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wrensharpbeak — Broken Visage
Published: 2007-10-09 01:48:33 +0000 UTC; Views: 2670; Favourites: 54; Downloads: 0
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Description
A scene from "The Shallows", the ninth story in my Avatar: The Last Airbender fan-fiction series found at [link]Excerpt from "The Shallows"
(chapter 8 - Embrace)
As her finger traced the edge of the scar, she was overcome by a confusing tempest of guilt and pity, and she looked upon him for once not as Zuko her former enemy, the fire bender, the prince, but as a normal teenage boy, with normal teenage boy feelings just the same as Sokka’s or Aang’s.
She gently stroked a thumb across the scarlet, rutted skin as she whispered sadly.
“I wish I could heal it.”
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Comments: 9
This is great...'Advanced Critique Encouraged' huh...well the only thing I can think of is that piece of the mask he had on doesn't look right.
It's from his right eye the unscared one, when it's his left eye that was scared. I thought she was supposed to be holding the piece that covered his scar.
Did that make any sense or do I need to retype my comment?
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Actually, if you look a little closer, you will see that it -is- the left side of the mask. The top is facing away from Katara...
The eyebrow is at the tip of her thumb, and the area where the nose would be is the jagged edge where it was broken. The smooth edge (pressing against the joint of the thumb and index finger) is the outside edge of the mask.
It's easier to see all of this in the original sketch. Reducing stuff for the web tends to cause some details to be lost.
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Oh your right! Sorry about that, guess my eyes are playing tricks on me. I love your fan fiction story and the art you made is amazing. I look forward to reading future chapters.
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No worries. As i said, sometimes the details are harder to see once the image is reduced for web viewing.
As for future chapters...i'm working on them. Hopefully i'll have another up by the end of the weekend.
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Hey,
I just read the newest chapter '19.4 Reunion' it was great and I can't wait to read more. I also read your question to start another fic fiction or not before you finish this one, my advice is to finish the first then after it's over you can give your undivided attention to the new one. However, it's completely up to you.
I have to say, I've been reading a lot of fan fics and yours is definatly one of the best.
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Aww, that's lovely. I kinda wish Katara healed his scar too, but at the same time I'm glad she didn't. Healing his scar would, in my opinion, take away from Zuko's character.
Advanced critique encouraged....Oh...but I don't know what I could possibly critique on. This is certainly better than anything I could churn up. The only thing that looks a little off is Zuko's left hand. It kind of looks small if you really look at it, but I didn't notice this right off the bat, so it's really no big deal.
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Hrm...now that you mention it, the foreshortening there DOES look a bit off. I'll have to fix that some day.
Thank you for the input! It's always appreciated.
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Hey, it's you!
Wow, that is gorgeous...I especially like their hands. Nice mood, too
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