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DestinyBlue — Fix Me
Published: 2016-01-28 15:00:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 147787; Favourites: 9263; Downloads: 1123
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Description
You've done your best with the tools you've got, but what if it's still not good enough?
Ask for help.
Today I'm going into hospital.
I am being taken to stay in a psychiatric ward again for a bit while I try and get my brain better.
Everyday is tough, I've tried really hard to do nurturing things and stay positive. I think I've done pretty well, considering. But I need to accept that I can't do it on my own at the moment, I need help.
Doctors are not sure of my diagnosis, my symptoms are more complex than depression/anxiety. I'm not worried about what they'll label me with, I just want to get better. I've started writing about my experiences, which is helping. I'll share it all with you when I'm stable again. Though presently I can't begin to describe how horrible it's been; except to offer a small insight: I feel like death would be better than a life like this.
Yup. I need help.
This illness has taken so much from me. I don't want to let it take my life too...
Peace, Love and Asking for Help,
Blue
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~Featured Artwork~
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Comments: 746
this piece of art is AMAZING like all of your other works! nice job
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Beautiful work. Now get treatment and get better, that's an order! We can't lose an artist of this calibre.
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My gosh, this painting is so beautiful! The careful strokes, the vibrant colors... not to mention the stunning eyes! Thank you for creating this inspiring piece of artwork.
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Whatever it takes to make you happy with yourself, baby. Take care and keep strong!
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I love the use of complimentary colors and the painterly style.
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I love your use of facial expression and colors, they always get the message across well!
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her design reminds me of elsa SO much
but nevar give up D:
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Blue, your art has always made me feel like there is someone else who understands and that however alone I may feel sometimes that there is someone else who has felt the same; that you have felt the same. Your artwork is so powerful, and you are the one that gives it that power. I wish I had words to say that could help, but just know that you aren't alone, and that you matter. Your worth is greater than you understand, and the world would be a much bleaker place without you in it. Keep fighting! My thoughts are with you!
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No matter what happens, know that we believe in you and your convalescence, and that dozens, hundreds of god vibes and positive thoughts are being sent to you.
Times are hard (though not as much as you, I know that myself as well...), but we can do it, together.
Needless to say your art is always so amazingly full of meaning and fll of your own identity, it always amazes me everytime I see it in my inbox.
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Although this may get washed away in a sea of comments, I still wanted to say this to you >u<
Blue, you know deep within your heart that death is not the right answer. It won't fix things. Although I never get to chat with you because I'm so quiet, know that I truly and honestly trust in the fact that you will get through this. Know that even in my silence, I have not abandoned you. I truly believe in you Blue. Don't see yourself as worthless because of your mental health, but rather, see yourself as a beautiful soul -an incredible courageous fighter. You take release and express yourself through your wonderful drawings - and it is so blindingly clear of what of strong person you are from viewing them. I know you still have so much more to say and express, not only to others, but also to yourself. Keep living - don't give in to those thoughts that tell you otherwise. You're not alone Blue. Your mental health is not a demon, so don't fight it. Grow with it, stronger and stronger each day. Keep seeking peace from places outside of yourself.
My thoughts will continue to be with you through your incredible journey xx
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I would just like to say that I hope you read this.
I believe in you. Fully. Whole heartedly. And I know thousands of others agree with me on that.
You have been there for us in ways you might never know.
You have healed hearts you might never meet.
You have brought joy and inspiration to so many people.
You are a true gem in this world, and I will always think about you and care about you.
So when I list these things I hope you believe me when I say we will be there for you every step of the way.
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Hi Blue, Ive always been a fan of your artwork! your so talented and a true inspiration, I myself suffer with depression and Anxiety so i can only try to understand how bad it is right now, i send healing hugs! And if you ever need a chat to try escape the stuff in your mind you can always send me a note!
Hope you start feeling better soon!
Kaiya
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*hugs* i hope everything goes well, you're an inspiration to us all
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Oh I'm so sorry! *hugs* Things will get better soon I promise!
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I hope you come out of this ok. You're amazing, and I'm praying for you.
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Get better soon darling. Your paintings inspire us all
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I really hope you get better, you're an amazing artist and your pictures really connect with me and countless others.
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Were just scrolling down on deviantart, saw your amazing picture and then read your description.
Been there myself, with looking at death as the better opportunity but just like you I really didn't want to.
I feel so much better now, still struggling but thoughts of killing myself is at least gone. And I can enjoy life much more now, living it more, with getting new friends, new experiences, growing.
I wish the same for you. Lot's of all love all the way from Sweden <3
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Best wishes. The chrysalis on Aurora's album cover for "Conqueror" reminds me of your fairy drawings, with their wings. www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-0FF9… ;
Take Care.
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I see your art and it is beautiful I am new I don't really know whats going on but whatever it is get better soon. And man I thought I had it rough I posted an whole rant and what I go through feels like child's play now.
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I really needed to see this today, so thank you.
Get better, and don't give up. The world would be a darker place without you in it.
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I just got back on here after a rough day and started looking through my inbox of deviations. I found your stack of art, and got a small smile on my face(i always get excited to see more of your art). Then, as I was reading the description, I got to the part where you said that death would be better and I felt my heart drop.
I'm glad you're getting help for this, and I want you to know that no matter what happens, even if you don't see this in the thousands of messages you get in your inbox, I wish you the best of luck through this.
Just remember that there's always a light at the end of every seemingly endless dark tunnel.
Stay strong, Blue.
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Beautiful drawing
I hope you get better <3
Wishing you well
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I hope you get better soon, >.< this is really serious
Don't let it take your joy from life!
You will win!
Stay strong!
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Sometimes hiding from pain - all pain - requires hiding from the whole world. But listen...
Sometimes... When the pain is too much to bear... too much to continue to breathe for just one more moment... You breathe in the name of the ones you love and take that breath for them. Because even if your heart can no long beat for you, sometimes... sometimes... it can continue to beat for them. Breathe in. Exhale their name. Feel your heart beat for them. Until it can beat for you again, until you can hold on again... let it beat for them... breathe for them.
You're not alone. You will never be alone. I hope you regain your balance and find some comfort for yourself heading forward.
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Admin: Get better soon. You are strong, I know you can make it.
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your work always blows me away, your characters and colors are out of this world!!
Another amazing peice
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Keep being strong! You're so lovely and amazing! I hope the time in Hospital helps you to clear your head and become stable. This must be so hard for you and i can't even hope to partially comprehend what you're going through. Through i may not be able to understand what's going on in your mind, i want you to know that you've still got us faithful watchers and fans here to support you! We'll try our best to fight those little thought demons and help you out where we can! Be Strong!
~Lea
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I'm glad you're being so positive and strong, all things considered. It impresses me, if I'm to be honest. I hope that everything works out for you well, and I hope you start doing better. I hate to see somebody as sweet as you struggling with such awful things. But we've all got your back, should you need us, and we all wish only the best for you Blue.
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Here for you, wish you to get better.
P.S. I saw you at comic-con last year, I sadly did not have time to come up and tell you how much I love your art, so I hope you get better and I will get the chance to do so.
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So symbolic of your situation, I love her eyes as well. They look like galaxies 🙊
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Beautiful drawing~
And I'm glad you're getting help 
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Your art is beautiful. And props on being willing to seek out help when you need it. Many wouldn't.
Wishing you well.
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Don't give up please. We are all here for you 
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PLEASE DON'T DO ANYTHING BAD!! Blue, you are my INSPIRATION!! You make my days better with every piece of art you create. You take what I feel, what a lot of us feel, and turn it into something for people to absorb and see. You make me realize that other people feel just as broken as me, like their lives are just as invaluable as I think mine to be. But I know that all lives are so, SO valuable and that no matter how hard it may be to see this through the haze of doubt and sadness, people love you so much. You are my shining beacon of hope, even though I have yet to meet you face-to-face. You make it all easier to bear, and I know for a fact that, little by little, it gets better. You can't die for yourself, you must live for those who love you. We all love you Blue <3
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