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Description
"Going to the movies used to be an experience. It used to be a family affair or an event, whereas now people will go see movies just because they said it's gonna be #1 and everybody knows the movie's bad."
Anthony Mackie.

Do film critics still matter? No, of course they don't.
That's the short answer, but let's get into the long answer.

I recently put a pull on DA that asked this very question. The feedback was squarely between ‘No’ and ‘It depends on what the subject is.’ Thank you for taking part in the poll. What I have to say next is my own subjective viewpoint on the matter.

If I’m going to remember 2023’s cinema for anything in particular, it’ll be the adaptations of the Super Mario Bros and Five Nights at Freddy’s franchises. While I have my critiques with those films, I still came away thoroughly entertained and look forward to owning both on DVD down the line. They also appear to have attracted a large amount of negative reception from so-called ‘movie critics’ and absolute cretins who still use Rotten Tomatoes as the undisputed word of God when it comes to entertainment.

People speculate that the negative reception these movies received was because they didn’t get the references, they wanted to be contrarian or because of two people involved's personal views (Chris Pratt and Scott Cawthon). However, I have a different theory on the matter (and no it's not a Game Theory). The moment the creative teams behind Mario and FNAF’s film adaptations made the bold declaration of “being for the fans,” I knew critics would get sand in their vagina's over it.

“Movies in Current Year that’s made for fanbases of beloved franchises, when they should be virtue signalling and flexing their rainbow capitalism for Twitter parasites?? NOT ON OUR WATCH!!”

The thing you have to remember about movie critiques, reviews and criticism is that every opinion is subjective. It is not the absolute truth and does not define an experience you may have. People I disagree with -both online and offline- are allowed to have one; even if I end up respectfully disagreeing with them.

For instance: I consider Batman & Robin one of the best movies to be ever made, whereas I would rather drink a glass of piss (also known as Budweiser) than sit through Avengers: Endgame ever again. That is a highly subjective opinion, I will grant you that, whereas unlike some folks online, I won't tell you "you’re wrong if you disagree with me!"

I remember something somebody told me a long time ago: “I don’t speak for you. NO ONE should speak for you! You have your own voice and the longer you let other people do your talking, the quieter your voice will soon become.”

As I mentioned in the Mario movie fallout, the tide is now turning on superhero movies -which these critics spent a decade getting invested in while pretending to be comic fans- and now the video game movie is on the rise, they're left like fishes out of water.

Calling Five Nights at Freddy's “the worst movie ever” seems like a monstrous over-exaggeration, because I sat through Ant-Man & the Wasp: Quantumania earlier this year and if there was any movie worthy of that dishonour, then it would be that. I say that because I have zero intention of watching The Marvels in a couple of weeks and you couldn’t Commission me to watch the Flash.

If you were to ask me what ‘the worst movie ever’ was, I’d say it’s a tie between Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, Transformers: The Last Knight or Spice World.

I know it's very easy to dismiss a lot of professional movie reviewers as “bought out shills of the Walt Disney corporation.” ... If you're waiting for a but in that statement, then there isn't one.

The one example I bring up on why I don't trust movie critics is the coverage of the infamous movie “Cuties.” The fact they creamed their jeans over it is all you really need to know why I don't take any of their views seriously. As for Youtube reviews, some I enjoy and agree with, while others leave avoiding their content like Angry Joe avoids a salad bar.

In the end, there's only one lesson to take away from all of this nonsense: If a movie is profitable and makes back its budget with gusto, then it really doesn't matter what people have to say about it.

"In Hollywood, remember, kids: It is not important if it's high quality, only if it makes money."
Mark Hamill.

Considering FNAF’s grossed around $130.6 million (at time of writing) in less than a week kinda cements that feeling. What drives the stake even further is when you remember the countless sequels to Twilight, Michael Bay's Transformers and the Fast in the Furious really lets you know what studios and audiences think of “critical reception.”

So to answer the question of “do movie critics still matter?” As long as a movie is profitable, the answer is a resounding NO.

I have a feeling we’ll be seeing this bullshit again when more video game movies show up and adopt Mario and FNAF’s design philosophy. Quote me on that.

Description
"Going to the movies used to be an experience. It used to be a family affair or an event, whereas now people will go see movies just because they said it's gonna be #1 and everybody knows the movie's bad."
Anthony Mackie.

Do film critics still matter? No, of course they don't.
That's the short answer, but let's get into the long answer.

I recently put a pull on DA that asked this very question. The feedback was squarely between ‘No’ and ‘It depends on what the subject is.’ Thank you for taking part in the poll. What I have to say next is my own subjective viewpoint on the matter.

If I’m going to remember 2023’s cinema for anything in particular, it’ll be the adaptations of the Super Mario Bros and Five Nights at Freddy’s franchises. While I have my critiques with those films, I still came away thoroughly entertained and look forward to owning both on DVD down the line. They also appear to have attracted a large amount of negative reception from so-called ‘movie critics’ and absolute cretins who still use Rotten Tomatoes as the undisputed word of God when it comes to entertainment.

People speculate that the negative reception these movies received was because they didn’t get the references, they wanted to be contrarian or because of two people involved's personal views (Chris Pratt and Scott Cawthon). However, I have a different theory on the matter (and no it's not a Game Theory). The moment the creative teams behind Mario and FNAF’s film adaptations made the bold declaration of “being for the fans,” I knew critics would get sand in their vagina's over it.

“Movies in Current Year that’s made for fanbases of beloved franchises, when they should be virtue signalling and flexing their rainbow capitalism for Twitter parasites?? NOT ON OUR WATCH!!”

The thing you have to remember about movie critiques, reviews and criticism is that every opinion is subjective. It is not the absolute truth and does not define an experience you may have. People I disagree with -both online and offline- are allowed to have one; even if I end up respectfully disagreeing with them.

For instance: I consider Batman & Robin one of the best movies to be ever made, whereas I would rather drink a glass of piss (also known as Budweiser) than sit through Avengers: Endgame ever again. That is a highly subjective opinion, I will grant you that, whereas unlike some folks online, I won't tell you "you’re wrong if you disagree with me!"

I remember something somebody told me a long time ago: “I don’t speak for you. NO ONE should speak for you! You have your own voice and the longer you let other people do your talking, the quieter your voice will soon become.”

As I mentioned in the Mario movie fallout, the tide is now turning on superhero movies -which these critics spent a decade getting invested in while pretending to be comic fans- and now the video game movie is on the rise, they're left like fishes out of water.

Calling Five Nights at Freddy's “the worst movie ever” seems like a monstrous over-exaggeration, because I sat through Ant-Man & the Wasp: Quantumania earlier this year and if there was any movie worthy of that dishonour, then it would be that. I say that because I have zero intention of watching The Marvels in a couple of weeks and you couldn’t Commission me to watch the Flash.

If you were to ask me what ‘the worst movie ever’ was, I’d say it’s a tie between Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, Transformers: The Last Knight or Spice World.

I know it's very easy to dismiss a lot of professional movie reviewers as “bought out shills of the Walt Disney corporation.” ... If you're waiting for a but in that statement, then there isn't one.

The one example I bring up on why I don't trust movie critics is the coverage of the infamous movie “Cuties.” The fact they creamed their jeans over it is all you really need to know why I don't take any of their views seriously. As for Youtube reviews, some I enjoy and agree with, while others leave avoiding their content like Angry Joe avoids a salad bar.

In the end, there's only one lesson to take away from all of this nonsense: If a movie is profitable and makes back its budget with gusto, then it really doesn't matter what people have to say about it.

"In Hollywood, remember, kids: It is not important if it's high quality, only if it makes money."
Mark Hamill.

Considering FNAF’s grossed around $130.6 million (at time of writing) in less than a week kinda cements that feeling. What drives the stake even further is when you remember the countless sequels to Twilight, Michael Bay's Transformers and the Fast in the Furious really lets you know what studios and audiences think of “critical reception.”

So to answer the question of “do movie critics still matter?” As long as a movie is profitable, the answer is a resounding NO.

I have a feeling we’ll be seeing this bullshit again when more video game movies show up and adopt Mario and FNAF’s design philosophy. Quote me on that.