begrudgingly Zartan and Stormshadow work together to keep Destro safe until he places a virus into Cobra’s computer networks and begins deleting their funds. Destro uses this to end Cobra Commander’s bounty as well as get the Baroness back from Cobra.

 

With the threat ended Zartan and Billy slip away and the two go their separate ways. Weeks later Zartan is hired by Destro to help him retake the rebuilt Castle Destro with a small Joe force from Cobra’s forces who still occupy it. During the confrontation Destro reveals the castle has the ability to transform from Silent Castle mode, which is a modern fortress to Castle Destro, which is a more traditional castle design.

 

Mistaking the castle’s transformation signal as signs of another Transformer being in the area a damaged Megatron arrives hoping to find another of his kind only to be offered a deal by Cobra Commander. In exchange for building him a new body Megatron offers to give Cobra access to their advanced technology.

 

This resulted in a short lived alliance between Cobra and the Decepticons while the Autobots team with the GI Joe team to thwart their efforts which results in the Decepticons abandoning Cobra without giving them access to their advanced tech and Destro regaining control over his castle.

 

Realizing he needs his top minds and advisors on his side again Cobra Commander has his scientists activate a fail-safe in Dr. Mindbenders cloning equipment that will clone Mindbender and download a back-up of Mindbender’s mind into its brain.

 

Once more alive Mindbender reveals that he had secretly implanted control chips in Destro and Zartan’s brains to insure their loyalty and the devices will only be triggered upon seeing the unmasked Cobra Commander’s face.

 

Arriving at Castle Destro at the same time his son Billy had stopped by to visit Cobra Commander unmasks and immediately enthralls Destro and Zartan. The Baroness and Billy attempt to rescue them but are instead captured and subjected to a modified version of Doctor Venom’s brainwave scanner to also make them loyal to Cobra once more.

 

Briefly breaking free of the scanner Billy alerts the GI Joe team before being recaptured. Stormshadow, now on the side of GI Joe attempts to rescue Billy only to be captured and subjected to the scanner as well. With his lieutenants and son firmly back in his grasp Cobra Commander set out for Cobra Island to plot further schemes.

 

Months later Zartan returns to the Dreadnok garage in the New Jersey Pine Barrens. Disguised as a police officer Zartan enters the garage to test the Dreadnoks alertness and fighting skills after his long absence. Zartan easily dispatched his Dreadnoks in hand to hand combat and then revealed himself to his gang.

Disappointed with their performance Zartan admonished the Dreadnoks for being so easily beaten as well as not having the Thundermachine road worthy. Getting back to work under his watchful eye the Dreadnoks finished rebuilding and upgrading the Thundermachine as Zartan radioed Cobra Commander at Broca Beach to send supplies to the garage.

The Baroness was dispatched to bring the supplies to the garage but noticed she was being tailed by GI Joes Lady Jaye and Torpedo. Ramming the Joes VAMP jeep off the road Baroness wrecked her vehicle and theirs and attempted to kill the trapped Torpedo but was beaten up by Lady Jaye and captured.

Sensing the Baroness was long overdue with their supplies meant the gas station was compromised, Zartan ordered the Dreadnoks to pack up their things and “sterilize” the gas station to cover their tracks. Zartan and the Dreadnoks then helped Destro track the Baroness to the GI Joe team’s new headquarters and successfully rescued her.

 

Returning to the gas station hideout Zartan and the Dreadnoks got hired by Cobra Commander to eliminate a rouge group of disgruntled Crimson Guardsmen who were planning a terrorist attack on America Land Amusement Park. Unknown to Cobra and Zartan a GI Joe team was observing the Gas Station and intercepted the communication about the rouge Crimson Guardsmen’s terrorist plot.

 

Both the Joes and Zartan foiled the plot saving the civilians at the park from the terrorist attack but Zartan and the Dreadnoks escaped before they could be captured.

 

Later Zartan and the Dreadnoks became embroiled in a three way battle in the Republic of Benzheen between Darklon, Colonel Faroud and the GI Joe team to prevent Darklon and Faroud from keeping and testing a nuclear device called the Virtual Kryton.

 

When the Joe team learned the Kryton was a fake they abandoned their mission. Stealing the Kryton, Zartan and the Dreadnoks almost escaped before the former emir and his loyalists captured Darklon and Colonel Faroud and took back power. Demanding the Kryton in exchange for their freedom Zartan was forced to relent and give the Emir the device and escape.

 

Zartan and the Dreadnoks are currently at large and working for Cobra whenever their price is met.

Height: approximately 6’
Weight: unknown
Eyes: usually Green / variable
Hair: Usually Redhead/Variable

Strength Level: Zartan possesses the normal human strength of a man of his age, height and build who engages in intensive regular exercise.

Special Skills and Abilities: Zartan is a master of disguise with the ability to mimic most anyone’s appearance using classic special effects make-up, using sophisticated holographic technology or combinations of the two.

 

Zartan has undergone experimental surgeries to give his skin the chameleon like ability to blend in with its surroundings. This combined with his hologram technology can render him virtually invisible in any given environment.

 

Zartan is able to make custom holographic projection equipment for his vehicles that can produce realistic 3D holograms able to disguise it or groups within close proximity to the projector itself as any number of vehicles he chooses.

 

Zartan has the ability to mimic a person’s voice upon hearing them speak only once and is also a ventriloquist and a linguist who is fluent in over 20 languages and dialects.

 

Zartan knows several martial arts disciplines and combines them in his fighting style. He is adept enough with these skills to hold his own against ninja masters or several attackers at the same time.

 

Zartan is skilled at sword making, using bow and arrows and conventional guns, rifles and pistols. Zartan is an excellent marksman able to hit a moving target from hundreds of yards away with a single arrow.

 

Zartan is also adept at bomb making and acts of sabotage.

Weapons: Zartan’s primary weapon of choice is a customized high powered compound bow. The bow has an infrared heart-beat sensing scope attachment that can target its victims based on their specific heartbeats and heat patterns.

Transportation: Zartan has a custom built Harley Davidson equipped with holographic projectors able to disguise the rider and any vehicles close enough to it as larger land vehicles. For instance if Zartan has the other Dreadnoks ride close enough to his motorcycle on their motorcycles his bike can project the illusion that a tractor trailer or a city bus is there instead of a biker gang.

 

Zartan also employs a vehicle called the Chameleon Swamp Skier which is a micro-jet powered single-person water craft based on a motorcycle design. The lightweight tubular frame and fiberglass body sits on four heavy duty skis and has a forward mounted high pressure water cannons and rear mounted wide spray ink nozzles that can blind pursuers.

 

The Chameleon can be disassembled and be disguised as a cart full of scrap metal and junk.

 

Zartan also makes use of other vehicles in the Dreadnoks and Cobra arsenal as needed.

 

Limitations: Due to the surgeries he underwent to gain his camouflage/mimicry ability Zartan’s skin can become sensitive to direct sunlight which causes him discomfort or pain depending on the intensity of the ultra violet rays he’s exposed to.

 

 Zartan’s eyes are also sensitive to light which necessitates his wearing special lenses on his face mask that adjust to changes in light and filter out ultra violet rays.

 

Zartan, Dreadnoks and above mentions characters and places copyright Hasbro. 


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Comments: 13

DARKZADAR-ZERO [2014-08-09 16:38:34 +0000 UTC]

impressive i remember reading some of those comics !

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MJMJR In reply to DARKZADAR-ZERO [2014-08-09 23:48:46 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! I figured he needed a decent bio since everyone seems to just cop-out on giving him one to play up the mystery of the character. 

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DARKZADAR-ZERO In reply to MJMJR [2014-08-11 02:51:37 +0000 UTC]

your welcome ! 

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fletcherc [2013-12-30 17:06:17 +0000 UTC]

What the hell ...?!

I knew Zartan was a pretty important guy in the GI Joe universe but this is just crazy! How long did it take you to get all this information together?! Wow ... just wow.

 

And even though the movies are crap: I loved the fact that they got Arnold Vosloo to play Zartan ...

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MJMJR In reply to fletcherc [2013-12-30 19:16:00 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, he's always more than what he seems.


It took me a few months because I had to wait for the Classic GI Joe volumes to all come out so I could scan through them for info.


I liked Vosloo as Zartan. I had no complaint about him or most of the actors chosen for the most part(except Ripcord). They just totally ruined everything in those films. 

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fletcherc In reply to MJMJR [2013-12-30 19:35:33 +0000 UTC]

Oh dear. Please don't ever try to become a comedian ...


I watched the first one just because Ray Park was in it. Suddenly seeing Arnold Vosloo on the screen was a nice surprise. I'm not that familiar with the characters and the original story so I was probably not as disappointed as you were.

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MJMJR In reply to fletcherc [2013-12-30 19:45:09 +0000 UTC]

I won't


Honestly I could go on a crazy rant about how Duke never dated or went to school with The Baroness ever, Duke was never friends with Cobra Commander, Cobra Commander never served in the US military nor has his real face ever been fully shown, Ripcord is a white guy with reddish brown hair and was never a smart ass.... but I won't bore you with all the facts.


The only relationships they came close to getting right were Destro and Baroness and Snake-Eyes and Stormshadow. 

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fletcherc In reply to MJMJR [2013-12-30 20:11:00 +0000 UTC]

I know how you feel. I mean you know how I can rant about the things they did to my favourite video games or comic book characters. So you go ahead, rant away ...


For GI Joe I always thought that a TV series would be best. Something high budget with a dedicated team of writers who know the original stuff. And some good actors of course. But that will probably never come.

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MJMJR In reply to fletcherc [2013-12-31 18:40:09 +0000 UTC]

Honestly I listed most of what I hated about it. The only other thing that pissed me off was the super suits they had them wearing and how insanely advanced they made all of their equipment. Okay, granted the toys and comics they have some advanced vehicles and robots even but it's nothing that looks like it would be at home in a Star Wars movie zipping through space and nobody wears super suits that makes them leap around like Spider-Man.


The sequel was even worse. They slaughter everyone just to rip off that crappy GI Joe Renegades cartoon. It just sickens me how they can't just stick to the most popular element of GI Joe, which was the 80s cartoon and Marvel Comics, and adapt them faithfully.


If someone did do a live action GI Joe show they'd almost have to do it the same way AMC adapts The Walking Dead comics. Start with the original Joes in issue 1 of the Marvel Comic and work their way through the comics story by story and adapt them into seasons.  If they did that the show would be a massive hit esepcially if they kept it in the same era that it started so not only are the Joes facing Cobra they are also contending with the Russians during the cold war. 


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fletcherc In reply to MJMJR [2014-01-04 18:59:17 +0000 UTC]

It's strange how they always think they must exaggerate everything in the movies. As if the original story in the book isn't good enough or something.


The Walking Dead adaptation was pretty good. A rare exception considering all the other crap we see in movies and on TV thesedays. 


Hm, I wonder who would get casted for a GI Joe TV show. Do you have any actors on mind?

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MJMJR In reply to fletcherc [2014-01-06 01:45:04 +0000 UTC]

Well I mean in some cases it works out better. Like Jaws the film is way better than the book in a lot of ways because of the changes Spielberg made. Same with a lot of Stephen King's novels that are converted into films. But when it comes to a comic book the story is already drawn out visually. Its pretty much been made into a storyboard that a director or writer can follow. There's no real need to do major tweaking or rewrites.


I know. I can not wait for the rest of the season to start this month. I'm excited to see which characters pop up next.


Honestly I don't know but I would probably go with actors that haven't been in a lot of stuff that can really get into being the characters.

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TheOracleDragon [2013-12-28 05:56:20 +0000 UTC]

I love it when you do things like this about characters I know but know nothing of their information or history, I wouldn't have even guessed some of this stuff about it. Zartan was one of our favorites in the G.I. Joe movie. Haha, so awesome!

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MJMJR In reply to TheOracleDragon [2013-12-28 12:56:53 +0000 UTC]

Thank you, this one took forever to get done because he pops up in so many issues. I actually had to streamline a lot of what I wrote about his appearances in the comics or else this thing would have been 20 pages long instead of 10.  


I mostly like doing these because nobody ever really gives these characters a proper handbook style biography. They almost always just copy what's on the file card and then leave it at that instead of going by the Marvel Comics which are all written by the guy who created the characters.


You can't go by the movies when it comes to GI Joe, they screwed up way too many things.

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