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Top Ten Grammar Errors
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Published: 2008-03-21 20:46:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 44395; Favourites: 1294; Downloads: 1099
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Description
A number of people asked for this, so here it is: The top ten grammar errors most frequently made by inexperienced storytellers._________________________________
The document itself is fairly self-explanatory, but what is not self-explanatory is the rationale behind writing such a thing. I know that a number of people don't like being told what to do when it comes to grammar, and my aim here is not to exacerbate their grievances. Rather, my purpose here is simply this:
If you write, and you don't follow these rules, no-one will want to read what you wrote. You could be the next Shakespeare, but if you ignore the rules --- and I don't mean break the rules, because there are times when breaking them is useful --- but if you ignore the rules entirely, no-one will ever want to read what you wrote. No-one will ever get past your first mangled sentence, much less to the good part involving the llamas and the chickens and the ghost of the boy's father in the bathhouse.
Like it or not, most readers are much more harsh and judgmental than I have been in this document. So follow the rules to the letter until you learn the correct times to break them. Astute readers will know the difference between you voluntarily choosing to break the rules and you being ignorant of them.
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There is also one unspoken rule here, which is simply spell correctly. I think that almost goes without saying in an age where spell-checking software is cheap and plentiful.
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So there it is. If you want a printer-friendly PDF version of this, just ask, and I'll be happy to prepare and post one to my scraps.
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Edit, 2008-03-22: The typographical error in the example in #4 has been fixed.
Related content
Comments: 509
Yay, you know about commas! 
...I use hyphens for connecting stuff. I don't really like the look of the em dash. So big. So I just add a space before and after a hyphen. Simplier that way, and I like how it looks. Maybe I'll think more about em dashes, though.
I might use your paragraph section some. I know when to start a new paragraph, but paragraph length is slightly confusing to me sometimes.
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Nice Job! Thank you for the tips!
Here is a link to a story, I wrote. What do you think about it?
Link: fav.me/d7taaa8
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I added a comment on the story that details some of its issues. I hope you will construe it as constructive criticism.
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Thank you very much!
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The format in which this is presented is hilarious and I love it. Funny, informative and accessible and thus a winner.
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This is the most beautiful thing in the world...
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This is really funny to read. (I'm sorry, I can't think of any other word)
It made me think back of my first story when I thought to be a great writer.
I know different nowadays. But I definitely will keep this, because I'll have English classes again next year and I want to see how many people are going to make those mistakes (including me, because I know myself better now and I know I will make mistakes)
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Actually, the correct pluralization is "persons." In that use, it's not "person" = "human being" but rather "person" = "part of speech," which is a different noun entirely and uses the traditional pluralization. That said, "people" is not the correct pluralization of "person" anyway, but is merely common use. See [link] for more details.
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I have that spell check to help me write my sentences using correct spelling...
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Thanks! Ha ha ha ha ha!
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“John goed through the garden and would of saw a bird.” <- Made me crack up. I don't know if it was because I read it out loud or what but it was lol-tastic.
A great into on having better grammar. Thanks!
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I think it should be mandatory for anyone who uses the Internet to read this. :]
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This is so great! For me as someone who doesn't have english has her first language, this helps a lot! I don't make so many error's anymore (:
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This is really helpful... I hope I can avoid these mistakes.
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Reading the comments to this is almost as awesome as the piece itself, and it's true: I'll stop reading a work if the first few sentences are grammatical nightmares. I have my BA in English, and grammar was always a sore spot for me when I was working on peer edits.
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... I totally agree. I always say, when I write anything, grammar is half the battle. I know if I come across a story that's written in chat-speak or ALL CAPS, I'm not going to read it. 
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You know it's not "no-one", right? No one.
Just sayin'.
Otherwise, this was quite fun to read and I love the way you had things worded. :3
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Please. PLEASE. Show this to all people who make wolf comics. D;
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to the store Bill at the store! BAHAHAHAHA!! XD
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Thank you for making this! It's a good guide for those who need to focus on the main mistakes of English language. Plus a lot of people like to ignore their English classes. It's good to get a real persons input like this.
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Very helpful! I usually have trouble with number 3
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While I pride myself on excellent grammar, I do tend to get caught up in when to use -- or (). Thanks!
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How about the notorious Your and You're? A lot of DA gets this wrong... (A lot is two words. ^_^)
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Awesome, I'm submitting this to my persnal faves as well as that of #The-Writers-Review and #Eclipsed-Serendipity . We all make mistakes, but these are made much to commenly.
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Wow! I have been trying to figure out the whole "it's and its" problem for a really long time. Thanks so much for this fantastic tutorial!
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Oh grammar how I love you! You're what makes reading possible! I remember all those terribly written fanfictions I used to read at quizilla when I was younger. I don't know how could I read them. Next thing you know they'll start making fanfictions with '733t' speak.
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I read fanfiction. That alone should tell you that I constantly run into stories that have the mistakes that were stated here. The errors I seem to run into the most are #'s 1 and 4. I feel like I'm the only one on FanFiction.net that actually points these things out to them...
I should show this, um, "tutorial," to all of my friends there.
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I share your pain.
I'm on FF.N a lot. There are too many stories on that site (and countless others) where the summary/idea was interesting enough, but I had to give up on it because of how poorly the fic had been written. It's a shame, really. Some of them had been very creative.
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That's the worst part! The stories are creative enough, but they had so many mistakes and/or they lacked that essence that just makes you feel like you actually care about what happens in the story. That is probably why I only read stories with more than a 100 reviews.
This kind of reminds me of what my little sis said. She told me that on this other website, she stopped reading stories with good summaries because they were almost always horribly written. It turned out that the ones with crappy summaries were the better ones.
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There are plenty of stories on FF.N that don't have 100 reviews, but are still very enjoyable. (I like to think my own are among them. I'm rather biased, though, now aren't I? 
I actually think there is something worse than a good story idea that is poorly written: a well written fic that clashes with your worldview. I've read some that were very addictive, but there was just so much junk (Perhaps "junk" is a bit harsh, but it is how I feel.) in the story that I couldn't continue reading it. I will forever be wondering how those stories ended. Even more so when I stumble upon the fic again and see that it has been completed.
(Your little sister is quite right. Writing a worth-while story, and advertising it well, are two entirely different skill sets. 
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If a story has over 100 flames... Actually, I can't even fathom how a story could have that many before it was discontinued and/or deleted by the author.
I don't seem to have those issues often. Don't know why though. It mystifies me.
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They're out there. Mostly written by people who crave attention and don't care if it is the good or bad kind.
And you are most likely more liberal than I am. I can ignore a lot of things if the story is good, but there is a certain point at which I can take no more. You could also merely be better at picking fics that don't go against your views.
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*sigh*
At this point, I'll probably believe both of them come to play. Didn't really think being "liberal" had anything to do with it though. Its an interesting thought though.
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Thank you for the guide! I first clicked on it because I was amused, but after a second, I paused, stopped skimming, and actually started reading.
I have a few questions to ask you:
On #4, there IS a way that 'wrong' could be correct. But, is the person that is narrating the story in first person named John? Is there another person named John that is walking beside him, if the first guy's name IS John? Or is his name John and is his friend's name Bill? Or, does he even have a friend walking next to him?
Sorry, that was more than a few questions. I hope that makes sense....
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I think that #4's in 1st person, and the person's name is John, so when they say "John, I need John's help" or whatever, the proper way is "John, I need your help."
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Most useful (although I'm pretty sure #10 operates differently for British English...). Would you mind it if I linked to this in the future?
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Thank god for this guide. This needs to be hung up in classrooms.
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I have a question for you. Is it correct to switch back and forth between tenses throughout a story? For example, a story starts in present tense, but switches to past tense in the second chapter, then back to present in the third, and so on. I'm not sure if it makes sense the way I explained it, but the parts in past tense may be meant to be flashbacks.
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It's not impossible to do so, but you have to be incredibly careful or your writing will seem gimmicky: In short, that's a technique for experts only, and I would venture that ninety-nine experts out of a hundred wouldn't touch it with a ten-foot pole.
Remember that writing is written to be read and that the first rule of good writing is to empathize with your readers. Before you write anything, you should consider how it will affect your readers when they read it: Will your decisions make the writing easier to read? Harder to read? Will they add to the piece from the reader's perspective? Will they be detrimental to the piece? Will they have no effect at all?
Think of writing more like sculpture: You should never ask, "What more can I add?" but rather, "What else can I still take away?" If "regular tense-switching" can be removed without significantly affecting the feel of the piece, remove it because it's not adding anything.
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