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mindflenzing — RPG Two Kinds of People
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Published: 2013-02-21 17:18:06 +0000 UTC; Views: 874; Favourites: 23; Downloads: 6
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Description
R.P.G. (Ransack People's Gold) is the tale of four D&D/Star Wars/RPG players and their DM, who wishes he were a player. These intrepid players are, from left to right:Kenneth, the over-achieving, yet under appreciated DM.
Adam, the guy who has a theater background but needs a girlfriend.
Barry, the munchkin power-gamer with a bad case of arrested development.
Josh, the straight-laced guy who just wants to play the game.
Kassi, Josh's homicidally-minded younger cousin, whom he regrets inviting.
In my many many hours of updating and reformatting strips I found one I forgot to post to DA! Like most DMs, I found that my players had a strange binary view of NPCs. This causes most DMs to instinctively get defensive with female NPCs. Thus, I made a raunchy female dwarf guild enforcer with low charisma who would sexually harass male NPCs. Let me tell you, DMs are not mentally prepared for your characters to pinch the butt of male NPCs like the middle aged captain of the guard.
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Comments: 104
Heh heh, you said "laid." I know what you mean. I've got as dirty a mind as anybody but I've been caught with my pants down with things that weren't innuendo in my head but were by the time they came to the players.
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Most of my jokes aren't jokes in my head, but later turn out to be giggle-worthy.
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Players tend to enjoy laughing at the DM more than with him. Though, to be fair, when the DM is laughing it is generally because the players are crying.
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My GM laugh is completely different from my "that was a good one!" laugh.
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There are many laughs. Not all are accompanied by dancing on the graves of the PCs.
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If middle aged men with worry lines, short cropped hair, trimmed mustaches, and athletic builds are your thing than yeah.
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SURE... he likely knows stuff!!1 young men are over rated!
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Their look has more character too, which is why Castlevania artist Ayami Kojima prefers to draw middle aged men and hates drawing girls (or is that why?).
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lol...
im nearly 50... I recently had a 18 yr old male posturing about me... and when I replied... "sorry you are a very cute boy... but I dont find you sexually attractive" he was offended... I bruised his fragile male ego... but all I could see lookin at him was my own son...
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I've noticed over the last few years that I can't look at college girls without thinking of them as children.
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yeah... remember when we were young... think back.... and thought OLD people were sooooo not coool?
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I'm reminded of a saying that went something like; when I was young I thought my parent's didn't know anything, when I grew up I was surprised by how much they had learned.
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I am painfully familiar with this situation, the worst comes when the players decide that their characters are bisexual
Great art and execution
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Thanks. My Half Elf Bard is the only bisexual (or in his case more omnisexual) character who has managed to turn the tables on the party/DM when they try to use it against him. Most players are not mentally prepared to go awkwardly far in their character's behavior. But when the other party buckles pretty quickly it is hilarious for the rest of the table.
For example, we had dopplegangers with illusion magic try to waylay us in a 2nd Ed game. The dwarf saw his wife and could not pass an intelligence check to save his life so when the rest of us snapped out of it we were treated to a naked dwarf ploughing a doppleganger in the back door. Everybody else started vomiting and my Half Elf Rogue, Olivia, started shushing everybody else and watching.
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That's pretty sick dude, funny though. I think the worst thing that happened for me was when the whole party ended up in an orgy with an overly horny arch mage, I'll take most of the blame for that one seeing as I as the GM encouraged it. One of the male players were very persistent at not having his junk touch the other male player.
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I had a 3.0 character involved in a Druid convention's drug fueled orgy. To be fair, he was probably not lying to the Barbarian that he had taken him out of the group to keep the Druids from stealing his dreams through his nostrils. This was not so much because the Druids were nefarious but more because the Rogue was mentally ill.
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The rogue was initially based on Stark from Farscape but ended up playing more on the mentally ill side.
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It was, till he was decapitated by a drow executioner while trying to keep the cleric alive.
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Why is it that the Chaotic characters get the selfless deaths?
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Because lawful characters are to lame to get into dangerous and heroic situations ?
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Or maybe because heroism from them is viewed like fake smiles from customer service reps, as a trained reaction rather than a meaningful choice. Or maybe because when the chaotic characters do something heroic it is less likely to be something they are equipped to survive (like drawing aggro).
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That was my point, Chaotic heroism opposed to Lawful heroism is a lot less calculated and thus often more risky
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"We'd rather bed her than kill her" is such a great line.
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I'm rather fond of that one too. It would be better if there were a way to rhyme bed and dead without making the sentence a lot more wordy.
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Haha! This made me choke on my milkshake. Well done!
But why the mature content tag?
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I love doing that to people. I got my old man while he was drinking soda last year.
Since the strip is about the f*ck or kill mentality of players I figured I'd sooner put the tag on than get tattled on by somebody later. You have to prove your innocence once somebody complains about you on a website and that's a pain in the neck.
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Has anyone ever complained about you?
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Not recently. But I have had that problem in many places before, including DA. DA is generally pretty desensitized to adult material of any stripe but there are exceptions and as they say, once bit twice shy.
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Even less mentally prepared for the character of a male player to pinch the butt of a male NPC, you realize.
I think I would have to do what Kassi just did, were I ever in this situation.
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It would be even better to play a gay character in a convention where nobody knows if your are playing your character or yourself.
I can't say I've seen any female players do this but it would be funny.
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THAT WOULD BE AWESOME
'Cept I, personally, would prefer playing a gay guy over a lesbian, which would defeat the entire purpose of making people uncomfortably unsure of just who here is the gay one.
I would have to.
I'd probably turn bright red and start laughing at myself two seconds later, but I'd still have to say that.
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You freak people out who want you to lez out by volunteering to handle the swamp hag and then let them know you are using tongue.
I know you don't have a lot of nights free but if you have a Friday or Wednesday I can see about getting you into a Pathfinder game. You might be the only female player unless Pam shows up though, since Lauryn and Kira aren't playing Pathfinder Society.
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This is the best thing I've read all night.
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............
Nobody's ever wanted me to lez out.
That's probably a good thing. That would squick *me* too much to pull off.
If the offer still stands after I get a new job, that'd be doable. The only consistent obligation I have is the PTA game, because I can't ask for two consistent days off (and of course I always work closing). They might mind having an idiot noob in the group though.
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There is a certain level of detachment you need to have to characters and mental images to pull that kind of thing off.
First off, most of the groups are full of noobs. Second, you have, at your disposal, the guy who made the most broken build in the local society group in less than a month after starting playing the edition.
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Yes. Fortunately, other players can only detach their image of your character from you yourself so far, so no one will ever ask me to have a character lez out, though they will be rude enough to demand gender changes on my male characters. Wow, evidently I still have a crapload of resentment for that guy sitting around in my brain.
Oh, I know you could help me with the build. It's just that I wouldn't know how to play with it, and even if you're telling me what to do, then I'm just doing what somebody else thought up instead of thinking myself. But if most everybody else is nearly as clueless as I am, it shouldn't be a problem.
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That guy whose name is probably Calcera?
My advise then is, don't play a caster.
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Who else?
I'm okay with that. My philosophy in almost any kind of game is usually "run up and hit it with sharp objects until it dies," anyway.
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Mine is generally spam attacks that stop enemy attack animations till dead.
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I'm a big fan of the "mash buttons until the hurting stops" method, myself.
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In many games damage is fast and healing slow so stopping your attacks to heal up generally means a reduced chance of dropping your foe before they drop you. This is why I tend to favor broken damage builds. If a baddie dies before landing a single blow its better than having a lot of HP. Of course, when you hit the meat grinder you are not long for this world.
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...I just prefer hitting things over actually thinking.
I wonder what that says about my testosterone levels...
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