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#prison #twilightsparkle #mlpfimmylittleponyfriendship #prisonjumpsuit
Published: 2016-09-15 01:58:50 +0000 UTC; Views: 19628; Favourites: 124; Downloads: 40
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"Here, put this on." The guard said in a demanding voice as he tossed Twilight an orange garment, which she caught with her face. She examined it for a bit and realized it was jumpsuit. It had to be the uniform she would be wearing during her imprisonment. "Quit Stalling and get your Jumpsuit on!" The guard shouted which startled Twilight. She put her hind legs in with ease, but struggled to put in her front legs through the sleeves. She then buttoned up her jumpsuit as the guard began to get impatient. As she buttoned up her uniform, it began to hug her body. Her jumpsuit felt snug, yet stiff and had a strange smell to it. She looked at herself in one of the shower rooms mirrors. She looked nothing like the Celestias Star Pupil she once was. Now she looked like dirty convict clad in a bright orange to indicate that she was now nothing but a second class citizen of Equestria."Oh don't feel bad, you actually looked kind of cute in your jumpsuit!." The Guard teased "In fact Orange goes well with your purple coat!"Twilight immediately felt embarrassed and wanted to run away and hide. She tried to teleport away, in vain as her horn was locked away and with it her ability to cast magic."Alright enough chit chat, this way sweetheart." He lead her to a station with what looked a mugshot wall and a table with papers and an ink pad sitting on it. The air was dusty and had a stale smell and taste to it, indicating how old this detention facility is. The guard pointed to the mugshot wall and ordered Twilight to put her back against it. He then gave her a plaque with on it her name, and Prisoner ID, "CR4ZY1." She held it against her chest as the guard prepared the camera for shooting. Thoughts of guilt raced through her head. She regretted casting that damn want it need spell back in Ponyville. Was that not enough for Princess Celestia? Her thoughts were interrupted with a loud click and a white flash as the guard took her mugshot.
"Alright, lets get your hoofprints." he said with an uncaring tone of voice. This annoyed Twilight. "Can he not see that I'm going through the worst day of my life?" She thought. "I've been arrested by my mentor, told that I was basically going to have my rights taken away from me, and will never see my friends again for a while." But her thoughts were interrupted when the guard shouted, "PRISONER! Get over here so I can get your stinking hoofprints!" He yelled in an impatient tone of voice.
Twilight went cold when she heard those words come out his mouth. Instead of refering to her as ma'am or miss, he called her prisoner in the most uncaring and cold tone of voice she had ever heard. The thought of being called Prisoner was unbearable to her, but she would have to accept that's what she now was, and would be living like that for the next two years. Twilight immeadiately did what she was told and walked up to the table. The guard took her left hoof, dipped in the ink box which was cold to the touch and slammed it on to the sheet of paper. He then lifted her hoof wiped it clean with a rag, and proceed to the same to her other hoof. He then told her take a seat while he finished putting together her rapsheet. As she waited, twilight took a better look around the room. The stone walls were weathered, indicating they were old and the floors were damp and cold, it was truly a place she did not want to be in. Her jumpsuit restricted certain movements she made, making her feel like her body was imprisoned. It all added more sadness and served as a reminder of the events that led her into this predicament.
"Okay, now I just need to you to go over your rapsheet which will also tell you why you are here, and then I will take you to your cell." the guard suddenly said. Twilight immediately stepped up and examined her rapsheet, but then she started to sob. Her rapsheet had her mugshot, hoof prints and the crimes that she was being punished for; Casting a class 3 banned spell, assault with magic, mass destruction of property, and filly abuse. If anything this further reminded her successful life was over, and that her new miserable life had begun. "Alright, lets go" the guard order Twilight as he her down a dimly lit corridor with rows of steel doors on both sides. Like the previously room, the air cold and dusty and the floors were icy cold. It all felt like a tomb and it was as if Twilight was being taken to her burial chamber to be sealed up in. Finally, they came to a door on the left. The guard inserted one of his keys into the keyhole and with a loud click and thud, he opened the steel door. "Get in", He ordered Twilight. She did as she was told, and entered a damp, dark cell with a weathered cot on the right with a a toilet on the left with no sink, and like the rest of this place, it was freezing cold despite it being in the middle of spring.
"Welcome to your new home little girl." the guard taunted before slaming the door shut and locking it. When the door closed all of the light suddenly disappeared, and with it all of Twilight's hopes and aspirations as she became lost in the darkness. After standing still, her eyes began to adapt to her tomb and She collapsed on her cot and began to sob and cry. Tears poured across her face,as sadness took complete control of her heart and mind. She had been betrayed and abandoned by her former teacher who had condemned her to this dark pit of despair. She missed Applejack and her delicious apples. Rainbow dash with her talk of how she was going to be the best flyer. Rarity and her beautiful dresses. Fluttershy and her cute cuddly animals. Pinkie Pie and her fun parties. But above all, she missed spike, the baby dragon she had raised since he was an egg and considered her little brother. She would never see any of them again until she was released, which seemed like centuries, rather than two years.
Related content
Comments: 81
jamesdajos [2024-02-29 23:34:21 +0000 UTC]
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
LTBD312-YouTube [2023-02-12 19:44:30 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
prometheushunter2 [2022-11-17 04:57:31 +0000 UTC]
👍: 3 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to prometheushunter2 [2022-11-17 05:59:31 +0000 UTC]
👍: 2 ⏩: 0
ninjasharkV [2022-10-15 20:56:37 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ninjasharkV In reply to ninjasharkV [2022-10-15 21:00:07 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Kimberly-AJ-04-02 In reply to ninjasharkV [2023-07-08 15:28:13 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
CarExpert99 [2022-10-10 01:22:29 +0000 UTC]
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
AmericanUnionState18 [2022-07-19 17:24:49 +0000 UTC]
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
Enigmus-288 [2021-08-27 23:17:13 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Dakari-King-Mykan [2021-07-16 04:41:08 +0000 UTC]
👍: 1 ⏩: 0
NotMeleeFox [2021-03-15 13:48:33 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NotMeleeFox In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2021-04-03 02:44:13 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
gregterry480 [2016-09-17 19:18:33 +0000 UTC]
Overall
Vision
Originality
Technique
Impact
Again, this is great work. Twilight's misery is evident in the artwork, and the description is wonderful. I do kinda wish you had shown her cell after describing it, though. Still, the "comic panels" are wonderful, and the guard seeming like a jerk just adds to Twilight's discomfort. We can tell it's going to be a VERY long two years for her. But maybe some of her friends will join her later on? It seems like Celestia might start rounding them up after putting Twilight away for such a long time.
Anyway, wonderful job, and Twilight's long shadow in the last panel just adds to her loneliness. Well done.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to gregterry480 [2016-12-10 02:32:31 +0000 UTC]
You should update this critique because I have changed some of the facial expressions, added in textures, a toilet in the forth panel and edited and expanded the story in the description.
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
gregterry480 In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2017-04-06 21:23:15 +0000 UTC]
I really don't know how to use some parts of DA. How do I delete a critique?
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
gregterry480 In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2017-02-20 03:19:07 +0000 UTC]
I'll try to update it sometime this week! Any chance we'll be seeing more prisoner ponies from you?
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
JojoDaggerback [2019-02-03 19:05:46 +0000 UTC]
Hey, have you seen the video "Penguins behind bars" ? If your are still going with this series it might be worth a look
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
JojoDaggerback In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2020-06-03 13:02:30 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
BluDeucee [2018-12-06 03:29:40 +0000 UTC]
heh easy for her to say somepony Framed me for armed robbery, property Damage, and attempted murder and ended up getting sentanced to 17 years in Ponyshoe island in MAnehattan that has 3 security levels and marked as a Maximum security inmate
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Victorfazbear In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2018-11-26 21:47:44 +0000 UTC]
i was just saying i'm hope i'm not in jail
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to Victorfazbear [2018-11-27 01:08:56 +0000 UTC]
Did you break the law?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Victorfazbear In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2018-11-27 01:26:57 +0000 UTC]
not really is just try to aboid to breaking law thats what i do
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to Victorfazbear [2018-11-27 01:35:52 +0000 UTC]
Then you will NOT go to jail.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Victorfazbear In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2018-11-27 01:41:34 +0000 UTC]
in mind:well oc making is not crime but hope i like diamond
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
lunchymunchies [2018-09-01 09:06:42 +0000 UTC]
Why does the guard look so much like Big Mac?
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
LolaDreamTeam [2018-02-27 19:33:41 +0000 UTC]
I might start thinking that Twilight will soon end up become Midnight Sparkle like Princess Luna became Nightmare Moon in 1000 years ago...while in prison...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LolaDreamTeam In reply to LolaDreamTeam [2018-02-27 19:35:29 +0000 UTC]
I was meaning that Twilight might end up become evil like Luna did in the past.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to LolaDreamTeam [2020-05-23 23:32:00 +0000 UTC]
I have no plans on bringing in Midnight Sparkle
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
LolaDreamTeam In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2020-05-24 01:06:27 +0000 UTC]
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to LolaDreamTeam [2020-05-24 01:26:27 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, im a bit bored. Better late than never
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
JLBarnett [2017-07-09 20:56:03 +0000 UTC]
I want to see the consequences of the rebellion the other five and Spike start after this
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to JLBarnett [2017-07-09 21:50:09 +0000 UTC]
They wouldn't start a rebellion over a mare convicted of ponyslaughter
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
JLBarnett In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2017-08-03 02:42:14 +0000 UTC]
these are the Elements of Harmony, bound together by destiny. Of course they would
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
SpellboundCanvas In reply to JLBarnett [2017-08-03 02:57:35 +0000 UTC]
No they wouldn't. Sure they'd be upset, but they would not try to organize a full scale rebellion to challenge the power of a sun goddess over twilight getting convicted of ponyslaughter. They would simply accept the fact that twilight was being punished for killing somepony with her irresponsible use of magic and move on. END OF STORY.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
JLBarnett In reply to SpellboundCanvas [2017-11-03 02:22:42 +0000 UTC]
sorry, I don't buy it
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
SpellboundCanvas In reply to tulacoe [2017-01-05 03:26:14 +0000 UTC]
Alternate ending to lesson Zero
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
TheBigLargeMchuge In reply to tulacoe [2017-01-05 04:59:41 +0000 UTC]
What do you think it means?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
EcliptorCalrissian In reply to tulacoe [2017-03-27 05:27:56 +0000 UTC]
If you remember Lesson Zero, she plunges Ponyville into chaos with that want-it-need-it spell. In this story she got thrown in jail for doing that instead of getting away with just a good talking-to.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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