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DestinyBlue — Fix Me
Published: 2016-01-28 15:00:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 148946; Favourites: 9260; Downloads: 1123
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Description
You've done your best with the tools you've got, but what if it's still not good enough?
Ask for help.
Today I'm going into hospital.
I am being taken to stay in a psychiatric ward again for a bit while I try and get my brain better.
Everyday is tough, I've tried really hard to do nurturing things and stay positive. I think I've done pretty well, considering. But I need to accept that I can't do it on my own at the moment, I need help.
Doctors are not sure of my diagnosis, my symptoms are more complex than depression/anxiety. I'm not worried about what they'll label me with, I just want to get better. I've started writing about my experiences, which is helping. I'll share it all with you when I'm stable again. Though presently I can't begin to describe how horrible it's been; except to offer a small insight: I feel like death would be better than a life like this.
Yup. I need help.
This illness has taken so much from me. I don't want to let it take my life too...
Peace, Love and Asking for Help,
Blue
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Comments: 746
I know how this feels, I, myself, drifted in and out of hospitals for a long time when whatever is going on with my brain hit absurd levels. Doctors still aren't 100% sure what's going on, though I have an inkling of what it might be.
Suffice to say, you did the right thing, asking for help, it goes without saying that there is no shame in asking for help. I've learned that the hard way when certain parts of my life crept up on me and threatened to pull me down into the depths. Our worst enemy is, truly, ourselves and it is an extremely hard fight to hold your own in. Even though we don't know each other personally, Blue, just remember that there will always be people willing to pick you back up should you fall, that you are never alone.
You do amazing, gorgeous art. Keep it up.
Stay safe out there.
E
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Oh, before I hit the "Submit Comment" button, by chance were you at FanExpo Canada in Toronto this past year towards the end of the summer? I remember seeing a lot of your art at one particular booth.
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best wishes! Would be a shame of we'd have to miss such a talent as yours...
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Best wishes, Blue.
And your artwork is amazing, so that's a positive for you to take pride in. A happy thought from me to you.
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I only have a slight notion of what you might be going through, dear Blue.
Trying to stay positive can be very strength consuming and personally it was not my way to heal the wounds since I put too much pressure on being positive and blamed myself, when it did not work. But everyone is so different, so I am not trying to tell you what to do - sometimes you just have to try different things and see if they help you. If they dont, try something else.
The labeling can be very helpful in an early stage of mental illness - in my opinion. It helps to understand that it is not your fault or there is nothing "wrong" with you personally. At some stage I guess it does not longer matter however, what exact illness one is suffering from. Having a name for it helps to deal with it mentally, but once you understood, that there is a organic thing to it (and not your personality jsut so weird) it does not matter anymore what name it is - I guess 
I dearly hope that you can find the help you need. I know what it means to think that life is not really worth living and thinking about just ending the whole matter. But I am positive you know that this is not the truth at all. There is so much to live for. It is something that one knows with the brain, but neglects with the emotion in such a situation.
If there should be anything that can be done from this distance for you - be it only a hearing ear and some consoling words, please let me know
All the best for you and may some light glow into your heart sooner than you expect it and tell you about the things worth living for.
Love,
Mel
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I genuinely hope you get better Destiny. Your drawings helped me in hard times, and I hope that you get help too in whatever form in comes in. You'll be in my prayers.
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Just ask Franken Fran to fix you.
(hehehe)
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Take care, Destiny. Get well soon.
Wish I could be there, I'd bring some kind of get well gift. Maybe cupcakes, if you like them.
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You're very brave for admitting you need help, and even more so for actively seeking it! 
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You have a special talent to portray feelings and emotions in your drawings and I love your art because of that. But I want also that the person behind such an amazing pieces of art is happy.
Don't give up, you can find happiness in life! I'm sure of it!! I hope you'll be better soon!
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I'm not entirely good at praise, so I'll just say something I've heard before. I wish you the best and I'm positive you'll get better 
and good luck
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Stay strong, stay alive. You are loved. We will help you take your life back.
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Outside help is nice, but the one inside of you is the one that will work. Give yourself some unconditional love, treat yourself the way you always wanted to be treated, and that means not only bying yourself things but talking to yourself in the kindest way possible. Anxiety and depression and all other negative things are just red light blinking at you "start loving yourself and start loving others, give love to yourself and give to others" Don't fight your own body! It is only trying to help you. You are the driver of your car (body), and you can fix your car the best because you know it the best. You can do it! I know you can 
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It's really beautiful, I hope you'll get better
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this is beautiful. you're an amazing person, incredibly brave and resilient. with everything i have, i pray for you (even though i'm not religious). whenever i think of you, i hope you are doing okay.
don't ever be afraid to ask for help. with help, you can make it through this. good luck.
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I hope this can help.
A few years ago i was at a really low point. Nothing really helped. Out of the blue, I decided to leave. I drove to Oregon from the other side of the US, and disappeared. I lived out of my car for two weeks, occasionally paying a motel to use a shower (some are willing to let you use the shower of checked out rooms before the maid cleans). It was not entirely thought out, and I almost get mugged by some druggie trying to break into my car at 3am, but it was one of the best things i ever did.
While I cannot say that this trip "fixed" me, or that i was "happy", one thing I can say for certain is that I wasn't unhappy. This may not sound underwhelming, but not wallowing in my own self-pity and endless anxiety (among other things) for two weeks was absolutely fantastic, and helped me to where I am today emotionally. If I had not taken this trip, I don't know if i would have made it to that Christmas.
I feel obligated to point out that when I took this trip I was starting my 6th month on Venlafaxine. It took the edge off my depression, but apart from that only managed to make me feel... weird (taking it before you go to sleep helps with some of that). I quit it two month later for Non-medical reasons I will not dive into, but I just wanted to put that out there.
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i'm so sorry you're dealing with that ! The pic is very cute plus nice symbolism
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I'm so sad right now
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I'm so proud. Sometimes asking for help is the hardest step.
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My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. Ask, and it will be given to you, seek, and you will find, knock, and the door will be opened to you. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.
Just a little something that usually helps me when I'm down.
-Jane
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Well, if God existed, I think we wouldn't have any problems...
Wow, I feel rude, Sorry.
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Well then you think that we are all Gods ... then everything would be perfect indeed 
I will however say that one does not need any religion or Bible to see facts, actually they rather ruin the Truth, and many look into those things, and think ... what a load of shit, so they stop believing, and it is clear, easy giving up. Or they follow blindly thinking that if they follow they are saved ... no way, that is not taking responsibility for our own actions. God is not there to live your life for you, he gave you life that you can live it for yourself and take responsibility for your own life!
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Oh...
You should be philosopher, mate.
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God gives us trials to stregthen our faith. Besides, this is a fallen world. It will never be perfect; perfection in the new world is something for which must wait. At least that's what I believe.
Don't worry. Everynone's entitled to their own opinion.
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Well, anyone can believe anything, as long as you believe it exist, it will exist for you. That's my opinion of religion.
So God exists for his followers.
You're tolerant. I like it ^^.
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So, by what you're saying, the same would apply to truth?
Thanks.
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Depends of what you call truth.
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I define it as what Gods says in the Bible. You?
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I think truth is what can be proved, or something the we believe of all our being that it exists.
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Truth is beyond the physical. Once long ago humans thought that earth was flat and supported by the elephants, and whoever said otherwise was burned, once human said that the water was empty but later found that it is full of life, just because you can not see it does not mean it is not there! It is just limited sences of the body, we are much more then just this body! Just because you can not see pass the horizon does not mean it ends there
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Woe... My head hurts now... I just took a big SLAP in da face...
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Sorry, I don't think I understand.
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I didn't understand what I wrote either...
I don't really know how to describe what truth is...
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Psalm 119:160 says "The whole of your word is truth, and every one of your righteous rules endures forever." God is the measure against which all things are laid; if man is the judge, there is no consistency. 'Truth' may vary from person to person.
Am I making any sense?
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It makes sense.
I like the Bible, even if I'm not religious. I think it's a great story.
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Oh good.
Okay. I, personally, believe that it's history.
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Everyone believes what he or or she wants, as long as they don't try to force people to think the same
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People shouldn't try to force their beliefs on others, I agree.
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awe no :c i strongly hope that you can get the help that you need. I'm currently going through a similar thing, but i don't think it's as serious as what you're going through. I really hope that they can help you.
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