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Previous part: Ugly Feelings
Next part: I Told Him

It's been seven months since Aravali saved me that very first time. Seven months since I've become Aravali's apprentice. Seven months since making my very first friend. My best friend. My tutor. The guy I was head over heels in love with. I've been playing this game in my head lately. Where I would count how long I've been able to be friends with Aravali. I never thought friendship like this could exist, at least not for me. It wasn't until I fell in love with him that all of that got ruined. At first I pretended everything was the same. I tried to act the same way I always did when I was with him. But as the weeks passed it became increasingly hard to "act normal". In fact it was hard to even remember what normal had ever been. And as I found myself struggling with this, I reduced the amount of time I spent with him altogether. Which was definitely not what I wanted but I'd rather see less of him than have him figure out I was in love with him. Which could result into him not wanting to see me at all anymore. So instead of going back with Aravali after work I would often meet up with Gold Dust. Sometimes I worried if he was getting tired of me. Yet when I asked him about it he would scold me so I guess it was okay.

Gold Dust has been an amazing friend to me. Not only was he the only one I can talk to about Aravali but he was also just a lot of fun. His stories always made me laugh and he knew so many games to play. We'd often meet up with Gamble and Scott at night and stay out until late. With all this going on I was actually able to enjoy myself even though I still missed spending my free time with Aravali. The first few times I told Aravali I wouldn't be going back with him he was surprised. But it seemed like he was happy I was getting along with the other Guardians. However I've been avoiding him more and more lately. I've noticed Aravali giving me a strange look every time I told him I was meeting up with Gold Dust. But he hadn't said anything yet.

It had been a long day working with Aravali. He had been rather close to me which had made it very hard for me to keep my calm. In the end I was exhausted. Keeping up the whole "normal" charade was wearing me out. No longer did I crave his little touches because I knew my reaction could give me away. Instead of his closeness making me happy it now only made me tired. And I honestly felt like I wouldn't be able to keep this up for much longer. It made me hate the fact that I had fallen in love with him. It would have been so much easier if I could have just stayed his friend. As the end of the workday had fallen I'd immediately excused myself and told Aravali I'd agreed to meet up with Gold Dust. He'd given me another one of his strange looks. I had the feeling he wanted to say something to me but he didn't and I had quickly made my escape. Spending the rest of the day with Gold, Gamble and Scott in the Main Lands. I usually returned to Aravali and Sanchay before it got too late but this day I didn't want to go back. So I stayed out with them till much later than usual. That was until Aravali showed up. Wearing an expression on his face he'd never once directed at me before.

He was angry. I'd been lying down but I immediately jumped to my legs as I saw him appear. Why was he here? He made his way over to us, his eyes never leaving mine. Gold Dust and the others had stopped talking, leaving the air filled with silence. "Woo Boost, do you have any idea what time it is?" his voice was low but something about it sent shivers down my spine. Before I had time to give him an answer Scott and Gamble burst out laughing. "You sound like you're his dad", Gamble snickered and Aravali finally tore his gaze away from me to glare at him. "Come on Aravali, it's not like we don't all have work tomorrow. He's not a little kid", Scott added and gave me a little grin. "He's my apprentice", Aravali sounded both tired and angry at the same time. He turned his eyes to me again. "Let's go home, Woo", he told me. It wasn't as much a suggestion as it was a command. My eyes dropped to the ground and I nodded. "See you tomorrow", I said to the guys and they all wished me a good night. Gold dust was looking after us with a very peculiar look in his eyes. When his eyes found mine he tilted his head to the side with a supportive grin.

It wasn't a long walk back to Aravali and Sanchay's place. But it felt like forever. I didn't know what to say so I stayed silent. Aravali did as well for a while. Before he stopped. "Woo, you need to tell me when you're going to stay out till this late", he said after a moment of hesitation. "I'm sorry", I replied my eyes stuck to the ground. I could hear him turning around to face me. "Are you-", he started, stopped and then started again, "Are you still having fun?" I looked up to face him, the question surprising me. "Of course I am", I replied, determined. I could see him mulling over my answer in his head. Somehow he looked rather... Sad. "I just have the feeling that you've been avoiding me lately", he said and I could feel my heart jump in my chest. I knew it. I knew he'd been looking at me funny when I had left. "I'm not avoiding you", I couldn't bear look him in the eyes as I said the words. "You should know by now that you're a horrible liar", Aravali told me and my face flushed. "I mean if I've done anything that made you angry with me or something you can just tell me", his voice sounded strained. My heart ached. I didn't want to lie to Aravali. "You haven't done anything wrong", I told him, which was the truth making it easier to get the words out of my mouth. "Than what is it? Something has changed between us and I don't like it", his eyes held mine making my breathing speed up. Saying things like that would only make it worse for me.

Seven months. Seven months I've been able to be friends with Aravali. To work with him. To train with him. To talk with him. To laugh with him. Surely for someone like me that was already too much to ask for. I should just be happy with what we have. Why must my heart be so set on wanting more. Silence dragged on as I was still debating on what to do. I could see Aravali frowning at me, confused, maybe even getting a little frustrated. He was about to say something but I gestured for him to stop. "It's okay", I said, probably more to myself than to him. This was okay. This was going to hurt but it was going to be okay. No more lies. No more avoiding. I closed my eyes and took a breath, already feeling the sting of tears behind them. But I willed for them to wait. "I like you", I said. The earth felt unsteady to me but that was probably me shaking on my legs. Aravali looked taken aback, "Well of course. I like you too." They were the right words. The words I'd longed to hear from him for weeks now. But the most horribly wrong intonation. My chest squeezed tightly as I considered backing out. It was already obviously clear this was going to end in disaster. "No, Aravali, I'm sorry. I'm in love with you", slowly my tears were starting to roll down my cheeks. This hurt so much more than I had imagined and he hadn't even said anything yet. "I'm sorry."

Aravali seemed to struggle with his words. My confession had been too serious to take as a joke. "Are you... Are you gay?" was his first question. His eyes shifted from my face to the side, never looking me quite in the eyes anymore. He was postponing his actual reaction. I wasn't sure whether that was the gentle or the cruel thing to do. "I'm not sure yet", my voice was shaking as I struggled to keep myself from outright crying. "I just like you". I wasn't sure what I was seeing in his eyes now. Some sort of horrified disbelief maybe? "I can't", he struggled to form a sentence but those two words were already enough to shatter my heart to pieces. I knew he was going to reject me. Never for a second had I actually believed he would return my feelings. So why did I feel like I was choking now? "I'm sorry Woo. I just don't see you in that way. You're my friend", I don't think I've ever seen him look more uncomfortable as he was looking right now. My throat burned from keeping in my sobs. "I know. I'm sorry. I didn't want it to be like this either", I smiled a sad smile. Had confessing really been the right thing to do? Aravali looked absolutely miserable. Because of me. "Woo. I uhm...", he started but didn't seem to know what to say. "It's okay. This is my fault not yours. I'm sorry for troubling you with this", I felt hollow inside. "Woo", he said my name, his brows furrowing. I couldn't stand looking at him anymore. Not with the way he was looking at me now. "I'm going to sleep over at Gold Dust's place. I'll be on time for work tomorrow. Could you please maybe try to forget about this?" I wonder if he thought I handled that like an adult. I wonder if he could see I was barely holding it together. As I turned around I could hear Aravali telling me I didn't have to sleep somewhere else but I couldn't talk anymore. I followed the path to Gold Dust's place and I didn't break down and cry until I was absolutely certain he wouldn't be able to hear me. That had been the most grown up conversation I'd ever had and it had hurt like hell.

To be continued~

You thought Aravali was just going to like Woo Boost back?
Hahaha
Haha
Ha... Ha
Ha...
...
I'm a horrible person.

Wow this part is a downer ;-; Sorry guys, unfortunately it isn't going to be quite so easy. Goodness there's a lot of apologizing in this part. Well then, I was kind of postponing this part. It was so hard to write this one I feel so bad for little Woo. And for Aravali fot that matter, he's not having the best time either. I hope the next parts won't be so emotionally draining xD

At first this was supposed to be an animation actually. I was really excited for it as well. It was gonna be Woo saying the I'm sorry and crying. But I couldn't get the lip syncing right so I shortened it to just a short cry. But then I just wasn't feeling it anymore. I do have the sketch though, right here I'm Sorry - Animation Sketch Maybe I'll colour it some day c:

I do really like this still image though, it's the last panel from the animation. I had fun with the intensely blue background and trying to convey Woo's emotions :3

I really hope you guys will be able to like this despite all the heartbreak

Woo Boost, art & story: Paardjee
No Reference used.

Description
Previous part: Ugly Feelings
Next part: I Told Him

It's been seven months since Aravali saved me that very first time. Seven months since I've become Aravali's apprentice. Seven months since making my very first friend. My best friend. My tutor. The guy I was head over heels in love with. I've been playing this game in my head lately. Where I would count how long I've been able to be friends with Aravali. I never thought friendship like this could exist, at least not for me. It wasn't until I fell in love with him that all of that got ruined. At first I pretended everything was the same. I tried to act the same way I always did when I was with him. But as the weeks passed it became increasingly hard to "act normal". In fact it was hard to even remember what normal had ever been. And as I found myself struggling with this, I reduced the amount of time I spent with him altogether. Which was definitely not what I wanted but I'd rather see less of him than have him figure out I was in love with him. Which could result into him not wanting to see me at all anymore. So instead of going back with Aravali after work I would often meet up with Gold Dust. Sometimes I worried if he was getting tired of me. Yet when I asked him about it he would scold me so I guess it was okay.

Gold Dust has been an amazing friend to me. Not only was he the only one I can talk to about Aravali but he was also just a lot of fun. His stories always made me laugh and he knew so many games to play. We'd often meet up with Gamble and Scott at night and stay out until late. With all this going on I was actually able to enjoy myself even though I still missed spending my free time with Aravali. The first few times I told Aravali I wouldn't be going back with him he was surprised. But it seemed like he was happy I was getting along with the other Guardians. However I've been avoiding him more and more lately. I've noticed Aravali giving me a strange look every time I told him I was meeting up with Gold Dust. But he hadn't said anything yet.

It had been a long day working with Aravali. He had been rather close to me which had made it very hard for me to keep my calm. In the end I was exhausted. Keeping up the whole "normal" charade was wearing me out. No longer did I crave his little touches because I knew my reaction could give me away. Instead of his closeness making me happy it now only made me tired. And I honestly felt like I wouldn't be able to keep this up for much longer. It made me hate the fact that I had fallen in love with him. It would have been so much easier if I could have just stayed his friend. As the end of the workday had fallen I'd immediately excused myself and told Aravali I'd agreed to meet up with Gold Dust. He'd given me another one of his strange looks. I had the feeling he wanted to say something to me but he didn't and I had quickly made my escape. Spending the rest of the day with Gold, Gamble and Scott in the Main Lands. I usually returned to Aravali and Sanchay before it got too late but this day I didn't want to go back. So I stayed out with them till much later than usual. That was until Aravali showed up. Wearing an expression on his face he'd never once directed at me before.

He was angry. I'd been lying down but I immediately jumped to my legs as I saw him appear. Why was he here? He made his way over to us, his eyes never leaving mine. Gold Dust and the others had stopped talking, leaving the air filled with silence. "Woo Boost, do you have any idea what time it is?" his voice was low but something about it sent shivers down my spine. Before I had time to give him an answer Scott and Gamble burst out laughing. "You sound like you're his dad", Gamble snickered and Aravali finally tore his gaze away from me to glare at him. "Come on Aravali, it's not like we don't all have work tomorrow. He's not a little kid", Scott added and gave me a little grin. "He's my apprentice", Aravali sounded both tired and angry at the same time. He turned his eyes to me again. "Let's go home, Woo", he told me. It wasn't as much a suggestion as it was a command. My eyes dropped to the ground and I nodded. "See you tomorrow", I said to the guys and they all wished me a good night. Gold dust was looking after us with a very peculiar look in his eyes. When his eyes found mine he tilted his head to the side with a supportive grin.

It wasn't a long walk back to Aravali and Sanchay's place. But it felt like forever. I didn't know what to say so I stayed silent. Aravali did as well for a while. Before he stopped. "Woo, you need to tell me when you're going to stay out till this late", he said after a moment of hesitation. "I'm sorry", I replied my eyes stuck to the ground. I could hear him turning around to face me. "Are you-", he started, stopped and then started again, "Are you still having fun?" I looked up to face him, the question surprising me. "Of course I am", I replied, determined. I could see him mulling over my answer in his head. Somehow he looked rather... Sad. "I just have the feeling that you've been avoiding me lately", he said and I could feel my heart jump in my chest. I knew it. I knew he'd been looking at me funny when I had left. "I'm not avoiding you", I couldn't bear look him in the eyes as I said the words. "You should know by now that you're a horrible liar", Aravali told me and my face flushed. "I mean if I've done anything that made you angry with me or something you can just tell me", his voice sounded strained. My heart ached. I didn't want to lie to Aravali. "You haven't done anything wrong", I told him, which was the truth making it easier to get the words out of my mouth. "Than what is it? Something has changed between us and I don't like it", his eyes held mine making my breathing speed up. Saying things like that would only make it worse for me.

Seven months. Seven months I've been able to be friends with Aravali. To work with him. To train with him. To talk with him. To laugh with him. Surely for someone like me that was already too much to ask for. I should just be happy with what we have. Why must my heart be so set on wanting more. Silence dragged on as I was still debating on what to do. I could see Aravali frowning at me, confused, maybe even getting a little frustrated. He was about to say something but I gestured for him to stop. "It's okay", I said, probably more to myself than to him. This was okay. This was going to hurt but it was going to be okay. No more lies. No more avoiding. I closed my eyes and took a breath, already feeling the sting of tears behind them. But I willed for them to wait. "I like you", I said. The earth felt unsteady to me but that was probably me shaking on my legs. Aravali looked taken aback, "Well of course. I like you too." They were the right words. The words I'd longed to hear from him for weeks now. But the most horribly wrong intonation. My chest squeezed tightly as I considered backing out. It was already obviously clear this was going to end in disaster. "No, Aravali, I'm sorry. I'm in love with you", slowly my tears were starting to roll down my cheeks. This hurt so much more than I had imagined and he hadn't even said anything yet. "I'm sorry."

Aravali seemed to struggle with his words. My confession had been too serious to take as a joke. "Are you... Are you gay?" was his first question. His eyes shifted from my face to the side, never looking me quite in the eyes anymore. He was postponing his actual reaction. I wasn't sure whether that was the gentle or the cruel thing to do. "I'm not sure yet", my voice was shaking as I struggled to keep myself from outright crying. "I just like you". I wasn't sure what I was seeing in his eyes now. Some sort of horrified disbelief maybe? "I can't", he struggled to form a sentence but those two words were already enough to shatter my heart to pieces. I knew he was going to reject me. Never for a second had I actually believed he would return my feelings. So why did I feel like I was choking now? "I'm sorry Woo. I just don't see you in that way. You're my friend", I don't think I've ever seen him look more uncomfortable as he was looking right now. My throat burned from keeping in my sobs. "I know. I'm sorry. I didn't want it to be like this either", I smiled a sad smile. Had confessing really been the right thing to do? Aravali looked absolutely miserable. Because of me. "Woo. I uhm...", he started but didn't seem to know what to say. "It's okay. This is my fault not yours. I'm sorry for troubling you with this", I felt hollow inside. "Woo", he said my name, his brows furrowing. I couldn't stand looking at him anymore. Not with the way he was looking at me now. "I'm going to sleep over at Gold Dust's place. I'll be on time for work tomorrow. Could you please maybe try to forget about this?" I wonder if he thought I handled that like an adult. I wonder if he could see I was barely holding it together. As I turned around I could hear Aravali telling me I didn't have to sleep somewhere else but I couldn't talk anymore. I followed the path to Gold Dust's place and I didn't break down and cry until I was absolutely certain he wouldn't be able to hear me. That had been the most grown up conversation I'd ever had and it had hurt like hell.

To be continued~

You thought Aravali was just going to like Woo Boost back?
Hahaha
Haha
Ha... Ha
Ha...
...
I'm a horrible person.

Wow this part is a downer ;-; Sorry guys, unfortunately it isn't going to be quite so easy. Goodness there's a lot of apologizing in this part. Well then, I was kind of postponing this part. It was so hard to write this one I feel so bad for little Woo. And for Aravali fot that matter, he's not having the best time either. I hope the next parts won't be so emotionally draining xD

At first this was supposed to be an animation actually. I was really excited for it as well. It was gonna be Woo saying the I'm sorry and crying. But I couldn't get the lip syncing right so I shortened it to just a short cry. But then I just wasn't feeling it anymore. I do have the sketch though, right here I'm Sorry - Animation Sketch Maybe I'll colour it some day c:

I do really like this still image though, it's the last panel from the animation. I had fun with the intensely blue background and trying to convey Woo's emotions :3

I really hope you guys will be able to like this despite all the heartbreak

Woo Boost, art & story: Paardjee
No Reference used.