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leopardivory β Take My Hand
Published: 2004-04-10 20:00:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 8406; Favourites: 136; Downloads: 3106
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Description
Please take my handlike you did when I was young.
Keep me close to you
to protect me across the busy street.
Though that traffic ridden street
now symbolizes my future.
So many different obstacles
that I must quickly overcome.
There is no easy way
for me to get through this.
There is no crosswalk
that I can safely take now.
So won't you just please
come with me and lead me?
Please direct me through
this hectic time in my life.
Please take my hand
like you did when I was young.
Keep me close to you
to protect me from the future.
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Comments: 304
Right.
Well, I'm leaving now. So, bye!
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a beautiful symbiosis between words and this manip, my dears!
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Thank you so much, dear! 
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wow is all i have to say this piece moved me i really liked it alot
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Thank you very much!
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Thats a great poem. You have talent!
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Thank you so much!
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Holy shit hon. I absolutely ADORE the image. The hair looks especially good.
The poem is so sweetly beautiful too. No critiques from me. Just big smoochies and jello jigglers.
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Jello jigglers, WHOO! 
Thank you, also! I'm glad you like it!!
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Listen to ~inebriate . Also, if you knew that this wasn't your best work, it makes me sad to think that your fine with it being a "Daily Favorite", or something that represents the *best of the writing community here on DA.
Something else for you to mull over: This is a public forum. As soon as you post something, it is open to the opinions of others. If you don't want opinions, don't post your work. It's as simple as that.
Opinions are like assholes. You have to learn to live with them, otherwise you cease to learn and, therefore, live.
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Uhm, there is nothing I can do about people making it a Daily Favorite. Of course I'm fine with it. If they like it and think it deserves a favorite, more power to them. Though, I think most of the favorites from this are due to *Myangelofmusic 's image that she created for this piece.
Also, I will take critiques from people when I want them and when they aren't putting down my friends in the process of doing that. Thank you.
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the butterflies really dont work with the poem, i think they should be, dont know 
somthing more urban, like buses, taxies, bikes, and so on, the clouds should have a road too
the sky should not be all on this grey blue, is too depressive, should be golden and rose, some rainbows will be better too, (this way the butterflies would be worked), try with some little ponies, will result happier
aaaah, sorry, you wanted no critiques (i thought was only about the "poem")
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I didn't make the image, *Myangelofmusic made the image.
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I'd leave you criticism, but you seem to be completely unable to handle anything that isn't a direct compliment.
I will simply state that your piece needs crucial revision and would suit a "chicken soup" book more than any sort of poetry binder.
This is not a "mean" comment. If you deem it as such you are obviously making some connection to truth behind it.
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As I said before, I never said this was my best work, not at all. I know it isn't. I simply submitted it for what it is, and that's all. As I said last comment, feel free to critique any of my past poems. If you don't like my stuff, then just leave it at that and move on.
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I didn't mean to criticize this as I had, I didn't realize everyone was bumming around because you didn't want critique.
I'm done with it, yadda yadda.
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Feel free to check some of my others if you want, but thanks.
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Ouch.
Here's a piece of criticism for you.
It is sad that you cannot read what was in the description, you being the "poem critic" here. She would have asked for such criticism like yours (which rolls off your tongue, or fingers in this case, in such a horrendous way), but she didnβt. If you don't like the poem, then donβt comment; itβs easy, isnβt it? People commented that they like it, thereβs really no need to get all angry about it.
No one around here is the poetry police, nor should you pretend to be so (page views and just because you write poetry doesn't make you one).
Have a nice day, dear.
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I am not your little brother, do not tell me how to behave. I'd left no criticism and should be recieving no flak for such. Had I given her criticism, there would be much more depth to my comment than what you decided to glance over. Thanks for nothing. I do not write for pageviews or your lucrid opinion.
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Never said you were my little brother, nor am I telling you how to behave. Oh wait, maybe I am.
So the comment about how this was chicken soup than a poetry binder had no depth to it? Well, seemed quite poetic and of some metaphorical value to me with a bit of underlying meaning to it. Maybe you should also see what you have written here: [link] for some of your so called "no criticism"
Anyway, I am glad to be of some service to you, dear.
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Oh I can think of a few ways you can service me.
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this is so pretty and reminds me of myself...very good...pic is good too
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Thank you very much, glad you could relate to this!
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i like the feel of her eyes as i look at them.
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All credits on the image go to * Myangelofmusic !
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wonderfull! ilove this picture!!!
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Thank you very much!
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The poem is captivating, and the image is dazzling. I effing love this.
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Thank you so much for the great comment!
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I really like the manipulated image. But I think the poem could use a lot of work. I'll avoid critiquing since I know you don't want one, but I think that you should either make it longer and elaborate on the theme, leaving a little bit more to the reader's imagination, or make it much shorter. I think the concept is very nice, but the poem seems very monotonous because the entire thing could just be one line long and it would have the same effect.
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Thank you for not being rude about it like another person who left a comment on this. I do appreciate critiques, when they aren't something flat out rude like what he left that doesn't help me at all. The only reason I didn't wish one on this, is because I actually gave it to my mother in her Easter card, sort of as a gift, so it was pretty personal but I know she understood it. Otherwise, thank you for the comment!
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I think it's a good poem overall, those are just a couple things that I think could be improved. But you're a great writer and I'm sure your Mother is thrilled to get such a great gift from you.
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I agree with you.
And thank you once again!
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I just love what you did with the photo. Amazing work. Looks so fragile and soft and beautiful.
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Oh, I didn't make the image! * Myangelofmusic made it for me.
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it's great and the poem is very beautiful too.
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Thank you very much!
I checked out your gallery, and I love your photographs!
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