HOME | DD
JazzlasterBoris — Octopus on a Typewriter
Published: 2009-08-06 01:07:16 +0000 UTC; Views: 1895; Favourites: 23; Downloads: 7
Redirect to original
Description
Ten points to the person who can conjur up the most immersive analogy.Related content
Comments: 367
'tis the crux of the matter.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
The source of the chaos?
The crucible of the dischord?
The dreaded epicenter of the schizophrenic destruction?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
all three and more in this new deluxe package for only $19.99! that's right! $19.99!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
A-ha! I can tell this is a scam, because all three of those things are exactly alike!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
you're right! but order now and we'll warp your reality and make them different things for no charge! *minor restrictions may apply.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Death of a family member is not a minor restriction.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
nor a major one. it suffers from middle restriction syndrome.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Therefore, it is too insignificant to be taken seriously, yet too potent to be considered cannon fodder, and is resultingly completely ignored.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
unless, of course, it writes a best selling memoir. the public needs to know.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
It would be a very medious book, however. Not appraised for its good extremes, and not parades about and laughed at for its insecurities.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
it wouldn't be too long or too short.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
It would be the "little bear's" book.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
yep. eventually some blonde bitch'll eat it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
...After ruining two other books, one being hardcover and the other paperback.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
of course this one is one of those paper back books with an outer cover.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Such an unbelievably average book.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
the kind that middle school kids will be forced to write reports on, and will completely forget about later in life.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
I.E, completely useless, like a t-ball stand in a batting cage.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Or a skeleton made of rubber.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
that could be useful, actually. it wouldn't snap as easily, as long as you weren't out in the cold. you'd be pretty bendy, too...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
...Actually, yeah. This could be the next great innovation in gymnastic technology.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
wolverine's cousin, maybe. 0.0
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Wolverine's homosexual cousin.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
rubber is usseful for all orientations.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Experience is a worthwhile trait.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
i've always thought so. so did copernicus.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
He sounds like a truly inspired man.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
oh yes. i try to follow his example every day.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
As would I, as were I you, and you were I.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
but where does that leave me?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
With absolutely nothing.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
back where i started...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
So you have lost nothing. Congratulations!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
except for my dignity.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Even that isn't up to much.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
no, but i could have pawned it for a few bucks.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Admittedly. Those dollars could go towards something more practical, like a television set or a garden rake.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
or the tea-set i've wanted since i was 3 1/2...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
This even further proves you weren't the most masculine male child in your preschool.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
but i WAS the most masculinr female.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
At least that's an acheivement.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
yes. i have a certificate. or at least kind of a certificate. it's torn piece of construction paper that says, "yur a boy" from the girl who sat next to me during circle time.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
unfortunately, the horrid teacher took it and threw it away. my friendship with that nameless, faceless girl was never the same again.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
<= Prev | | Next =>