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Published: 2014-03-12 12:52:26 +0000 UTC; Views: 11831; Favourites: 439; Downloads: 0
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The strangest commission I've ever got.
Pfft--
Like seriously.
This is some funny shit man. I have no idea.
He was utterly in love with her. It was the blossoming of a love filled romance between...
Two potatoes.
They lay together in the packet, whispering sweet nothings into eachother's ears. There were also other potatoes there, but they paid them no attention. To them.... They were alone with each other. Just the two of them.
But their situation wasnt exactly the best. What had once been a date in the fields, had somehow came to this. They were hostages. Doitsu the potato, and [Your Name], the potato, were in a grave situation. They held onto eachother like a life line, wanting nothing more than to just go home. They wished to rip out of the packet, and walk back to their field and continue their lives as normal.
But alas... Potatoes have no hands or legs.
And suddenly, the packet was ripped open. Giant fingers plunged into the bag, picking up some of the other victims of this horrible crime. Doitsu the potato held onto his wife, holding tightly as she cried onto his rough skin.
But it was his turn. Doitsu was torn away from his lover, screaming at the top of his potato lungs. She screamed after him, but could not move a muscle. She could not grab onto him and pull her potato back.
For he was already gone.
And for the next five minutes or so, his screams echoed throughout the entire room, accompanied by a soft 'splat' everynow and then. But eventually... All was quiet.
He had became mashed potato.
He died an honourable, but brutal death.
Related content
Comments: 195
ASHdoodle01 [2014-03-13 23:28:02 +0000 UTC]
Oh my... *SOBS* MY FEELS!!! I-I *sniff*... I spilled table all over my feels...
...
Does anyone have a tissue...? *cries*
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ChibiMooshi [2014-03-13 23:02:36 +0000 UTC]
Oh my gosh, this is so touching My poor heart is broken
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
CartoonfanKatieM In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 20:17:06 +0000 UTC]
So sad.
Live on, Potato Bride. Live on to have his little Potato babeh's.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
CartoonfanKatieM In reply to RolllingGirl [2014-03-13 20:15:43 +0000 UTC]
I have never wanted to a comment more in my life.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
vivizia [2014-03-13 15:18:51 +0000 UTC]
This is the most tragic and heartbreaking story I've ever read 5/5 STARS
AMAZING
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
somebodyoranybody In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 14:02:25 +0000 UTC]
The tragedy, the feelings, the horror. It´s so full of romance, love and deep emotion. You are the master of potato prose, the creator of potato prose. I hope that one day you will win the golden bowl of mashed potatoes and ride of into the sunset with the potato you love. My deepest respect your majesty.
No You really wrote it nicely. Crackfics are had to pull of and you did it very well. It is funny yet honest at the same time. Well done!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ieatpastalol In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 13:58:27 +0000 UTC]
THIS
THIS IS THE BEST SHIP FIC EVER
, THIS IS HOW YOU WRITE SHIP FICS IN YOUR HIATUS
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SarakuHD [2014-03-13 12:39:36 +0000 UTC]
How the HELL.
You managed to mkae some VERY, VERRRY weird shit.
That got into the front page... Congrats...? I don't know if you want anybody else other than your watchers to see this random shit..
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
MuffledScreaming In reply to SarakuHD [2014-03-13 16:25:11 +0000 UTC]
Wait-- It got onto the front page?
Wait what--
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SarakuHD In reply to MuffledScreaming [2014-03-13 16:31:50 +0000 UTC]
Mmhmm....
It was there earlier, I don't think its there now
But seriously, this is weird..
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
MuffledScreaming In reply to SarakuHD [2014-03-13 16:38:32 +0000 UTC]
Yeah... *sigh*
One of my friends decided to commission be with the weirdest request that she could think of in order to creep out my watchers or something.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SarakuHD In reply to MuffledScreaming [2014-03-13 17:10:50 +0000 UTC]
Well, no offence to them, but I think they need to see someone.. JK.
Anyways, congrats on being able to make it to the front page!Though I think you would've preferred it was something else..
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ImmortalVantasy In reply to ImmortalVantasy [2014-03-13 11:32:16 +0000 UTC]
Dis is beauty. but I imagine my sister with it. HEHEHEH
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
SpikeyMacksy In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 10:01:24 +0000 UTC]
`oh my god.
this is one of the saddest x reader fics i've read
I'm not being sarcastic
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
IanabelleIsaK In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 08:46:07 +0000 UTC]
OMG, you made me cry over a potaoe love story.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
helenadoodle In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 06:37:09 +0000 UTC]
omg I'm crying that was beautiful
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
LovelyDragoness In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 05:10:30 +0000 UTC]
Wow, this crack fic. Now I have an humorous attachment to potatoes.
I won't look at dinner the same without chuckling.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Cry0freeze In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 04:14:49 +0000 UTC]
Wow
So much sad
So much funny
Potato crack pairing
Wow
xD
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
wolfstar-e99 In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 03:45:01 +0000 UTC]
this made my night so much better
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Master-Oresama In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 02:28:55 +0000 UTC]
well....this thingy made the front page...congratulations. I'M NOT JEALOUS AT ALL....
As you can see from the icon, I am NOT turning green with envy. Nope. not at ALL.
Lol, jk, I'm happy for you man.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
MuffledScreaming In reply to Master-Oresama [2014-03-13 16:26:10 +0000 UTC]
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS GOT ON THE FRONT PAGE--
WHAT--
REALLY!?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Master-Oresama In reply to MuffledScreaming [2014-03-13 22:57:46 +0000 UTC]
Uhh....yea. I saw it when I logged on. congrats!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
JarateKid In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 01:46:25 +0000 UTC]
This made my heart go doki doki XD and gave me so many feels XDDD *sobbu*
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Morigami27 In reply to ??? [2014-03-13 01:14:04 +0000 UTC]
Love it. That is the funniest reader insert I've read.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Naftalina25 [2014-03-13 01:05:27 +0000 UTC]
Nice potato dude, I feel like I've seen it somewhere before.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
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