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Published: 2008-08-10 07:15:24 +0000 UTC; Views: 2608; Favourites: 46; Downloads: 10
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Surrender:AbsolutionBrother, I am finished.
I will fight no more forever.
I'm wearied so of war; of watching
Bright lives coldly severed
We turned our backs; I walked away
In anger from my brother.
But walking 'round the world just brought us
Back to face each other.
In you I see the opposite
Of everything in me.
Bound in that opposition,
We've never yet been free.
There's no hope of forgiveness
For all we've said and done.
But understanding might make space
For love where there was none.
So I come to you, my brother:
My Other Self, my Friend –
The mirrored image I must face
At every cycle's end –
I come to you in hope
That if we join our souls together,
Unite our mirrored dreams and pains,
We could end this War forever.
I must be strong for others;
But you know me through and through.
There's no one else to help me now.
I need you, oh I need you!
I'll open to you my utmost self.
(Please help me not to be afraid!)
I'll hold back nothing – even shame.
(My pride's the price which must be paid.)
So lay down anger, hate and fear;
Lay down your misery;
Lay down regret and loneliness,
And give them all to me.
I'll bear your burdens; you'll bear mine.
We'll offer up our grief.
When we are one, we're strong.
Let go, and in me find relief.
Then at last we'll walk together;
Side-by-side we'll find our peace.
We've long led throngs to war and hate.
Let's lead them now to cease.
So hold me and enfold me.
Let the peace with us begin.
I'm ready to lay down this fight.
I love you.
Come on in.
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Comments: 40
TFPMiko [2016-11-04 13:38:11 +0000 UTC]
My God this is beautiful. Words cannot describe the immense emotion it has evoked.
showed me it last night. She was actually the last to comment on it here; her comment thing is right below mine as I type.
This got a mention in a journal of mine.
...
*breaks down and starts sobbing*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to TFPMiko [2016-11-05 03:54:54 +0000 UTC]
Thank you so much! Like, for reals. I don't pimp this poem out much, because it is so raw and vulnerable and I feel it so intensely. So whenever someone finds it, and it touches them, I am grateful.
I also saw and read your journal.
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laurapsycho [2016-11-03 21:17:11 +0000 UTC]
god fucking dammit, that was amazing. i mean...the ending...it made me feel things and come close to tears. i'm not really much of a megop shipper, but i don't take this in a romantic context; more of them both finding peace with one another and within one another.
and believe me, my dude, i wish we humans could spark bond too. more than you could ever imagine.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to laurapsycho [2016-11-04 04:17:52 +0000 UTC]
Your comment just made my whole week. Thank you so much!! I'm always so very, very grateful when somebody finds and reads this poem. Thank you for loving it. Thank you for telling me your reaction!
Basically "Thank You" x a million!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
QuechuaAymara [2012-04-24 11:46:03 +0000 UTC]
Boundles beauty I see in this. Great love I feel in it. And I love this piece. If this was the speech of Joseph when he surrendered, I cannot think of anything that speaks out more love towards others than this just did.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to QuechuaAymara [2012-04-24 18:27:36 +0000 UTC]
Thank you so very, very much. Your comment meant a lot. I can tell you are a writer -- your words have a wonderful rhythm to them.
I think what I appreciated most was that you seemed to be reading this poem in the more universal/historical/mythical sense in which I wrote it, and not only as a piece of fanfiction.
Again, thank you. Fly well, friend.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Ha-HeePrime In reply to ScreamtotheStars [2010-09-22 03:30:13 +0000 UTC]
Thank you so much!
I care a lot about this one.
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Intress [2009-07-26 08:09:44 +0000 UTC]
beautiful. i love it. it shows that, despite their outward feelings, they really care about each other. sounds kinda like me and my brother to be honest XD but it really touched me. its what i think about all the time... just not in words.. more like emotions. towards my brother you know? i love him with all my heart, but i hate him with a passion too. ._. its frustrating sometimes. i bet Optimus and Megatron feel that way too. i wonder....[link]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to Intress [2009-07-26 23:28:47 +0000 UTC]
Thank you. I am always encouraged when people read and respond to this poem. I put a lot of my own feelings and beliefs into it, and care for it a lot.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Intress In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2009-07-27 02:28:28 +0000 UTC]
its very beautiful. i love the way you put it... it really touched me. i was close to tears x3 i have tried some works of my own, but they suck right now. i'll find one i did a few days ago and see about posting it. i'd like your oppinion on it. besides, your a really good poet. ^-^ it would be good to get your advice. :3
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to Intress [2009-07-27 04:39:20 +0000 UTC]
Sure! Send it.
And I wish you all kinds of luck in your writing.
(And thanks again, very much.)
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Intress In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2009-07-27 05:27:10 +0000 UTC]
now if i can just find the thing and get it typed up and put on here.... its my first time putting anything on here so im a little nervous XD *checks old notebooks* now where did i put it...?
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
DrewsterHotRod [2008-09-12 17:40:07 +0000 UTC]
They are brothers in the sense that they were both created by Primus. I never felt that they hated each other anyway. They respect each other and often would cooperate against something more dangerous. *is thinking of Countdown to Extinction from G1 season 2*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to DrewsterHotRod [2008-09-12 21:15:13 +0000 UTC]
Yeah; I was thinking of that episode, too! (Loved that one.)
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
DrewsterHotRod In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2008-09-12 22:11:59 +0000 UTC]
Megs is so misguided.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to DrewsterHotRod [2008-09-12 23:45:50 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, but try tellin' HIM that...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
DrewsterHotRod In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2008-09-13 04:06:01 +0000 UTC]
I'm not. But Starscream probably would. XD
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
CrowInTheOliveTree [2008-09-04 00:02:59 +0000 UTC]
You should read mine!
You're is awesomer though!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Ty-Chou [2008-08-21 05:17:03 +0000 UTC]
I really, really like this poem. And this relationship you're describing, it doesn't have to be slash. There are all kinds of love. In a way, there can be a kind of love existing between them. It's just not the physical, romantic kind. But the words in this poem are absolutely beautiful and tell your thoughts and feelings very well.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to Ty-Chou [2008-08-21 05:21:39 +0000 UTC]
Thanks muchly, Ty. I was going for intimate, because it'd have to be, but not erotic, because... eewww.
(Dang it, I really need to pull myself out of the moral crisis I'm in about TF pairing, but I'm not sure which direction the exit is in...)
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
RazzieMbessai [2008-08-14 08:21:04 +0000 UTC]
I don't quite know what the word is to describe this... it's sweet, thoughtful, intense, deep and completely honest all at the same time
I don't like slash at all so I very rarely post a comment on it, but to me this isn't slash - it's just pure thought and emotion from one brother to the other
If only the humans of the real world could be so open-minded to each other...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to RazzieMbessai [2008-08-14 14:50:55 +0000 UTC]
Thank you so very much! Your comments really meant a great deal to me. I care so much about this - I wrote and re-wrote and re-wrote it, trying to make sure that it was saying Exactly what I wanted it to say, and not going off on any tangents. I also wish that the people of the world would just take a moment to really try to understand each other, before jumping to conclusions and feeling offended, hurt, angry, disappointed...etc...
I'm so glad to hear that you like this so much. I worry so that it is sooo clooose to slash, but I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN IT THAT WAY!!! So if that is coming across correctly, I am greatly relieved!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
RazzieMbessai In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2008-08-14 21:21:16 +0000 UTC]
You're welcome - and no, it's still not slashy even on a fourth and fifth read
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to RazzieMbessai [2008-08-14 23:08:28 +0000 UTC]
Sending you the Big Red Robot Hug of Infinite Love!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
RazzieMbessai In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2008-08-15 16:08:07 +0000 UTC]
I've never had one of those before!
*gives you a Little Squishy Hug of Infiinite Love, which just about fits round the end of your toe*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
RazzieMbessai In reply to Ha-HeePrime [2018-02-11 18:08:38 +0000 UTC]
And here we are, almost 10 years later, and I legit just squeed myself into oblivion - TEH MULL3T's first of many Big Red Robot Hugs of Infinite Love
But seriously, thank you for making these read-aloud versions and for being so awesome in Real Life. It's weird-yet-awesome to see the time you were "only" a name on a screen
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
coraxonyx [2008-08-11 11:55:23 +0000 UTC]
Given the events in the "exterior" world this week, I wish there were more people who held to your mindset. Thanks for sharing this!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to coraxonyx [2008-08-11 16:59:03 +0000 UTC]
Yeah - it seems like the events in any week are enough to cry out for peace and understanding. It's hard sometimes, inundated with all the heartache in the world, to actually believe it all can really be happening. I just wish I really were Prime, and that it could be this "easy" to fix it all...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
BunniTeeth [2008-08-11 09:19:31 +0000 UTC]
Oh my.... Prime; that was incredibly beautiful. I'm almost speechless.
I also like the concept of Megatron and Optimus bonding to stop the war. That's the main thing I like about their pairing.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to BunniTeeth [2008-08-11 16:49:07 +0000 UTC]
Thanks a lot, Kisa. I really appreciate that.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ZombiesAsAMetaphor [2008-08-11 01:46:06 +0000 UTC]
Prime, that was beautiful. It really was. Metaphors are such wonderful things...
Seriously, I'm gunna feel all warm and fuzzy and love-filled all day.
Infinite love!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to ZombiesAsAMetaphor [2008-08-11 01:49:12 +0000 UTC]
Thanks pal - very much.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
DiamondLily [2008-08-11 01:28:42 +0000 UTC]
hmm interesting but totally plausible and yet not weird at all. It's like a desperate cry to end the madness or soemthing.
Me likey!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ha-HeePrime In reply to DiamondLily [2008-08-11 01:36:31 +0000 UTC]
Thanks - I'm really glad you liked it. That is exactly what I was (nervously) going for. And thanks for faving, too.
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