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The-Combine-Engineer — Amalgamation of Practice Sketches

Published: 2018-05-27 03:55:20 +0000 UTC; Views: 1617; Favourites: 21; Downloads: 1
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Description "Lord Admiral, the light of the Astronimicon shines once more. Reinforcements have been dispatched to the Gothic sector. The Warp Storm, It Is Gone."

 Alright, have a seat. I've got a bit of a story to tell, and some of you may find it helpful. Now, I can't be arsed to remember the exact order in which I drew everything, but I can remember what I had started with, and what finished my work. Starting with...
    -Mister Vest Man, which was the first thing I put on the paper.
    -Mister Suit Man, who immediately followed Vestite.
    -The Sisko-type defender, which doesn't look particularly well.
    -The NCC-1701 Enterprise
    -Armageddon class Imperial battlecruiser
    -The Cylon Toaster
    -TOS styled shuttlecraft
    -TNG style type-6 shuttlecraft
And ending with...
    -Shanghelli Honour Guard (I think)
    -X-15 experimental supersonic rocket-plane
    -Russian MiG-21 interceptor fighter
    -An Atlantic version of the Lehigh Valley Railroad streamliner locomotives, I'm not sure which one though.
 Heh, I drew all of these entirely freehanded, you can tell if you stare too long.

    And now for the lengthy mess of a story that will hopefully explain my absence.

 The mess started near the end of December 2017, where I took it upon myself to draw a "Gift Comic" for another user. And that is where the first mistake was made. I had thought out how the short story would go, but I never wrote it down anywhere, hoping that my memory and imagination would fill in the blanks. Of course, the first row of panels came easily to me, as expected. Following that however, my mind completely blanked out, and my work ethic stalled. I would sit there, staring down at the page, desperately trying to figure out how I would perform this now painfully difficult task. Sure, maybe once a week I could pull my mind together long enough to actually draw out a single panel, but that wasn't nearly enough to really get it done.

 And as the days quickly became weeks, my mental state rapidly decayed, unbeknownst to practically everybody, even family. My mind stagnated alongside my drawing, leaving me feeling empty, alone, and devoid of any motivation or desire. I would find my eyes virtually glued to my smartphone's screen. I would spend most of my weekends in my room, either jamming out to music, watching Youtube, or avoiding tasks. My apetite was limited during this time, and often, I would forget to feed myself lunch, and barely eat dinner. Much of the time was wasted just moping around. And this would continue for over three months.

 I didn't simply give up, oh no. Instead, multiple times a day, I would tell myself some version of "I will sit down and get this done today!" As you might have expected, this turned out to be a lie. I said this to myself, and nothing happened, as if I was somehow expecting everything to work out just fine. Which clearly, it did not. Why I did this to myself, I have no clue. And I never did tell anybody about my conundrum, I just kept quiet about it. And I would cycle through varying degrees of depression or mad-nothingness on a daily basis. For over three months, barely any work happened.

 This depressive episode hung over me like a hurricane, and held me down. I was stuck like a beached whale. And yet, I never told anybody about it. Sealed like a tomb, my internal struggle was hidden from all... And it was weighing me down like a ton of bricks. I couldn't bring myself to do anything without complaining. Nothing was enjoyable, except youtube from my phone.

 Until, during a week-long break, a small, but powerful thought struck me. This Gift Comic was the perpetrator behind my sadness. And because it was a gift, I didn't have to actually post it. But I couldn't just throw away my work, I had to work on it. That was when another thought hit. I still want to work on it, but I don't have to finish it completely. So, I set a much more achieveable goal. I would simply finish one row of panels in one session. Then, and only then, would I feel satisfied with my work.

 The next day, I sat myself down at my desk, pulled out the page, grabbed a pencil, and worked. I ignored my normal distractions, even going so far as to leave my phone in the other end of the house, and turning everything else off. I opened the blinds and curtains that restricted the amount of natural light into the room. Within the hour, I had completed the last panel of the row. The last few panels were of sub-par quality, but they were done, at long last. A great epiphany struck me as I realized some of the many mistakes I had made. There wasn't enough natural light in the building, my posture when seated was atrocious, I was trying to draw in a cramped space, and I was directly in front of the secondary refridgerator and the "Deep Freeze" unit.

 After a few days of mental rest, I decided to get back to my drawing norms, but also try something... different. So, on Sunday, the first of April, I removed a page from one of the many sketch books I had laying around, let the light shine in, and went at it. As stated above, I started with Mister Vest Man, because I wanted to practice or at least play with bipedal anatomy. I quickly finished him and felt like continuing on, so along came suit boy. Being more confident, I attempted to draw my Star Trek fan-design, the Sisko type defender. Obviously, the result is a little disappointing, especially when compared with everything else on this page. But that didn't discourage me, certainly not. Following that, I drew the TOS style Enterprise, which I knew I could draw without any kind of guidance. Then I decided to try something entirely different, but still within familiarity. I had Warhammer 40,000 on my mind, so I felt like drawing a starship from there. As you can see, it is something I can really take pride in. And that was where my drawing spree for that day ended.

 Over the next week following that wonderful day, I made myself draw something simple and easy, which is where the Cylon Toaster, and Trekkie shuttlecraft come in. Because they were simplistic and could be done on the fly, I had no issue with drawing them, even if it was only one drawing per day. It was at this time that I also realized that my drawing area was terrible, so I sought out a new place. I found myself at the Kitchen Island Countertop, which had much more natural lighting and a seating position that fixed my terrible posture. And then, I designated that spot as my newfound drawing studio area, which is perfect for my needs.

 After that, my memory is a bit vague, but evidently, I experimented a little. "To spread the Greater Hood, my dudes," came up, and I decided to draw a human-Tau warrior to go with the phrase, which I will admit, still makes me chuckle a bit. Basically, what happened was; I wanted to practice a few new things, and essentially drew whatever came to mind that day. Which led to the Sub-Sandwich among others. I let my mind run rampant with whatever was the subject of my intense interest, and it proved effective.

 This became a preferable work ethic. My mental state elevated, and I was actually drawing stuff, without it feeling like a chore. I never really set a goal for the number and type of sketches. Instead, I just filled in the empty spaces with something that would fit. Eventually though, I did set a requirement; just one more steam locomotive drawing and my 'quota' will be fulfilled.

 Afterwards, I wanted to post this drawing, alongside pictures of my latest 3D-Prints (which had also stalled at the time), which unfortunately suffered a similar fate as the comic up above. My mental state did not change, but I found myself making the same mistakes again. I.E.; saying I would do that "today" but not actually following through on that, and getting sucked into the world of my phone.

 And all was not "Hunkey Dorey". When I finally got around to scanning in my drawing, I couldn't get my macbook to start without it spending upwards of two hours just getting to the login screen. And then my macbook would stall if I tried to open anything, freezing but with the cursor still mobile. On the off chance that I did manage to get the scanner program open, the program would freeze whenever I attempted to select the area of the page to scan. And this really drove me off. I was absolutely livid for hours. The following Sunday, I tried again with my macbook, which ended in disaster, as you might expect. No, I could not just plug the printer-scanner into the computer towers that are next to my old place of work, they run Windows XP, and would only say "Unable to locate proper drivers", which only fanned the flames of anguish that came from the dysfunctional macbook.

 Then, towards the end of that day, my mother remembered that the scanner had come with an installation disk for Windows systems. I force-fed that installation disk to the XP tower and swiftly worked through the installation wizard. Within minutes, I finally scanned in my sketches, and after some consideration, decided to use the XP tower to upload the resulting file. I spent the rest of the day typing up a storm as I wrote the first few parapgraphs that you read earlier. I'm not sure about you people, but that definitely felt like some sort of blessing...
 
 Now then, I can safely say that some of those reading this might not understand what I am getting at with the whole personal experience and such. Well, let me summarize a few things that some might find useful, even if it's a bit out of order.
  •  Write a script before you draw a comic. I learned that the hard way, with not knowing what was going to be in the next image and how I would draw it.
  •  Never say "I will do it today!" without actually meaning it. What you should do is designate a specific time, preferably around three hours long, eliminate all distractions (even music), let in plenty of natural light, and just DRAW.
  •  What are you waiting for? Why do you keep saying that you'll do it later? I understand if you're at work or school, but what's stopping you from drawing at home? Just set aside some alone time and get to work. 
  •  If your task has somehow become daunting, trim it down a bit. No sense in straining your mind for something that doesn't seem possible anymore.
  •  You want to draw something but don't know what? Take a page from my experience and draw whatever is on your mind. Maybe illustrate your feelings. For example; how's school going? Anything unusual happen? (And that one can be very subtle) Maybe go to the front page of Deviantart and scroll along until you find something that tickles your interest, and instead of simply favouriting, let that image inspire you, and draw something similar. 
  •  Depression can feel suffocating, until you express yourself in the form of art.
  •  Speaking of depression, I used it as a fuel for my creativity, as weird as that may sound.
  •  Draw something that is familiar, but also completely new. I had never drawn any kind of gothic-styled warhsip before, but would you look at that, it's my best starship sketch to date.
  • Sit up, don't slouch, and use your legs. The office chair I was sitting in before I moved to the Kitchen Island sits too close to the floor, and I have to hunch over to use the computers, which heavily influenced my mood, negatively.
  • Have you ever tried taking a walk outside once every few weeks? That is something I forgot to mention. I could actually think whenever I took a long walk around town and the nearby hills.
I do hope somebody finds my experience and advice to be helpful. Keep in mind though, I have had some help in the past, and I have developed decent coping skills that may have played a part in me helping myself. I know that quite a lot of people have not received assistance like I have, and maybe that's why I managed to help myself and keep it out of other's lives instead of uploading concerning posts everywhere.

 Now then, with all of that completed, I can get back to creating stuff. I've already had some brilliant thoughts come to me recently, and I must put them to paper. No sense in holding in my creativity too.




 (About that quote)




And now I will be slightly petty and mention a person that I think would like to see.  CharizardtheArtist  
Related content
Comments: 38

The-PBG [2018-07-07 12:01:40 +0000 UTC]

You have a good variation with your art style.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to The-PBG [2018-07-09 06:40:50 +0000 UTC]

Thanks, I tried quite a lot with this.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

werelightshine [2018-06-06 06:26:42 +0000 UTC]

And,

THE GREATER GOOD IS COMING TO YOU FROM MY BOLTER, ALIEN.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-07 06:20:29 +0000 UTC]

DO THE DEATHS OF YOUR SOLDIERS MEAN SO LITTLE TO YOU? ARE YOU THAT MAD?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-07 16:25:25 +0000 UTC]

Do the deaths of yours mean so much? ARE YOU THAT WEAK?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-08 06:04:21 +0000 UTC]

I don't have any other relevant quotes....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-08 18:59:22 +0000 UTC]

Me neither.


Okay, one more: Orks only respect strength, I intend to show them we have it in ample supply.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-09 05:39:24 +0000 UTC]

Oi humies, yer in Ork lands now.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-09 06:24:54 +0000 UTC]

Ya callin' me names greyskin? Me boyz iz gonna hafta teach ya some mannaz!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-10 06:20:12 +0000 UTC]

Again, I'm all out of quotes... we good though?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-10 11:57:29 +0000 UTC]

Yes.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

werelightshine [2018-06-06 06:25:57 +0000 UTC]

I see a Leet, I see planes, I see Spaceships, I see a guardian, I see a few people, I see the intro to Ace Combat 2, I see the SpaceX, I see a Thomas, and an Emily,

damnation, TANKS, WHERE AH DA BLOODY TANKS?!

Oh well, 'least ya didn't forget the Battle Barge.

You seriously got more done in a few minutes, than I have in a week.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-07 06:16:54 +0000 UTC]

Guardian? What guardian? And I'm pretty sure those are normal trains.

That's no Battle barge. And this took me just over a month to do. Clearly you did not read the description. If you had, you would know full well that I am not a speedy sketch artist.

And I have never seen any Ace Combat intro, what you were looking at is a Russian MiG-21 interceptor.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-07 16:27:34 +0000 UTC]

The Tau was the guardian.


And all imperial ships look so similar to me.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-08 06:07:56 +0000 UTC]

Ah... hmm. I thought they were referred to as Gue'vesa or something like that.

Hmm, perhaps I could produce a guide on the matter. Is that something you wouldn't mind seeing? It'd simply point out the most noticeable differences. Namely the prow silhouettes.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-08 18:58:22 +0000 UTC]

If you wouldn't mind....

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-09 05:29:43 +0000 UTC]

Alrighty then, I'll eventually get to it. I started working on something already, but it shouldn't take nearly as long to do.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-09 06:38:15 +0000 UTC]

Spleen-dead, have you tried your hand at 3D animation? It may suit you.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-10 06:21:07 +0000 UTC]

What do you mean by "Spleen-Dead"?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-10 11:57:07 +0000 UTC]

"Indeed"

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-11 07:31:52 +0000 UTC]

Ohhhhkaaayyy....

Never heard that one before...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-11 14:49:43 +0000 UTC]

which one? 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-13 07:45:37 +0000 UTC]

The "Spleen-Dead" one. What else could I possibly be talking about.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

werelightshine In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-06-13 15:30:25 +0000 UTC]

Alright. This just became awkward.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to werelightshine [2018-06-14 06:24:38 +0000 UTC]

I suppose so.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

GethEngineer [2018-05-28 19:30:14 +0000 UTC]

THAT'S BLOODY AMAZING OWO

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to GethEngineer [2018-05-29 05:50:12 +0000 UTC]

Many thanks my friend.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

GethEngineer In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-05-29 09:15:51 +0000 UTC]

I Think there is much room to improve on organic subjects but on in organic ones you're so good!


A moment of Soviet anthem for glorious Russian MiG 21

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to GethEngineer [2018-05-30 06:29:23 +0000 UTC]

Yeah that sounds about right. That's why I did some characters, to kinda practice that.

That too.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

GethEngineer In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-05-30 09:28:49 +0000 UTC]

I underestimated you greatly

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to GethEngineer [2018-05-31 05:40:24 +0000 UTC]

I didn't know you estimated me in the first place.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

GethEngineer In reply to The-Combine-Engineer [2018-05-31 07:57:29 +0000 UTC]

Isn't that what people do?
Like when you meet someone and get to know them you start thinking "OK this is what they can and cannot do"
?
Or am I just weird?

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

themightywolftiger [2018-05-27 16:10:08 +0000 UTC]

The little guy looking approvingly towards the drawings, and the enterprise. They are both my favorite things in this

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to themightywolftiger [2018-05-28 07:08:39 +0000 UTC]

Heh, thanks.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Wildfire-of-Mars [2018-05-27 07:34:05 +0000 UTC]

Ooooh there's a spaceship thar

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to Wildfire-of-Mars [2018-05-28 07:08:25 +0000 UTC]

Yes indeed there be starships one this thar page.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

GrantExploit [2018-05-27 05:27:44 +0000 UTC]

I will read the description in the morning...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

The-Combine-Engineer In reply to GrantExploit [2018-05-27 07:02:14 +0000 UTC]

Yeah. I hope you don't mind the massive pillar of poorly written syntax which details the folly of a lonely and depressed person.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0